ACI 11 «Руководство к образу жизни бодхисаттвы, часть II», занятие 10

Class Ten: Contemplations on the Perfection of Meditation, Part IV
August 19, 1997
transcribed by: Amber Moore



prayers: [short mandala]
prayers: [refuge]



... on exchanging yourself and other people and Hector will read the first, first
two lines, okay? First two verses, okay hector?

Hector: "On the ulimate and immediate pains of selfishness."

If you fail to practice perfectly the exchange of your own happiness with the
suffering of others, you will never reach that enlightenment and even here, in
the cycle of life, there is no happiness. Forget the goals of the world beyond.
Even in this life, none of the things that you hope to acheive will come about.
Those whos duty it is to serve you will do none of their work and those masters
you serve will never pay."

Gyaltsab Je puts this verse in the category of problems that come to you if you
don't exchange yourself and others. Like, we've been talking about exchanging
yourself and others in the context of something to meditate on while your doing
your chapter on meditation and specifically a way to get bodhichitta. But Master
Shantideva here in theis verse, Gyalstab Je categorizes it, if you read the outline
which you'll get on Thursday. You get reading nine tonight and you get reading
ten on thursday. Master Shantideva puts it in the category of problems of taking
care of yourself and ignoring others that you cannot see. Okay like if you were a
normal person you would go through your whole life and you would never
know that this problem was happening to you. Okay, what are the two
problems? Okay if you watch out for yourself and ignore others people, you
will have... did we do that {rang che ndzin}, and {shen che ndzin}? Yeah, I'll put it
on the board. Two attitudes, right. Say, [rang], [repeat], {che ndzin}, [repeat],
{shen}, [che ndzin], [repeat], {shen che ndzin}, [repeat]. Okay, where is the [n] in
{chen}. It's {ndzin}, okay, prenasal, alright. {Rang che ndzin} means, "Taking care
of your self", watching out for number one, okay, cherishing yourself. {Rang},
means "yourself" and {chen ndzin} means, "to cherish", to cherish somebody", to
cherish yourself. {Shen che ndzin} means to take care of other people, first. First
priority is other people, that's called {shen chen ndzin}. When you practice
exchanging your self and other, you're exchanging {rang chen ndzin} with {shen
che ndzin}, okay. You trade in your watching out for number one for watching
out for other people. Other people should be first on the bus. Other people
should get everything first, you should get everything last, okay, bodhisattva.
But Master Shantideva in this verse is saying that if you don't do that and you
take care of yourself first and take care of other people second. Two things will
happen that you will never knew were happinging they're invisible and if you
don't study itor you don't look into the laws of karma, you'll never know what
your missing, the first one is enlightenment. The first unseen problem of taking
care of yourself first is that you will never make much spiritual progress and
you'll be... I mean, I think there's two kinds, of, to me, frustrating people, three. I
mean one is American people who never meet the Dharma, you know, like
ther's a very limited number of teachers in this country. You know there's
maybe. I think there's only four or five Geshes in this country or something,
who are teaching. you know and it and that's like one for evrey forty million
people or something. I mean it's not enough, I mean so the first thing you, that
you're sorry about is when you hear about people who want to study and they
just can't find a teacher, they're not near a teacher. And I meet lots of people like
that. I mean I Travel to other staes, there's lot's of people like that. Like they're
sad, there's a guy.... they're good people. If they were in a class they were cery
ewll and they cannot get a teacher. They cannot get teachings and they are very
frustrated and that's the first category. To me, the second most frustrating
category is, I call, like middle age Dharma students with, for whom nothing is
happenning. You know, like they went to Dharma classes. They didn't really try
very hard. They still are good people, they still feel atracted to the Dharma they
still feel likr they should go to Dharma classes.            But not much is really
happenning, to be honest, their lives are, their Dharma lives are fairly boring,
unproductive, they don't seem excited about it. And if you ask them, how is
your practice going? They say, "Well, I'm not doing much." Or something like
that. And you say, "What's been happenning? You know, are you different than
you were five years ago? And they say, "not really." And you saym you know,
"Did you have ay extraordinary experiences? You know, did things happen to
you?", you know. And they say, "Well you know, not really, you know." And
they seem sad, they seem lonely, they seem somehow sad. And I meet those
people too, travel alot, you know. And it's really sad to me to meet them, it's
really kind of, makes me sad to meet them. Something subtle, somekind of
under cuurent of their life is preventing them from geting the sweet things of
Dharma. You know, some, they are good people, they are trying to do their
practice. They often times their reciting all their prayers they're supposed to
recite. They go to all the important teaching they can, but something's missing
and nothing's happenning n their Dharma life and it just seems boring. And they
seem bored or, they just don't seem to have this, you know, excitement about it.
Something's missing. Something subtle obstacle is preventing them from tasting
the real sweetness of the Dharma, you know there's some kind of subtle
obstacle, and they're frustrated, and they're getting older and you feel it and it's
very frustrating. And then the last category of people that I meet is dead ones.
You know they call me to do their prayers at someones funeral and I look at
them you know, Toktok, it was a week ago. I went to , did his funeral, a friend
of mine, my age. You know, who didn't study seriously and he's dead. You
know and I get the same rotten feeling about all three, you know about people
who couldn't link up with a teacher, people who did link up, but never got
anything out ot i, or not much, and then people who, after that, they died and,
and didn... and you have this sick feeling in your heart, you feel bad, you feel
kinda rotten about it. And this is what it is, this is the thing that's blocking you,
and you don't know and you're not aware. This si the thing that's, this is the
subtle obstactle that's ruining... Master, I mean Gyaltsab Je calls it, "Unseen
obstaclt". You're not aware of it, I mean, it's an invisable obstacle. If someone
didn't explain it to you, you would never guess it. It's taking care of yourself
first, and not taking care of other people first. Okay, by the way, does that mean
that you have to give away all your money tonight, to the first beggar that
shows up? We already saind it, Master Shantideva isn't saying that. A good
bodhisattva like Khen Rinpoche, they, he gets money, he gets offerred money,
he takes it, he keeps it, he collects it, he invests it wisely, in different funds, you
know and then when he's ready. He doesn't keep anything for himself, , he
blows it all on these monks in India, you kow, he builds a new builing or, he
builds a new dormitory, or he feeds five hundred more monks or something like
that. It's not saying be irresponsible or act crazy or something like that, you
know, just, just do everything very nicely and then give it all away, take care of
other people. And that's what he does. He doesn't keep anything for himself,
his food expenses are like ten dollars a month or something, a week, it's very
amazing. You know he feeds more feeding the students who drop in, then he
does feeding his two monks and himself there, youknow. He's very, but he
takes care of everything and when the time comes, he gives it to the right place
and he gives it all away, he doesn't keep anything, and, and that's the
bodhisattva, and it means to take care of other people in a very mature,
resposible way and just really put them infront of you, put them before you. If
you don't do that, if you cannot learn that, if you don't get it, you know a certain
number of people in this room will get it. And a certain number of people will
kinda get it and a certain number of people it will go over their head and it won't
seem very important to them. If you don't get it, you'll never get enlightened.
Period. And nothing will happen in your spiritual life and you won't know why,
that's the frustrating thing. You will think that the Dharma doesn't quite work or
you will think, maybe the Tibetans did,nt quite, get it right and you'll think
maybe I should try something else, you know. It's not that. It's that your still
cherishingyourself more than other people. Try to work on it and the more you
change, the more these incredible things will start to happen in your own life.
Then he says, also in this very life, you know, somebody comes up to master
shantideva in this verse and says, "I'm not too hot on enightenment anyway, I'm
happy to be here here in samsara. Okay, so I can't get to enlightenment, so I
can't see a Tantric Angel walk in my room some night, you know. That's okay, I
can live with out it, it's alright. And then Master Shantideva gets mad and says,
"Look, stupid head, you can't even get what you want to get in this life, if you
sherish youself. Forget these high spiritual goals, if you just want financial
success, if you just want to get a good spouse, if you just want to get a nice
house, it's still the smartest thing to do is to take care of other people first, and
take care of yourself later, because even in this life, the older you get and the
more years that you take care of yourself first the less you will get what you
want. And the more you take care of other pwople and the more you do for
other people, you will get wverything
you dreamed of, financially, materially, samsarically. So he says, "You're stupid, I
don't care if you don't want to get enlightened, you still have to practice this
method, you still have to exchange yourself with others. Because you can't even
get money with out doing this, you can't even get the stocks to go the right way
if you don't do this, you can't even get a nice house in Jersey if you don't do this.
You know, even if your goal is even fo lousy as that Your still not gonna get
what you want unless you learn to exchange yourself and other people. Yeah?
You alredy has a house in New Jersey, I know, [laughs], [laughter] sorry.

student: [unclear]

You see people getting material things who obviously don't have this attitude or
don't seem to, we have to be careful. So what's going on with them? I was in
India in nineteen seventy four, three, in a tiny villiage in the Himalayan
mountains, and there's this beautiful little Christian church and I used to sneak in
there and listen to the sermons you know, on Sunday. No heat, you knkow it
was like ten degrees. People died in that villiage when I ws there, from the cold.
And, andI used to sneak in and there is this little Indian pastor giving his lecture
and hesaid, "Why do the wicked prosper?" And I'll never forget it, it was this ling
lecture about why do bad people seem to get lots of money and stuff like that.
In the bible it's called why do the wicked prosper? And I listened to hin for like
two hours and at the end I still couldn't figure out what he ws talking about and
it wasn't just is accent, you know. I mean I was, I was like I still don't get it, it still
doesn't make sense. In Buddhism it makes perfect sense, I mean, they were very
generous in the past life. They took care of other people in their past life.
According to Buddhism, nothing else can produce weath. No matter how much
someone is getting rich, no matter how crumby they seem to be and how selfish
they seem to be, the wealth was created in the past by their generousity to
someone else and it could have bee a long time ago and other kinds of mental
afflictions could be clouding them since then and there's no contradiction there.
Can you prove it? No. Not right away, if you study karma, if you go to the
California teachings at the end of August, starting at Vadjrapani Institute....no. If
you understand karma well and you nderstand emptiness well, then it will be
clear to you , that that's where it's coming from. Karma is not just an excuse that
the Buddhists made up to explain the world and the more that you study it the
better you can accept it, but it takes time. It takes time. I think that particularely
it is hard to understand how karma is almost like collected in your subconcious.
And hoe it comes out in the form of how you see the world. I mean, if you
understand that point, you can accept karma. So that's his shpeal on problems
that you cannot see and that you would never be aware of. I mean people don't
go around saying, "I didn't get my promotion at work, because I didn't take care
of other people first. You don't hear that in the world. You don't hear the
following statement in the world, Oh, I screwed up that promotion, I could have
been the VP if I had only made sure that everybody else was vp first. You
know, you don't hear them saying that. You hear them saying the opposite.
The way to get to be vp is to make sure that everybody else gets there first. It
really is and it's so radical, that people can't see it. It's never something that you
could come up with on your own if you were left to yourself with out a Buddhist
teacher. And, and you would never guess that small little incidents of taking care
of yourself, like pouring your tea first, eating the last Cheerios in the box,
yourself. You know, taking the last peice of Two Boots pizza, you know. You
wouldn't gueaa that things lke that are not why you aren't seeing Tantric Deities
and stuff like that. You wouldn't guess it. These are unseen problems of
cherishing yourself before other people. Yeah?

student: [unclear]

She asked a good question, It seems like doing the right things because you kow
that you'll come out ahead in the lond run, karmically, is also selfish and not
taking care of others. I mean is there a place where cherishing others, because
you know that it's the best way to get ahead yourself is also selfish and not
taking care of others. I mean, is there a place where cherishing others because
you know it's the best way to get aead yourself becomes self cherishing? And
yeah, you have to be careful with it, you have to be very careful with it. But
don't ever lose the vision of what Bodhichitta means.            The definition of
bodhichitta? {Sembkye pani shendun chir yangdak dzokpey jang chub du},
okay. The definition of bodhichitta is that, "I should reach Pasradise myself first,
so that I can teach other people how to do it., you know. So it's a paradox, it's
kind of a beautiful thing. The best thing that you can do for other people is the
best thing that you can do for yourself. And wouldn't it be typical of Buddhism
that is came out that way. And by the way, the most pleasant, physically
pleasure thing that you can do adn mentally pleasure thing that you can do, is
practice Dharma exactly the way the books say. I mean if you want physical
pleasure and you want mental pleasure, and I'm talking straight, pure, grosso,
physical pleasure, if you really want that. The smartest way to do it is to practice
Dharma perfectly. And you will not be able to escape it. It's kind of interesting,
it's very interesting. what Ii'm saying is that the best thing that you can do for
other people is to reach extasy for yourself. With the intention to give it to them
when you know how. That's, that's it, it's not a contradiction. And it's not
cherishing yourself. Cherishing yourself is stupid, ignorant, dumb state of mind
that says, if I struggle against the other people at work, I'll get to be vice
president, you know. It's not like that. The way to get to be vice president is to
give it away as much as you can. If you keep giving away all your positions,
you'll keep getting beter ones, it's really weird. {Dewa chungna chapa yi, dewa
chenpo tong mi si}, Sakyapandita, twelve hundreds, you know, "The best way to
get bliss is to give away your small happinesses." And it works, it really works,
keep giving away positions, it's weird, it's really weird. Every time you get in a
competition for a job make sure that the other guy gets it and you'll end up
being his boss or you'l own the company or something like that. It's really
weird, it works okay? Aright, Hector, go ahead.

Hector: "Let the fire go"

Every single harm that comes in this entire world, very fear that comes, and so
too any pain that ever comes, comes from grasping to myself, what use for me
then is this? The single greatest demon. Untill the day that that give up your
very self, you'll not be able to stop your suffering. Untill the day that you let go
of fire, you will not be able to stop your hand from burning."
Gyaltsab je categorizes this verse in "Problems of self cherishing that you can
see" and problems taht are going to come to you directly and you don't have to
worry where they came from. you can figure it out directly. And he makes the
statement that every single pain in the world, very radical statement. Every
single problem of every single problem in the world, physical or mental has
been caused by this. Has been caused by taking care of youself first. Has been
caused by cherishing yourself. And it's very radical. He says, that every single
people in the world, physical or mental, has ben caused by this. Has been caused
by taking care of yourself first. Has been caused by cherishing yourself and it's
very radical. He's saying that every physical and every mental sufferring in the
rest of the worl is caused by this. There's people who come to me sometimes
and say, "It seems like Buddhism is not very socially concerned, you know. You
don't seem to work very hard, you don't have Buddhis soup kitchen in the East
Viliage, you know you don't you're not woking in Bosnia, you don't see, you
know, Tibetan monks from India wandering around Bosnia bandaging people
up or, or you don't see Buddhist monks in Africa handing out food or things like
that." And, and His Holiness has rightly pointed out that that's a weakness, you
know in our Buddhist practice. That if we were good Buddhists, real Buddhists,
you probably would see Buddhist monks all over the world helping people like
that. But you have, you have to, if you're very cae ful about it and you think
very carefully about it, this is where all the sufferring in Africa came from, this is
where all the wars that are going on right now came from. This is were all the
refugees in the world have been created from. If you understand Buddhism, and
it's notbeeing, it's not avoiding your social resposibilites to say, "This is the real
problem, this, what you see, the hunger in the world, the wars in the world, the
AIDS, the tuberculosis, the other problems in the world, they they are really
created by this, honestly this is where they really come from. And, adn really, if
you were going, if you understood Buddhism very clearly, if you meditated
very, very well, you would see that his is the main enemy. If Buddhists ever
organized some kind of world releif fund, it would propably go into trying to
train people not to have self cherishing, it's very interesting. Does that mean that
you can avoid those other social things? Not at all, I mean I think its very, very
suspicious when a person says, "I'm working on stamping out my cherishing
myself, so I don't have time to help other people. You know, it seems very
suspicious to me, you know. I, I tend to, I tentd to, in my own life I've seen that
the monks and the practitioners that are doing well, are also taking care of other
people in plain old ways like, bedding, food, housing, medical care, like that.
They're doing both. To me, it's very suspicious if you say, "I'm just helping
people with their self cherishing atitude, I don't have to help people physically."
That's suspicious, but on the other handthis really is the souce of every single
physical misery in the world, is, is the karma od taking care of yourself first, it
really is. Yeah?

student: [unclear]

What about the Hinayana monks in, in vietnam who burned them selve? That's
a long story. You know, it'svery difficult to talk about. Just to give it a straght,
like if I was in a debate ground, you know, we would discuss the pros and cons.
The first Buddhis sin is what? It's taking life and, adn suicide is concidered taking
life and the normal result of suicide is to drop immediately to one of the lowest
hells. You know, the karma of killing youself, you know, it's ironic, my brother
committed suicide so I,, I thingka bout it allot. The karma of kiling yourself is
that you, you, your last act ws out of anger or frustration or destructiveness,
your thought, your final thought in this life which is the one that activates your
nect karma, you see it's the one that mainly decides your next birth is by
definiton something very, very destructive and evil and those people almost
alway go to hell. It's a very, very serious bad deed, suicide. And on the other
hand, and also your body is very, very precious, you know, if you hold out. You
know, if you take care of it properly, it can get you to Paradise wthin this life. So
Master Shamtideva is going to say later on in this chapter, you know, "The body
ssucks, but listen, take good care of it, it can get you to enlightsnment. Take,
take, you know, very cold good care of it, you know. Don't get involved with it
but take good care of it. On the other hand, I have to think that the motivation
of burning your own body to protest war has to be an extremely noble
mmotivation. I mean, the motivation at that moment, had to be extremely
noble. And I have to think that from the point of veiw of motivation it was a
very, very wonderful action and a cery sweet action and so, you have to balnce
those two. We don't know what their motivation was, really at that moment.
But to give up your life to protest war seems to be a very great deed. Aside
from doing it that way. yeah?

student: [unclear]

She mentiones that Shakyamuni Buddha, in his previous body as food for a
tigress and that's true, but actually, if you read the story, which is in the {Serey
dampey do}, {Suvannah prabas sutra}, and we read it, this was the beggining of
these classes.I think, up on the west side at a, at a Kagyupa center. The reason he
gives up his body and His motivations at that moment was what? Was it to feed
the tigress? Was it to feed an animal? No. It was very interesting, he wanted
these five people to become his first five disciples when he became the buddha
and so he's thinkng, it's just kind of a trick to create this karmaic connection with
them that they have to be his first five disciples and they did, they were. You
know, those sages who he taught those Four Noble Truths to , at the
begginning, were the, in ther past lives they were this tigress and her cubs. So I
think that he had a really extraordinary motivation at that moment. It wasn't
just to feed them. His last words at that moment were, hey you. you're gonna
be my student when I get to be enlightened you know, and then he gave his
body to the tigress. Okay, yeah?

student: [unclear]

Marvin says, the fact that many people charge so much for retreats at so many
Buddhist Dharma centers seems to be that they are waching out for themseves.
Trust me, I am not aware of any center in the United States that is breaking even,
I'm not, I am really not and I don't care what tradition you're talking about or
anything. They don't cover their costs, you know, they don't cover their costs,
don't worry, we're all broke, Okay. ANd we're being very good Buddhists, you
know, [laughter] Okay, don't worry. Then he says, he compares this to
something. Say, {me},[repeat], {ma tang na}, [repeat], {sekpa}, [repeat], {pong mi
nu}, [repeat]. {Me}, [repeat], {matang na}, [repeat], {sekpa}, [repeat], {pong mi
nu}, [repeat]. {Me}, means "fire". Fire like a coal, a burning coal, a burning coal.
Like a what do they call those? Brickette. like out of a barbecue thing out in
suburbia New Jersey, when they're burening those steaks next door. {Me},
{matangna} means, "If you don't let go", like if you stand there, it's a real serious
image It's not an exageration. Master Shantideva says, "Try to imagine one of
those people reaching into one of those barbecue things, a hibachi, right, and,
and grabs this coal and is standing there, "Ahhhh!", and you say, let go, let go,
and they are like, "Noooo!". And you're like, "Stupid, just drop it.", you know.
And they're like, "Nooo, and it hurts so bad." [laughs] I mean, imagine, it's like a
terrible image. I mean allot of the images in the [b:Bodhisattvacharyavater] are
like, are very frightening. But it's some crazy guy who's screaming fom the pain
of burning his hand cause he's got this ot coal that he's grasping, and you're
saying, "Sykes, let it go, just drop it." And your like, "No, I can't let it go and it
really hurts." You know, just drop it. And he says, {me matangna}, "if you don't
drop it", {sekpa}, means, "burning", that burning of your hand. {Pong mi nu}
means. "you will never be able to stop it". So to translate it into plain old English,
"If you don't let go of that burning not coal, you'll never be able tostop the, the
pain that it gives you." The burning hot coal in term of what our life is all about
is taking care of yourself first. The coal is {rang che ndzin}. Up here, okay. "The
burning hot coal", says Master Shantideva is the habit, is the temdency of taking
care of yourself first. And ironically what? people...? They won't give it up, thay
won't let it go. They think that it''s in their own interest not to give it up. They're
like this guy with the coal, you know, "I gotta hold it, i gotta hold it. This makes
me happy, you know." And ironically, that's what's causeingall of their suferring
and ironically, they refuse to drop it and then thy are atnding there, "Life is so
bad, you know I'm getting ld youknow, I lost mu job, I can't find a place to stay
youknow, life is terible.' And you say, "Just let go of it and you'll find out."
Butthey're afraid and they won't let go. Nad they keep looking out for
themselves. And the more that you worry about yourself, the less you will get
the things that you want. It's very ironic, it's very, very ironic. Try to, try to put
a creack in it. In Tibetan they say, {realwa}. Try to rip it a little bit. And then try
to do something for other people first and then step back and see what happens.
You know, see if there is aything that comes out of it and if you don't do that and
you continue to let taht r=tendancy grow, as you get older , it gets harder. You
know, older people are generally more selfish than younger people. You know,
as you get older this habit seems to get more and more ossified, ossified? In your
brain [laughter]. Your brain starts to get harder and harder and harder and you
meet these old, whiey people, like in nursing homes, just sceaming for someone
to help them and the people are jst abusing them, because they are too old to
matter any more and the mind has gotten very very selfish and very very hard
by that time and it's impossible for then to change then. Before you get to old
then, switch it around, start taking care of other people, it will make your life
extremely happy, okay? Extremely happy. That's all and he calls the tendency to
grasp, the tendency to grasp, the tendency to cherish yourself he call the greatest
devil in the world, the greatest demon in the world. That's the, that's the demon
that's ruining the happiness of the entire world, okay. Okay, go ahead, I think
thirty one? Both verses, please.

Hector: "The Master and the Servant."

It's something very wrong to look with eyes belonging t another and work for
only my own goals. It's wrong as well to look for eyes working for them and to
do something that's not right. Therefore, I should make all other people first
priority and anything that I ever find upon my person I should take away from
me and seek some way to make a use of it for other people."

There's this experience, when you have the actual experience of getting
bodhicahiit, ths whole chapter. goal of the chapter, the goa; is to reach the direct
experience of bodhichitta. The goal is at some time in your life you have your
first direct experience of seeing bodhichitta. I maen, it's very similiar to seeing
emptiness directly. I mean it's very, very rare. it's extremely rare and it has all of
its very specific content to that experience. And it's, and it's extremely, like it's
monumental. If any one person, in this room, before they died, could really get
bodhichitta in their mind, it would be an extraordinary result of all the work that
we've ever done.        And when you have this feeling you have the direct
knowledge that you will spend the rest of your life helping other people. I mean
you are very directly aware that every waking moment n your life, from now
on, you will spend in the service of other people and at that moment it's like
decidingthat you will be a salve for the entire world for the rest of your life, you
know. Anything they want you will provide. And they have this direct {tsema},
{pramana}, "knowlede", that this is the way that you will spend the rest of your
life. You will dedicateyour life, for the rest of your life, every waking moment,
to doing something to help out other people. Especially with the Dharma. And
you have this very sacred, sweet, experience and knowledge of it. And from
that moment on, and by the way, you can do it, {brangi shing tabur}, means that
youcan fake this attitude and you are encouraged to. In all the scriptures it says,
"Untill the day that that happens that's all very rare , Let's all pretend that we
have this attitude. Imagine what it would be like to say, "All my money, all my
time, all my life all my breath, all my efforts, everything I have I dedicate tyo
other people, I am your servant. Whatever you want I will give you. Crumby
little happiness like a job, a Starbucks latte, you know up to Nirvana and
Buhahood. You know, train you to reach those things. I'll give you anything
you want, this is all I want in my life is to give you those things, okay And, and,
and if, it happens to you, I mean you can pretend, you can fake it, right. And
then after that time you can imagine it, right/ And then after that time you're in
trouble, right? After that time you have a problem. That everything you own
belongs to other people.         You're borrowing everything, okay.           Master
Shantideva says, "Think of your self as a slave or as a servant in the house of
some very rich guy and everything else is his, including you, Your body you,
your time your mind, your arms, your legs your head and your clothes and
your room and all your money, all the chairs in the room. Everything belongs
to somebody else. The bodhisattva goes around the world thinking, 'I don't own
any of this stuff, I don't even own my own time, I don't even own my life. You
know, this is, I've already promised, I've already sworn. There's all there's all
these beutiful texts in Buddhism that say, "From this day on, you own me, you
know, do with me whatever you want, I'm your servant, everything I own is
yours." And then it's very sweet feeling from then on, ou just go around the
world, thinking fom then on, I'm borrowing this, this robe, this cloth youknnw,
some sentient being has worked realy ahrd to make this cloth and I'l kep it untill
somebody needs it. By the way, monks can't give away their robes very easily.
That's a, that's in the, that for emergencies only, okay. But what I'm sayng is that
anything that I iwn, I don't own anymore. I mean at a certain point, when you
take bodhisattva vows like that, forget it, you've already given it away. {Shen la
ngupa} mean, "You've already dedicated ot to other people. you'don't own that
other stuff anymore. If they need it, {rang gi lunna trok}, Master Shantideva
says, "Rip it off your body, steal it from you." It's like, 'No, no, I like these socks.
"No, sorry you can't keep them." "No, no but I like these socks, you know how
hard it is to get red socks?" "Sorry, sorry, they're not yours, they belong to other
people. Take them off your body." you know, this is you talking to your own
body. You know, "Sorry, we have to," what's the word when they take your
apatment away? "We have to reposses these socks." You know, re posses, these
socks are owned by other sentient beings and this monk in the monastery
doesn't have a pair of socks and you can go back to America without any socks
on. We're repossessing what we already own, you're not giving it away. you,
you already dedicated it to other peoole. The socks don't belong to you rip it off
your body. Tell your body, "Sorry, sorry guy, time to give the socks away."
And you have to steal them from, the word {trok} is the word that's used in Tibet
for muggers, it's what they do to you. It's a very specific, it's not steal, it's like rip,
forcefully rip, forcefully rip something away from you. It's like, what do you
call, a hand, a bag snatcher, purse snatcher. That's called {trok}, {trok}, means,
"you have to go up to your body and say, "Look, I know you've got twenty
dollars, that person needs twenty dollars, hand it over." You know, [laughs] and
you have to. because it's theirs, they're just taking back what you already gave
them. They're, they are , what do you call? Thet're coming and collecting what
you already promised. So be careful, you take bodhisattva vows you're in
trouble. You know, you pretend to be a bodhisattva you're gonna have to act
like this. your time too, and personally my time is the hardest thing to give up.
If they need your time you give it to them. They own it already, you have to
give it to them. You already agreed, you signed the, you din't read the small
print when you took those bodhisattva vows. You know, they own your time.
Somebody calls in the chips, you have to put up, or shut up and you don't own
those things, Master shantideva says. And he says, also in this verse, "Don't look
funny at these people when they make demands on you." You know, don't go
to the phone thinking, "Oh, no she's phoning again." He says, "Don't make faces,
because you're making faces at your owner, you're making faces at your Master.
You knw, you swore you'd be their slave for the rest of your life. So, what kind
of, good kind of slave would look at their master, you know, like that. You
know, {mig lok te}. means, "You can't even look at them with a little bit of
irritation, you know how you look at somebody like.." You know how someone
bumps you in the subway and you're like, you know. youkow how there's this
way of saying certain things with your eyes on the subway,[laughter] right. He
says, "Bodhisattvas have to stop that." Why? They own your body, what are
you doing giving them this look? They own the subway. They own, you move.
You know, you go around, they own you. You know, if you're their sevant you
don't look at your master who owns your body and your clothes and your kids
and your legs and your arms, you don't look at them like that. That's in this
verse, that's the meaning of this verse, okay. Okay, one more,

Hector: "The exchange of yourself and others."

Make those who are lower than you and so on, to be yourself, make you then
none other than the others, practice then, with this state of mind that's free of
ideas, the feelings of jelousy, competitiveness and pride."

Okay, we're gonna discuss bodhisattvaa schitzophrenia. The actual method of
how to exhcange yourself and others and this gets very shitzophrenic. Okay, I
remember when Rinpoche taought this, I remember taking weeks to, I
remember Rinpoche getting stuck sometimes, figuring out, this is w whole
section in this chapter, very, very sweet, where you start exchanging yourself
with others. You put your brain in Hectors head and then youlook at Michael,
and then it gets very confusing, I him, but he's looking at me, but I'm who he's
looking at ans I'm looking at him and, and it gets all confusing. These verses are
very difficult to translate. Very difficult to translate and you start to get very
confused about who's talking, or who's, who's. And I think that's on purpose, I
think Master Shantideva is trying to confuse us and youfeel like a shcitzophrenic.
You know, I put myself in Tessies brain, I look at myself standing up here
teaching. And I look at myself standing up here teaching, and she's looking at
me and having certain thoughts, but it's me looking at me and she's evaluating
herself, I mean myself, I mean me, I mean you, I mean I'm, and it gets really
weird, it gets really cool. Oh let's make her think the way I think about her.
Okay, how's that? Master Shantideva says, well, to answer that, how do I think
about her? I have to evaluate her level. Is she, where is that? Say, {towa},
[repeat], {nyamba}, [repeat], {memba}, [repeat]. Those of you who are taking
Tibetan, fourth coulumn, nasal, high tone due to the? Prefix letters, okay, last
two, {towa}, [repeat], {nyamba}, [repeat], {memba}, [repeat]. {Towa}, means,
"superior to you", higher than you. Okay, how do I feel about Tessie? Well, first,
I evaluate her, is she better than me, is she the same as me? Or is she lower than
me? That's how she starts, Master Shantideva is saying, "You do thids as soon as
you meet somebody." You are already evaluating them, you are sticking them
in one of the three categories. "Is this person better than me? Is this person the
same as me or is this person worse than me?" The minute anyone of us meets
another person we are already, we are quickly throwing them into some box of
better thamn me, my peer, or worse than me. 'That's your first thought, one of
your first thoughts", he says, is that you categorize them according to where are
they compared to you? {Towa} means "higher", {nyamba} means, "equal",
{memba} means, "lower". If they are higher you get? Say {trak dok}, [repeat],
{track dok}, [repeat], {track dok} means "jealousy". If they're better than you,
you get jealous right away, okay and then you start getting jealous, okay.
Natural human reaction. If they are better of you, you start getting jealous of
them. If they have something that you didn't get, you start getting jealous of
them. You would like to start getting more time with this person, they start
getting more time with this person than you, okay? {Trakdok}, you know, "I gat
jealous." You start getting jealous, this is {trakdok}. Automatic reaction, by the
way, I'm trying to decide, I'm trying to analyze how I automatically think of any
person that I meet. [cut]....by your past deeds, okay. Depending about,
depending precisely on how good or bad you have been...[cut] you can sit there
in the dentist's chair all you want and think that it's a...[cut]...how does it feel,
Michael Roach? When Tessie sits over there and says, if he's better that me, I'm
gonna get jealous of him. How does it feel? Okay, very difficult, this part of the
chapter is very difficult. I'm Jay, Jay is looking at me, but I'm him and so, I'm
looking at Michael Roach and saying, "Oh, Michael Roachknows more Tibetan
than me, jealous, jealous, of him. Gets more attention in the class, jealous of him.
And thenI'm practicing being me in your head. I'm, I'm, I'm putting my mental
afflictions in your head and I'm looking at Michael Roach and saying, "I'm jealous
of you." Who's who? Me, what do you mean? me, Michael Roach in Jays head,
is being jealous of me. Okay, you got it? Schitzophrenia, very interesting. This is
{dak chen nyamje}, this is the, you're playing with your mind. You put yourself
out in that persons eyes and then you look at yourself. It's very difficult, okay.
What about {nyamba}? What about {nyamba}? Let's do {dren sem}. Say, {dren
sem}, [repeat], {dren sem}, [repeat]. {Dren}, means to compete with somebody.
{Dren} means, "To compete with somebody. And {sem} is "That kind of attitude,
that state of mind. You can all it competitiveness, okay. Competing with
somebody. If you meet a person that is better than you, you get jealous. If you
meet a person who is on the same level as you, you start to try to compete with
them, you know, "I can do that better." Like that. You strt to get competitive
with them, and that's what happens if you meet somebody who is equal to you.
If you meet somebody who is lower than you, you get, say, {nga gyel}, [repeat],
{nga gyel}, [repeat]. {Nga gyal} means what?
students: [unclear]

Pride, how do you break it down? Yeah, {nga}, mean, "I", and {gyel}, means
"king". The word in tibetan for pride, is "I'm the king". So {ngaglye}, youu get
{ngagyel} towards people wheo are lower. You're like, "Oh,"Who cares about
them? I'm much better, I don't even have to worry about you, i don't even have
to feel competitive towards you, they're never gonna get good Tibetan. Then
they strt getting good Tibetan, and your like, "Oh man, I better wok harder,
they're catching up to me." And then they get better than you. "Ohhh." You
start getting jealous. Now the idead is, in the bodhisattva shcitzophrenia
practice, I put my brain in Tessies mind and I look at Michael Roach and I get to
feel what it fees like if all the people around me had the same kind odf mind that
i have. Meaning that everrybody in this room is evaluating michael Roach. And
every body is thinking, "If he's equal to me, I better compete with him, if he's
better than me, I'm gonna be lower than you, If you are lower than me, I'm
going to have pride about you. In any case, Michael Roach loses", okay? I'm
putting my mind in your head. I'm putting my brain in your skull, and I'm
looking at Michael Roach with the same sick mind that I have. How does it feel
to be Micheal Roach with all these five, eighty people looking at you, and feeling
either jealousy or, or pride or competitiveness. What would the worl be like if
every body in this room was as sick as Michael Roaches mind. I mean, what
would it be like? Think about it. This is exchanging yourself and others, this is a
negative, it's very interesting, yousee this is exchanging yourself and others.
How would you like to live in a world where every body is as selfish as you are?
Think about it. You know. Put your mind in their brains and then look at
Michael Roach, I mean, it feels pretty bad. You know, the whole room is... if you
were thinking like I do, and I put my if we did this big brain transplant, you
know and everybody got my brain, this room wuld be extremely
uncomfortable. I wouldn't even want to be standing up here, you know, if you
all had my mind and you were looking at me and I had to feel the vibrations of a
whole room full of people who can't rejoice in what I do. Whi can't love me for
who I am, good or bad. You know, who can't feel compassion for me if I'm
lower and can't feel respect for me if I'm higher, but if you all felt towards me,
the way that I feel towards you, which is either, pride, competitiveness or
jealously, my life would be, my life would be hell. It's very interesting, Master
Shantideva is saying, that if my mind is so screwed of that if we did this huge
brain transplant, and everybody in this room is thinking the way that I'm
always thinging about other people it would be hell to stand up here and look
into eighty-five pairs of eyes and all of them thinking, "How could I get this guy?
How could I get as good as him? How could I get better than him? Oh, he's just
a plain old shmuck. You know, I mean how would it be to sit here if everybody
in the room had my favourite mental afflictions? And he says, "Think about it."
This is exchanging yourself and others. Very, very interesting practice. Take
your favourite mental afflicions, pretend that everyone else in the room had
them, towards you, and see what it feels like, because that what it feels like to
them, when you do them. Okay, that's how it feels to them when you're having
these, imagine how it feels, get into your own mind. Imagine what it would feel
like to sit in a room of eighty five Michael Rroaches on a bad day, being jealous,
feeling pride or trying to get me, you know, imagine...[cut]

...being jealous, feeling pride or trying to get me, you know, imagine how
unpleasant that would be so stop it, that's the point, stop it. Stop doing that,
imagine how sick it would be, imagin a whole room full of Michael Roach minds
on a bad day, being jealous of me. This room would feel charged with some
kind of mental affliction. You know, like we get little flavours of mental affliction
that floats around the room from time to time, but imagine if everybody was
having the kind of jealousy that I was having last week, towards you, towards
me. Put put my jealousy in your mind and then you look at me with those eyes
that I had last week, see how it feels, and it's like ahhh, you know, you know.
Did you have a question? Yeah, it's hard, do you got it? That's schitzophrenia,
okay, that's the first schitzophrenia, okay.        Oh, there's absolutely healthy
competition, yeah, like when Sera Mey monastery wipes out Sera Je monastery
in a debate, that's no problem, as we always do. [laughter] Okay, one more
thing before the break, there's a, there's bodhisattva in our midst, and she's this
incredible lady and ever since the first day she came into this class, she's been a
joy, to be with her. I mean, one of the few people that I can say the from the
very first moment she walked into this class, it was a joy to have her here. And,
and she would not get out of my life or the other peoples lives, because she is
always serving you.        And every moment she is bringing you something
beautiful, doing something beautiful for you. She is very busy, she, she works
for the government of her country. She is very,very busy, she has a full time
job, she has more than a full time family and she was always here volunteering,
she was always here helping out, she was always slipping money to people and
always just being a really fine person. Now this stupid government of Brazil has
decided to transfer her to Western Canada, which is really bad and we tried
letter writing, but that didn't work, it's a law of Brazilian law or something like
that. But I wanted to just honour Maria Theresa and we have a big cake in the
back and if you can quit that job and come back or something, we can work it
out okay, really, we can do one of those green card tricks that we can do for
some people,so. So serious offer, we really want you to come back okay, we
really miss you, okay so we would like to thank her for that now. [clapping]
[laughs] And we kidnapped her family also, they're in the back, so please have a
nice break and there is a nice cake for you in the back. I think that was all done
by, allot of that was done by Ani Pelma ans other assistants who's names I'm not
sure. [clapping] [cut]

Okay, Hector, go ahead. Thirty three all four and a half, three and a half verses,
okay.

Hector: "Bodhisattva talking to yourself."

"This one should receive the honour but not us. We should never get the things
he always does. He should bask in praise and we should be belittled. He should
have all the happiness and us the suffering. We should be the ones who have to
do all the work and he should sit in perfect leisure. Through out the world he
should become a great man and we should stay inferior and be known as
knowing nothing. What's the use of having good qualities? We'll all strive that
they have them all. There do exist those who, there do exist those compared to
whom this one is low. There are also do exist those compared to whom we're
highest. The state of our morality, veiw, troubles and the rest are forced by
afflictions and not by choice."

Okay, this is a continuation of bodhisattva schitzoprenia, okay, very hard to
translate. I think I got it right, okay. I think I got it right, okay. You're putting
your brain in all other people brains and they are looking at you and they are
gonna think like you. So every body in this room, I put my mind in your heaf
and then I look through your eyes at me, okay. And I an going to say exactly
what I used to think towars you, usually. But now you're gonna think it about
me becuse I put my mind in your brain. Yeah.

student: [unclear]

We are going to do some projective identification, okay. This one shoul get all
the honour, but not us, okay, you know, everybody should say, "Oohh, what a
great teacher he is", you know. And we should all just be stupid little people and
every body should just honour him and ignore us, got it?

student: No.

I'm putting my mind in your heads and I'm looking at me. And you're looking
at me the way that you're looking at you and you're saying, oh Micael Roach,
nobody should care... oh sorry, I'm getting confused. My mind, I'm thinking
about me from your point of veiw, but I'm thinking what I usually think in my
mind about me. It's hard to translate, I'm telling you, but I thinkI got it right,
okay, that's a {mayin got}. So you're looking at me and saying, Michael Roach
should be, every one should bring him flowers, everyone should get down on
their kness to him, everybody should stand up when he walks in. And
everybody should tell him what a great teacher he is, you know, and I should
continue to be anonymous, because that's what I want. That's what Michawl
Roach really wants, got it? Okay? Got it? It's a little hard. Imagine if the whole
room were saying, imagine if the whole room agreed with what you really
want, okay, imagine if everybody in this room agreed with what's really in your
heart that you want. Then how would you act. "Oh, Micheal Roach, anything
good that any one says, you can have it all and we'll just be stupid, cause that'a
what you really want, right. So okay, we'll agree with you, you know, for the
rest of your life we will give you all the flowers we will always bow down to
tyou , we'll always tell you what a geat teacher you are and all of us will just be
obscure and anonymous, okay?, Cause that's what you really want Mr.
Bodhisattva, isn't it?" Okay, how's that? Hard, it's hard okay. That's exchanging
yourself and other, it's like schitzo... projective, yeah. [laughs] Okay, got it? One
more time. Because it's what I really want, is that I should get all the honour in
this room and that no one else should get any, which, I work so hard right?
What if every body in this room suddenly agreed with me? It would be kind of
scary, you know. "Okay, Michael Roach, you know, you can have al the honour,
every body in this room will think you're the greatest you knowand we'll just be
little old sentient beings, ignored, the way that you treat us, usually." "And we'll
slip into obscurity while your name gets plastered all over Mandala magazine
and stuff like that, that's what you want. You know we'll write the article for you,
we'll call the peoplw at the New York Times and we'll just be plain old shmucks
and we'll make sure that your name get's out, okay? Okay, you got it." You
know that's, got it, so do that. [laughter] [laughs] You're already doing that.
That's {koorti}, {koorti}, means, "honour", you know, honour. Giving people
flowers, you know, getting peoples respect paid to you. Number two, {nyepa},
{nyepa} means, high tone, right, fourth column, nasal head letter, right Pelma.
Strong, {nyepa}, okay, {nyepa} means, things, you know. Okay so you decide,
any time any one wants to make a donation it should be to Michael Roach fund,
okay? And any time andy has a free day, he should be mailing something at my
house, and like that, you know, I should get everything. And if we really
exchanged me and you and if you really decided to think like me. You would all
be saying, "Us, we shouldn't get anything, you know, no one in this room should
ever offer anything to anyone else, everything should flow to Michael Roach,
you knowbecause that is what you really want, right Michael Roach?" Okay, this
is, got it, that's the schitzophrenia. That's number two. Pardon me?

student: [unclear]

Yeah, {nyepa} means things. {Koorti} and {nyepa} are normally, the two things
that a Dharma teacher has to watch out for. {Koorti} is like, "Oh thank you, so
wonderful, such and such a good class". {Nyepa} means people actually offerring
you physical things, you know, flowers, moner houses, things like that. And a
Dharma teacher has to be very, very careful and sensitive about these two
objects, it can deteriorate into that, you know. Say {tupa}, [repeat], {tupa},
[repeat]. {Tupa}, means "praise", praise. So if I exchange my mind into your
mind, just to fantasize, right, "Oh, Michael Roach, you're the greatest, you're so
wonderful, you're such a nice Lama. We won't talk good about any body else,
you would probably get jealous, right?" [laughter] "So we'll just talk good about
you, we won't ever praise Art Engle or anybody else who is a good teacher. You
know, we'll just concentrate on you and you'll get all the praise, cause that's what
you want, right?"           So sentient beings, we're very co-operative, we're
bodhisattvas, we exchanged, right? So we'll take care of you, we'll make sure
that you are the only one that gets talked good about in this room. And that's
{Tupa}, it's hard, it's kind of hard to imagine, right? But it's what you really want,
right? Say, {dewa}, [repeat], {dewa}, [repeat]. "Oh, Michael Roach you know all
the happiness in this room wil be yours, youkow, who cares about such and such
a student is having a hard time with their deppression? Or their anxiety? Or
they can't get a job. we'll just make sure that you are happy, you know. And
don't come to the phone when they need you adn don't meet them at a
restaurant cause you'd rather be translating the next course. Make sure you're
happy try not to thinkabout, you know, don't worry Michael Rooach, we'll all
get by, you know we'll have our depressions, we'll have our anxietys, well get
sick and you won't show up, but we just want to make sure you're happy. Okay,
so just everybody in this room decide I should be happy all the time and we'll all
just struggle by, by ourselves and you won't help us any and we'll do it that way,
okay." This is likethe frightening thing of getting what you always wanted,
right, okay. I mean that's really what you want in your heart you're really, really
concerened that you should be happy and you know that some other student is
haveing a really bad time, really bad depression, having a realy nasty life and
you don't even have ten minutes for them. Youknow.                    This would be
exdhanging self and others youkow if the whole world thought the way that I
want them to think, they'd all be saying, "oh Michael Roach of you have a little
cold, we'll all come over and give you medicine." In the mean time, so and so is a
bout to commit suicide, so and so is avout ready to jup off a bridge, but we want
to make sure that you are okay with your little cold so we'll all come over with
flowers and vitamins and other stuff, and just ignore these other people, that's
what you want right?" Okay, number five, say, {ley mepay dawa}, {ley},
[repeat], {mepey}, [repeat], {dewa}, [repeat], {ley }, [repeat], {dewa, [repeat]. This
is, there were two {dewa's} so I just wrote an extra phrsase on number five to
distinguish it from nomber four, {Ley mepa} means, "nothing to do", no work.
{Dewa}, means, "bliss". This is like having whole room full of Jampa lumericks.
If you know Jampa down in New Jersey, "Oh Michael Roach, don't worry, we'll
make the tea, we'll wash the dishes, we'll run to the printer and get the thing
printed for class, you know, you relax, you're tired. You had a hard day and
you're our teacher and you work so har, you, you just sit there, we'll take care of
everything, you know, you need us to run these stupid errands, you kow we'll
do that, you're suc a nice guy, you sit there and relax. If you want to take anap,
take a nop, if you want a brownie, we'll go out and buy you a brownie, we know
you like those kind of fruit shakes fom Micheal and Zoes andd, and you relax
and, we'll run around and do a; the dirty work and all the grnt work and all the
gopher eork and we'll drive all the car to the class and you don't have to do
anything and you just sit there. You don't ahve to do anyhting you just relax.
That's what you want, that's what your mind wants. And this is, this is tis
fantasising of a bodhisattva switch. What if the whole worl reallly started to act
that way? It's kind of scary, that's what you really want, okay. Okay, number
six, {trakpa}. {Trakpa}, {trakpa} means fame. "You're name will get big we'll
make sure that we're doing videos of you, we'll make sure that there is lots of
tapes of you, we'll make sure that your translations get printed up and sent all
over the place, and we'll credit you, we'll make sure that every body knows
Geshe Michael, Geshe Michael, you know don't worry we'll take care of
everthing and you sit there and do your half baked translations and stuff and
we'll make sure that you get famous, you know, we'll send in stuff to Mandala
magazine and , you know. I ean, what if the whole world started to act that
way? How would it feel? And this is where you swich youself, you think that
the whole world really thinks the way that you think and it would be horrible. It
would be some kind of disaster, you kow it would be kinda sick, right. And
Shantideva is trying to make a point here, he's trying to be sarcastic, what if all
you're fondest dreams came true? It would be pretty uncomfortable. And it
would be pretty weird, but that's what you want isn't it, and that's what you
think about when we say exchanging youself and others, alright. Okay, kinda
tricky. Okay, Hector, next one.
Hector: "Don't hurt us by hurting yourself."

"You must care for us by using all your strength and we should too, willingly
take all sufferring. Are we not though some one you chould care for? Why is it
that you belittle us so. What use would we ever have for the qualities tha the
has, and he is a being of qualities, he lives in the savage jaws of the lower births,
he has no compassion for living beings, even worse his delusions that he
posesses higher qualities, pollutes the wise, it's agreed. "

This is again a kind of switching and all sentient beings are looking at you, okay.
You're suposes to be Joe Bodhisattva, right? And all sentient beings are looking
at you and saying, hey, aren't you Joe Bodhisattva? You say, "Yeah, yeah, I go to
all of the bodhisattva classes, I did all my homwork, I got a ninety eight average,
you know, I'm, I'm big time bodhisattva, I've been goig to all those classes" you
say. "Yeah, well, why are you always talking bad abot us, you know, like we
know what you talk about at breakfast with your friends and, and, and we heard
what you said about us and we thaought you were a bodhisattva?" And they
say, "Yeah, yeah, I'm a bodhisattva". And they say, "W'll why are you talking
about us like that, why are you talking bad about us? I thought you were gonne
be a bodhisattva?" Its like all sentient beings are talking to you. And then there
comes this oint in the verse, "Oh, oh you're Joe Bodhisattva, so you have all these
high spirtual qualities, you kow, you have all this compassion, all this love, you
know all this, you don't have any jealousy anger desire, nothing, you know,
you're like Joe Bodhisattva. whooo, Joe Bodhisattva. And then they look closer
and they say, "Oh wait a minute, we don't need this kind of bodhisattva, you
keep those good qualities that you have, you know." [laughter]
"I, I, I we'll get by, you know." This is all sentient beings talking to you, Joe
Bodhisattva. "We see what kind of qualities you have, we see your religious
qualities. I'll tell youwhat, you just keep them and we'll, we'll, we'll get along, you
know, we'll try to find some other ones." Why? "He is a being of qualities."
Meaning you, right? This is all sentient beings taling to you. "You live in the jaws
of the lower births, the savage jaws of the lowers births." Meaning, "the way
that you're acting, is gonna end you up int he hells for sure. Do we want to
emulate you? Do we want you saving us? No thanks Joe Bodhisattva, you kow,
you just take cre of yourself, you know, we don't are we supposed to follow
you? You know, we're supposed to folow you? Do you think that we want to
go to the lower birth? I'll tell you what you just keep your bodhisattva stuff to
yourself and we'll, we'll, we'll work it out, you know." It's all sentient beings
looking at you and evaluating your bodhisattvaness. This is {dakshen}, you
know you hear the word translated, exchanging self and others, this is it, they're
looking at you now with eyes of evaluating you as a bodhisattva. "You have no
compassion for living beings, you don't really care about us, do you think we
want to be like you?" You know, "Do you think we want to be a bodhisattva like
you? No thanks." Even worse, you have this delusion that you do have spiritual
life and you're just screwing up the whole system, you know. You go to class,
you learn some Tibetan, and you think that makes you a bodhisattva but reall,
you don't really care much more about anyone else than anyone alse does, so
what? Do you want us to act like you? Youknow , you're the bodhisattva that
we're supposed to be like no thatks. " This is what the verse says. All sentient
beins are looking at you and saying, "Come back later, you know, we don't need
the good qualities that you have." Okay, it's kind of cruel. Alright, three more.
Yeah.

Hector: "Bodhisattva watching out for yourself."
No matter what, we must see to it that all the good qualities that we have are
spoken all over the world, we must insure, moreover that that any good
qualities that he may happen to have are known to no one at all. Any faults that
we may have must be hidden away, offerrings must be made to us, but not to
him. We must gain with ease and now, the thing we want. And we must gain all
honour, but not him. When something wrong befalss him, all of us will watch a
long time, feeling a kind of joy. We'll assure that he becomes a laughing stock of
everyone deride in all circles."

So it's like this. What if all other sentient beings started to think like you and me,
you know what if my brain, what if my state of mind got put in to your head?
Then you would look at me and say, "No matter what, all sentient beings should
see that all of our good qualities get spoken all over the world, you know we get
in Mandala magazine, we get famous, all of all the good things, you know, that
should be in the bold print, you know. And all of our good qualities should be
spread all over the world. And you, you sstupid little bodhisattva, we're gonna
make sure that no one knows that you have any good qualities at all. That's
what you want right? Any faults that we have should be hidden away and all his
faults should be exposed, alright. So al sentient beings should be looking at you
and saying, "You know we're gonna make sure that no body knows about
whatever good qualities you ahe ans then we're gonna make sure that everyone
knows about ours." "Offerrings must be made to us and not to him." By the way
this is also can be twisted the other way, this is the way you're really supposed to
think. Okay, do you see the double. Okay, I say it both ways. If every body in
the world though the way you think, then everybody in the world would be
saying, I hope we all get famous and I hope no body ever hears avout him, but
that's actually the goal of the bodhisattva. Oka, the goal of a bodhisattva is that
they should think that way and that's the way it should be. and that it should
really be that way. They should get everything, I shouldn't get anything, okay.
So it's a double twist going on here, I'll say it again. If they thought the way that
I think about myself they would be saying, "We should be famous and he should
be unknown." But that's really wha a bodhisattva wants, if you're a good
bodhisattva, you do want to be unknown and youwant everybody else to get
famous. Okay, so there's a double thing here. I'm not, it's hard, hard to
translate. "We should get all the things we want, immediately, he shouldn't get
anything. And when something screws up with him, we'll sit there and watch
him and enjoy it and not do anything, you know, alrigt?" Cause that's the way
we act, rigt? About other people. What itf the whole world started acting that
way to you? What if your attitude's got planted in everybody else, then the next
time you got a cold they're all sayinjg, "Oh, too bad you have a cold, that's a real
shame", you kow. Because that's how we think about other people and we'll
make sure that everyones talking about you behind your back and making jokes
about you. And we'll make sure that every body is honouring us, okay. We'll
take care of that, because you're supposedly a bodhisattve and we're supposed
to think like you. So what if we do think like you?" okay? [laughs] Alright?
Got it? It's hard, it's hard at nine thirty. Alright, next one, thirty six.

Hector: "The foolishness of thinking that you get nothing out of serving others."

If you had at some point in the past undertaken this very action, then it is
completely impossible that you wouldd be living in something like this. In
something so opposite to the excellect bliss of Buddha hood."

This is a very famous verse and it starts out with a question from the reader.
Youknow, the person who Master Shantideva is writing to. And they say,
"Look, I have done things for other people and I don't see any big result, you
know. I have in my life already, don't things for other people. I didn't see
Tantric Angels, I didn't get enlightened. I didn't see emptiness directly. None of
this stuff that you're talking about happened to me. I've already helped other
people. You know, in my life, I have, for a certain amount of my life, a certain
percent of my money, a certain percent of my effort I put into helping other
people. I don't see any of this stuff that you're talking about, it didn't happen to
me. And Master Shantideva says, "It's impossible that you would be as miserable
as you are now if you had done it. Don't bullshit me." You know, it's really cool.
He says, "Come on, get real, you know, I know you haven't been thinking like
that or you wouldn't be like you are." You know, "If you had really exchanged
your self and others, you, you, it would be obvious in your face right now. It
would be obvious in your face, I could read it from your face. I could read it
from your life. You would be, you would have all the money you need, you
would have al the happiness you need, you would have all the knowledge you
need. Don't give me this story that you've beenhelping other people. The fact
that your life is so miserable, proves that you weren't doing it. And it's
impossible that you would be like this if you had exchanged yourself with other
people in the past. You wouldn't be like this now. The fact that you're miserable
right now is proof that you were doing it too wimpy and you didn't really put
your heart into it and you probably didn't do it anyway. But I don't need to
know anything else. If you're not happy, physically and mentally right now, it's
proof that you haven't been taking care of other people, I don't need to know
anything else, I can tell your past life. We don't have to have an interveiw, you
don't have to tell me all the things that you did in your life. If you're not happy,
right now, I can tell you, that you didn't exchange yourself and others. He says
it's impossible that youu would be...." He uses, {mi sipa}. The word {misipa}
means, "It's impossible that your life would be such a miserable thing if you had
done this before." He's very blunt about it, okay.

Hector: [unclear]

Hector said, "How is it possible that animals get to be human? Cause how can
they practice this? How can they take care of others, it doesn't seem to be their
nature to take care of others."For an animal to become a human is almost a freak
of naure, it' s an accident, it's a total accident. Typical story of an animal that
became a human is, an animal lands on a cow pie, a fly lands on a cow pie, there's
a huge rainstorm, the cow pie floats down the... on, on this gully, what do you
call those, down this gutter, and accidentally goes around a stupa. And the frlies
like riding on for dear life, you know, [laughter]. And, and that tiny karma, you
kow all his other karma wore off, his hell arma wore off, his animal karma wore
off and then almost by accident he has this other karma. They say the odds are
well more thatn a million to one, or two or three billion to one. It's actually the
odds are, if you want to know; the atoms in this planet to, ratio to three or
something like that, okay, alright.           That's about the odds, almost totally
impossible. To become a human is extremely, the odds are something like
trillions, and trillions to one, against it. Let me see what's next. I'm not going to
do all the verses because we don't have time. Let's do number thirty eight okay.
By the way, I like that verse, "Don't tell me you're, don't tell me you're life story, I
can tell it, I can see it from your face. I can see it from the way that your life is
going. And don't tell me that you've been practicing, cause if you're not happy
and if you're not comfortable, you haven't been doing it, proof, impossible, he
said. Alright, go ahead.

Hector: "The secret life of bodhisattvas."

Let me command myself to work for ever purpose acting as if I were the least of
servants, he is as if by his very nature wrong, refuse to praise him for some
small accidental good. See to it that any qualityies that he does have, aren't
detected by anyone else at all."

This is all sentient beings looking at you again, and they come up and they say,
"How is this guy? Basically good? Basically bad? Basically lousy? Basically
perfect? Let's see, how is he? And they come up to you, Michael Roach, and
they say, "Pretty much lousy, you know, few good qualities, mostly bad, ninety-
nine percent bad, sorry. You know, not too great." I mean talking serious
sacred holy good qualities, not much there. And then what's he say? "He's done
something good, what should... should we say anything? They have this
bodhisattva meeting, meaning all sentient beings, "Oh, Michael Roach did
something good, you know, he fought his jealousy last week, pretty good job.
Well, what do you think, should we praise him? Nah, It's like an accident, it
happes like once in a year, you know. And that's a, that's what the verse is.
"Let's refuse to praise him for some small accidental good." "Okay, yeah, he did
something good but it's so obviously small and accidental. Juast by sheer good
luck that he did something right, don't, don't tell him what a good guy he is, he'll
probably just get pride about that, let's just leave it. Pretty much, his basic nature
is lousy, from time to time there's these steaks of something happes good. But
mostly by accident." "Let's see to it that any qualities that he has at all are not
detected by anyone else at all." And here, the true bodhisattva is getting into the
head of sentient beings. Like all sentient beings are looking at Michael Roach
and saying, "Wait, he does have some good qualities, what should we do? Let's
just keep it under wraps, let's not tell anybody, youu know, no reason to tell
anybody, bodhisattvas don't care about that kind of stuff, he's a bodhisattva. We
don't have to tell anybody, is that what he wants? Oh yeah, he's a bodhisattva,
that's what he wants. What does he want? He doesn't want anybody to say
anything good about the things that he did. Keep it all secret, let's all keep it a
secret. This is like the real attitude that you're supposed to have. It's like all
sentient beings are having a big meeting and they're saying, Okay Winston did
something great, we all know, what should we do about it? Let's keep it a secret,
okay? Why? Because he's a bodhisattva and he won't ant anybody to know.
Oh, yeah, okay. We'll just keep it quiet. Bodhisattvas good deeds are secret,
mostly. It comes in the eight verses if you read it at the last verse, {gyu dang
ngusu shepa yi}. It's it's like, the true good deeds of most bodhisattvas are secret.
Okay.

Hector: "The endless thirst of attachment to your own deeds."

The more it is that you take steps to do what it is to take steps in order to care
for this, the body of yours, the more it is that the body decends to nothing more
than a state in which it can't bear pain at all. And the fall is such that even if the
entire earth is covered with the things you wanted, it would never be enough to
quench the desire. Who then is it that could act to give you all your want? When
they cannot then this desire brings on mental afflictions and the lessining of the
thought."

At this point in the text Master Shantideva has goten finished with the idea of
exchanging you self and other, like, "So you know, I'm gonna work mainly for
other peoples happines instead of my own, I'm gonna work to try to stop other
peoples pain instead of trying to stop my own, mainly. Primarily I'm going to
work for them. And then he says, "What precents you from putting it into actual
practice?' That's the theory, right? the attitude is mental. But what prevents you
from really doing it? You kow, what's the main thing in your life, that keeps you
from putting thins noble stuff into real live practice? And it comes down to
something very interesting. One of the main problems is your body, your body.
Your body is demading that you be selfish. Much, very, very much of your
every day activity that's self protecting and self cherishing is to protect and to
serve and to honour and to worship this stupid bag of guts. And he says that, he
get's into that. He says, "Allot of what prevents you from taking care of other
people is that your body demand so much attention of you." You, you work so
hard to, to feed your body, to clothe your body, to care for your body, to poop
it at the right time, to pee pee it at the right time, to dress it at the right time, to
feed it at the right time, to wash it at the right time. To make sure that it looks
nicer than other peoples bodies. To work it out at the right time. And all of this
adds up to self cherishing, this is preventing you from reaching what you want.
And then he gets into the problems that the body causes adn what he gets into
here is that the body has a certain nasty quality. The more you take care of it,
the more demanding it gets, okay. Like I was at someones house this morning,
very waelthy person, it's this beatiful house and they've got this very conplicated
air conditioning system, I ws thinging about it, Every floor and every room on
every floor and every corner of every room on every floor is great. It feels
great. It doesn't matter where you go, there's this quiet wonderful efficient, it
took a long time to get it to work just right. You know and it's got ducts and
machinery everywhere. And you can feel, the whole house comes on like,
"bbrrr", you know, and no matter where you sit, its perfect. And then I was
thinking, "What would happen if I would live in this house for awhile?",
youknow. What would happen if I staryd here for awhile. I mean, going out to
New Jersey to my room or going to sixth street to my room, it would become
unbearable.        You know, right now it's hard, because I don't have air
conditioning, I don't have anything, it's just hot and it's sweaty and you feel bad.
But if I was used to being well air conditioned, and thenI tried to sleep there,
forget it. And he says, the body is like that. The more you, you know coddle it?
What is another word? The more you pamper it, the worse it gets, it's very
ironic. You know, the more you take care of your body, the more demading, it
gets more and more whiny. And you meet these rich people, you know, who...
I, I was with one in Thailand, right, "I want maple syrup!", This is at the Oriental
Hotel, best hotel in the world right, Bangkok. All these guys in white coats in a
hundred and twelve degrees and they're like seating you know and they're like,
"Yes ma'm." And, and we're out on the veranda, you know, and she's like, "I
want maple syrup!", you know. And this is the best hotel in the world, you're
supposed to get what you want, you know. And they're like, "What's maple
syrup? What's maple syrup?", you know. [laughter] And everyone's going,
"What? What? Maple syrup?" And, and she's like "I want maple syrup!" ANd
they had this big meeting and they called down the management of the hotel
and they said, "You know, Mrs. so and so wants maple syrup you knw." And
they're like, "We can't get maple syrup in Bangkok, maybe we can get it from
Hong Kong." You know and they're like calling around, where can they get
maple syrup? And this lady, she can't enjoy her breakfast, like she's having this
horrible breakfast in the best hotel in the world with these incredible waffles and
pancakes and stuff, because she can't get maple syrup, all she can get is regular
syrup, you know. And it was as I was thinking, this is scary, you know, I mean if
you got rich, this would be scary, you know. Plain old incredible waffles covered
with every kind of fruit you can imagine in Thailand is not good enough, you
know. And she got used to demanding whatever they want. And he says, "The
body is like that, you can't make it happy." The next verse says, You could cover
the worl with things to make your body happen, happy. Massage lotions,
beautiful clothes, all the hair you want, excetera and it wouldn't be enough. The
next day you'd want blonde hair, you know and the day after that you would
want it to be a little more curly. You know and the day after that you would
want it to be a little bit longer and no split ends, you know. [laughter] And it's
un... it's insatiable, you cannot please the body. The ironic thing is that the more
you try, the worse things get. Yeah.
student: [unclear]

Oh, he says, "What's the difference between trying to please your body now and
having a body in a Buddha Paradise that just naturally gives you bliss?" Big
difference. When we say, "Trying to make the body happy" in a negative sense,
we assume two things. We assume ignorance. You know we assume that you
are miss perceiving the body. "You get maple syrup ant the Oriental Hotel in
bankok by demaning it and making all the waiters uncomfortable." But how do
your really get maple srup at the Oriental Hotel in Bangkok. You give it to other
people, you make god damn sure that all that all the poor people in Bangkok
have enough to eat. That's how you get maple syrup at the Oriental Hotel. But
that would never occur to this person, it's impossible. That's ignorance, that's
ignoraance, ignorace causes that. So, so the way, the way the Budhas, the reason
the Buddhas only have a body that can give him or her extasy is that, and he or
she knows it. And he or she keeps acting like that. Go ahead, second question.

student: [unclear]

The second part was that you would do a bad deed to to get it and you don't
understand i's nature. Those are the the
two elements. You would make all the waiters uncomfortable to get this thing
that you want and therefore assure that you won't get it again. And then
secondly, only because you den't understand the real source of maple syrup do
you make the waiters uncomfortable. If you really understood the source of
maple syrup, you would do all you could to make all the waiters comfortable.
Yeah.

student: [unclear]

Why can't we be satisfied? Like in the First Panchen Lamas text, you know, it
one of the classic sufferings of mankind, that you can't be satisfied, now why? I
would say that it's tied up with ingnorance of not understanding the object or
something like that. Figure out the connecton. That's all. Let's try, we got room
for one more. This is the last verse, okay, the last verse of the course okay, we
have a review on Thursday. Okay, enjoy.

Hector: "The ingratitude of the body."

In the worship of this body, you've piled up many sufferrings, all of it
meaninglessly. All of it no better than a peice of wood. Why, the love and hate?
Regardless of whatever I continue to care for the body or whether the vultures
come to feed upon it, it has no feeling of attatchment or anger, why is it that I
have attatchment myself? Look, why is it htat you spend your life hurting other
people, bothering other people, taking all your resources and depriving other
people of them, just to care or your body, just for your body, you know, the
basic differece you and other people is that you have a differrent corpse than
they do, right? I mean that's mainly why you take care of yourself. Your body is
at the bottom of alot of the problems, your boy is demanding this attention and
your body is, is deceiving you into saying, "I'm separate from other peole." I
mean, it's a lie and the body is a is a big part of the lie. It looks like you're
separate from other people and this body is cheating you, this body is deceiving
you,and then what, what do you do for the body? Every dis... every lie you ever
told was for your body, think about it. Ultimately , it was to make you happy. It
was to make what you call you happy. Why do you call you, you? Mainly
because I have a different body. What was at the bottom line that I wanted to
keep happy? My body. I wanted it to have the nicest clothes, I wanted it to have
the nicest girlfriend, I wanted it to have the nicest house, it should sit in the vice
presidents chair and not some one elses body, you know, all of this is for the
body. Then Master Shantideva says, "Go ask your body if it ever wanted it
anyway. Go ask your body if it cares? Does your body get desire for the vice
presidents chair and hatred for some lousy person who's bothering you? Does
your body basically care? No. It's just physical matter, it's just dead meat. Dead
meant don't care, dead meat don't care whether you're in the vice presidents
chair or whether you don't put in the vice presidents chair. Dead meat could care
less, right. If you take away the mind, if you take away the desire, does the
body itself give a damn? No. Does that dead meat care whether it's sitting in
the chair or in the vice presidents chair? No. It's just dead meat. It is motivated.
It is put into motion by the mind. It's the mind that wants all those things the
body is not demanding it, the body never asked for all those things. Okay, it's
not like these atoms are demanding a vice-presidents chair. They could care less,
they are just like any other atom. Devoid of the mind, with out the mind, the
body can't even get up from a chair. The body would just flop down on the floor
and stay there, "it's like a peice of wood", he says. So, who are, who are you
doing it for? Who's asking you to do all this stuff? Just your desire. Okay, the
body's not telling you, the body doesn't wake up in the morning and say, and
tap you on the back and say, "I want the nicest clothes in New York today, could
we go to Macy's tonight? The body doesn't do that. The body doesn't say, "Oh,
this chair is not as good as the other chair, could we work for twenty years and
try to get that other chair, you know. The body doesn't cause that, it's your
mind, it's your desire. Okay, so this is like Master Shantideva is defending the
body. Okay, don't don't waste your life serving the body. The body doesn't
even want it. The body isn't even asking you to do it, you're doing it, you're the
one you're the one that thinkis that the body has to sit in that chair instead of
that chair. The body doesn't care, the body is just dead meat. Okay, and
inrateful also, no matter how hard you work your ass off, the body's not going
to thank you, or talk bad to you. The body could care less, the body is just meat.
The body is going to end up in the cemetery. Don't spend your whole life
working for some guy who could care less. Forget the body get free of the
body, get free of this body and forget the boundary that the body puts between
you and other people. It's a false boundary. You know, it's not natural, it doesn't
have to be like that. You're, ou're ides of who you are has to be bigger than
your body and then you'll be happiness. And, and last thing, okay, serve the
body, it just doesn't work. I'm not saying, "Oh, you should have this attitude or
that attitude", it just doesn't work, you know. Trying to take care of yourself is
dissfunctional. Go and look at the world, Donald Trump can't keep a wife. He's
a master of getting what he wants for himself. But he's not happy at all. He's
always in, I don't know how many days, he's spent in divorce court, youknow.
He's not happy. Trust me, he's not happy. Gotta give to other people, you
gotta, it doesn't work to be selfish. It doesn't work to just care about yourself, it
doesn't get you what you want. If you, if you want something, take care of
other people, start taking care of other people. If you really want to be happy,
be smart about it and the opposite just doesn't work, there's no use to go on
doing that. You can get old doing that and you'll just die and you won't get what
you want, so forget it and start taking care of other people and you will get what
you want. It's very, very, very sweet. It's all the things that you ever dreamed
of will happen to you. Just try it, you know. The more you can try it it will
happen to you. Just try it, you know the more it will happen to you. It will
come, it really will come. The other thing is disfuctional, you tried it, you already
know it doesn't work. Okay, we'll stop there.

prayers: [short mandala]
prayers: [dedication]
970826-1

Geshe Michael Roach
Course XI: Guide to the Bodhisattvas Way of Life, Part Two
Class Eleven Course Review
August 26, 1997
transcribed by: Amber Moore



[note: possible section missing in middle, search for @@ and check on original
tape]

prayer: [short mandala offering]

prayer: [refuge]

Okay, today is review for the final exam, it usually doesn't take the whole time,
so don't worry. And all the questions that are going to be asked on the final
exam come from all the quizzes, so if you study all the quizzes, you'll do fine on
the final. The purpose of the final is not to punish you. It's really to make sure
that you know what you need to know from this course. In what sense? In my
idea, if you can do well on the final, you've, you've pretty much understood the
major points of this course, first of all. Secondly, if you can do well on the final in
my idea, you can teach other people this subject pretty well, you know what I
mean? And my dream is that most of the people in this room either on an
individual basis at work or with their friend or at an organized basis at our
future temples in Queens, Bronx, Brooklyn and Staten Island, could and the port
authority, could, could give teachings to other people. And really, that's what,
the purpose of the final is to make sure that you understand the most important
points of the course. Not to praise myself, But when I was in. when I did my
Geshe exam, it was seven days of debating and the last few days were in front of
all the monks of Sera Mey. Five Hundred, Six Hundred Monks. And I was just
laughing and having a good time and the students who came with me were like
how come you're not nervous you know, what's going on? You know, And I
said, teaching the classes, I've gone over everything that they're asking me, you
know. Just from teaching these classes, I've been through all of that. Two or
three times, every question. So you know and I'm just having a good time. So,
you know, I didn't have a problem with anything, you know, it was. What I'm
trying to say is that you really are learning the stuff that, if it were done in
English, you could probably sit there and not do too bad at Sera Mey. Except
you would have to memorize all those books, that's a another thing. But in
general, if you learn this stuff well and if you can do well on your finals, you
know, that's pretty much what you learn. That's pretty much what you learn in
that curriculum. You know that's pretty much what you learn in that course,
And so that's why I could do that on my exams. So it was from these classes. So
my purpose of giving you a final is no to punish you or test you or something
like that, it's that I want to make sure that you are qualified and that you know
the stuff and I give you all the questions on the final, why? I just want you to
know it, You know, I'm not trying to trick anybody you know. I want you to
know what's coming and I want to you study it and I want you to know it. I
mean that's the purpose in giving a final. You know it's not that I'm trying to trip
you up with some trick question or something, I want you to know all these
answers and I want you to know those are the important questions. So there's a
small list of questions here and by some coincidence, some of them might appear
on the final, okay, [laughter]. Sometimes I just ask people, I just go around and
embarrass people, cause you didn't study yet, right? For the final, that happens
the day before. I think it's important that you know the root text that you just
studied, alright, [b:Bodhisattva acharya avatara.] If you're in Tibetan track,
{jangchub sempa chupa lan jukpa}, or if you are gonna cop out, {chun juk}, which
is the short name, okay. By the way, if anyone has a burning desire for me to
write something in Tibetan let me know, otherwise I am assuming you have it in
your notes and in your..... You should know who wrote it, you should know
his dates. You should know the commentary that you studied which is called,
{Gyel tse juk ngo}, "Entry point for Children of the Victorious Buddhas". You
should know that it was written by Gyaltsab Je, you should know that his other
name is Darma Rinchen. And you shouldn't spell it like Dharma, because it's not
the Sanskrit Dharma, it's another it's just a name, Darma. You should know
Gyaltsab Je's dates, okay. You have to really appreciate Gyaltsab Je, okay, he is
extraordinary, I mean, Je Tsongkapa sort of overshadows his two disciples, but if
Je Tsongkapa had never happened, Gyaltsab Je would have been the greatest
writer in Tibet or something. You know and he is an extraordinary debater and
philosopher. We spend, in the monastery, on month, every summer, every
winter in open competition between all the six great colleges, seven great
colleges, if you count Tashi Hlumpo, and we debate Gyaltsab Je's works and
often times you will spend three or four days, maybe twelve to fifteen hours a
day on a single page of one of his works. He is just extraordinary and that's
never been translated, so you've got what I think is one of the best
commentaries and, by what I think is one of the greatest Buddhist Masters of all
time. Okay, next we get into the perfection of patience and Gyaltsab Je and
Master Shantideva they were dividing what are the problems of getting angry
into two. Those that you can see and those that you cannot see and I think that
that problem that you cannot see is the most important thing that you need to
know about anger. Okay, let's see, who should I embarrass first? Margie or ...
[cut]



[@@note: possiblbe section missing here, have someone check original tape]



It gets more and more sensitive, it gets more and more sensitive. Like if you get
used to having an air conditioner, then you, you suffer even more when you go
out. You know, like I've always, I don't have an air conditioner in my room and
I never wanted one cause I always thought, "If I get too comfortable I'd get soft."
You get soft. And then when you go out, you get worse. So, the more you take
care of your body, the more you pamper yourself. You know, eat exactly the
kind of food that you want make sure it's cooked exactly the way you like it.
You know, make sure that you have the right kind of money that you want.
Make sure you have the nice apartment that you want, then you are just setting
yourself up for very, very serious suffering. Better to just live in a crappy
apartment, lots of roaches, you know, not much money, don't get much sleep.
You know, better that you just have everything raw, because then you're not.
By pampering yourself you get more sensitized to pain and you feel it worse.
You know, get used to what you have. Be contented to what you have, and, and
realize that you get all the things that you're dreaming of would actually cause
you more suffering. Yeah?

student: [unclear]

Yeah.

student: [unclear]

Yeah, also Marvin pointed out that to get, to get the nice apartment and stuff like
that you also have to do allot of bad deeds, normally. So that's also another
disadvantage. So, last thing, by the way you just finished, you know, we are
spending a whole year on his book. Why? We didn't spend a whole year on the
Mahdyumika avatara, we didn't spend a year on the Abbhisamayalankara, we
didn't spend a year on the Praminavartika. We didn't spend a year on the Lam
Rim Chenmo or the Vinaya Sutra, or the Abbhidharmakosha. Why? This is, this
book is to me, if you can practice this book, you will reach enlightenment, and
you smell it, right? You sense it, you smell that what I'm saying is true. You
smell that if you did all this stuff, half serious, your life would be some kind of
tantric dream. You know, things would be happening that you ever, ever
dreamed of, I mean, it would be like entering some other realm. And you sense
the possibility even if you are not practicing well, and you're not keeping your
book and you're not meditating properly, even, all of that, I think that ever
person in this room smells the logical possibility that all this stuff is true. You
know and you can do it. You will be able to do it. That's the beauty of this book.
This book is extremely practical and you smell that if you did this stuff.
Particularly exchanging your mind with other peoples minds, Start to do it, try to
do it. I gained allot, I didn't do it very seriously, I didn't do it very much, but I
tried to imagine that myself extended to another person and then I tried to
imagine, what would I want now? You know, now that I and two people, what
do we want? And it was very, very beautiful and you can sense the power of it,
you know, you can sense that if you could do it, things would change radically in
your life and it actually is quite pleasant. You know, I was getting up I was
serving people, I was making sure they had stuff, I was doing the dishes first and
it felt really good and it's extremely good karma, try to do it, try to actually do it,
it's good. You have now a long break, you have until early October. Unless you
are doing, Like there will be some classes in between, like Rinchen Darlo is
giving a good spoken Tibetan class and there is some good translation stuff
going on. If you're Tibetan is pretty good and you want to sit in on some
translation sessions, talk to maybe, me, I guess. Okay, we'll be doing some of
those. But the main thing, we designed these courses to have a gap, because
during the course, while the course is going on your life is stresses, your life is
more stressful. It's about fifteen more hours extra in your life, that you didn't
have before you started. And doing the homework, coming to class, getting
ready to go to class, transportation to and from class, explaining to your boss
and to your wife why you are going to class, all of these things put more stress
on you. Now, the idea is that you have, like a month and a half, to just
concentrate on trying it out, you know, putting it into practice. You know, this is
where my job ends. I can't do anything beyond what I did. You know, I taught
you the theory, I taught you and me the theory, now whether you and me can
put it into practice is totally a different matter. Khen Rinpoche, in New Jersey,
will not grant interviews, almost at all. You know, you go in and you try to
describe to Rinpoche some problem that you have, you know, you go in and
you try to ask him, "Which apartment should I take?", or "Should I do this or
that?" And he almost always gives you the same answer, he says, "Look, I taught
you, for twenty, years, the Dharma, now you go do it." "Don't ask me these
specific questions, don't do that, that is why I taught you the Dharma, you have
to do it now, you know, my job ended when you left the class, you know, I can
give you guidance if you are having a problem in your meditation, or you are
having some difficulty fighting a certain mental affliction and you want me to
remind you of what Master Shantideva said, I'll be happy to go out to lunch with
you, especially if you pay, right Tasha? Where is Tasha, I got to pay you back
after class alright. We were in a restaurant and I didn't have any money,
[laughs]. I can do that and I'm happy to do that, but really , the main job now is
out of my hands, it's your job and you have to do it and if you do it you will be
very, very, very happy. And if you do it half way, you will be half way happy,
and if you don't do it much at all you will continue the way you did and you will
die like that and you will suffer, really. Don't do that, you don't have to do that,
you don't have to die like that. I am not giving courses in stress management,
I'm giving courses in eternal life and Paradise. You know, you will enter an
Angels Body, you will enter a Paradise if you do these things. And you don't
have to die like thins you don't have to suffer like thins. You don't have to stay in
this world like this. You know, that's the whole idea, so do it okay, please do it,
alright? I'll try to do it too. We have a few announcements, so please don't,
please try to pay attention, don't walk up and walk out or anything.

John Stillwell: Before Geshe La does his ending schpeil, I just have a few practical
points, as far as the final exam goes, I know that allot of you will be in California,
so if the exam available now?

It was done today, so it could be available tomorrow.

J. Stillwell: So you can pick up the exam, if you are not going to be here for the
final exam, the final exam is scheduled to be here on the fourth, in the cafeteria,
not in this room, please come then and take it. If you are going to be out of
town of that day and you cannot attend, i.e. you're gonna be in California, you
can pick up the exam at the three jewels, before you go or after you come back
and mail it to your grader. Okay, okay, you can pick it up out back now, if you
don't know where it is see Ora. Do not pick it up if you are not going to
California or you are not going to be there that day, [laughs].

Bad karma

J. Stillwell: In any case so take the exam if you are going to California, mail it to
your grader within one week of your return. We want to close the course, send
those grades to Dr., Taylor and get those certificates issued, so we don't want
allot of straggler papers. If you are going to be here, all of your graded quizzes
will be mailed back to you by your grader, as soon as they are don't grading
them. If you do want to study some more during the break, there are
correspondence course order forms at the back, either by video or by audio.
You can pick up that info. Please drop off your old notebooks, the thin
notebooks in the boxes in the back on the way out. If you did not get a thick
notebook, then get a thick note book and then I have to make the last, thank
you everyone who has donated for the classes, they are free. There is no charge,
it does cost us about fifteen thousand dollars a year to conduct classes, if you can
afford to reimburse us or to make a donation, please do so. We much appreciate
it and much need it and if you cannot afford it then that's fine too. And Hector
has one final announcement before Geshe La does his final announcements,
[laughter].

Hector: On behalf of all of us, please return to teach.

J. Stillwell: And Hector says, there's two boots pizza out in the back.

Alright. A toast to our enlightenment. Je Tsongkapa says, to Ngawang Drakpa,
"Hey, you and me are going to share this cup of the nectar of immortality when
we get to Buddha Paradise, so, toast to that."

[clapping]

I used to get up here and kvetch and complain that I never got any help, and the
karma of that, no not really. The karma of being patient was that now,
everything in this place in done by other people. Now, every single detail, we
have nineteen projects going on, and every one is taken care of by somebody in
this room and I just wanted to go through them. You should rejoice, Okay here
is your chance to "steal" ten percent of their virtue. Alright, rejoice, really
consciously and purposely rejoice right now and enjoy, what I'm about to say,
right now, okay. First I wanted to thank John Stillwell, for he...[clapping], is
unpopular among, among the volunteers, because he pushes so hard to get
things done and he gets things done. And he gets things done. Especially the
correspondence courses. He fought with me for a year to get them ready, finally
he did it himself, with Ora, and he is responsible for that and you should thank,
in your mind, you should be grateful for that. He found these places, he
arranges all, he spends allot of his time and he gets hassled for it, from his other
employers, ect. And appreciate it, okay, appreciate him. These things are not
self existent, right? I want to thank the graders, I used to grade every paper, I
didn't have any sleep, [laughter], [clapping]. That's Fran Dayan, Fran Perrilo,
Andy and Scott.. Okay, I would like to thank people who help run the course,
there back there running right now in fact. John Brady, Maria Theresa, and
Brooks, and Scott's been working on them too. [clapping] I would like to thank
our major sponsors. What's happening with these classes, is that as I had hoped,
the Dharma is free. You know, people are getting the Dharma for free and the
correspondence courses for free and what's happening is, a certain number of
people are turning on to it and we are actually getting some very large
donations, like people are coming up to me with a thousand dollars, thirteen
hundred dollars. In the last few weeks, it's happening like that. We are starting
to break even on the courses. And I'm not going to mane those people, I'm not
sure that they want to be named. Maybe I should, but I just personally want to
thank those people and you know who you are and it's beautiful, it's really,
really beautiful that you are providing the Dharma for the other people, okay, so
I thank you for that. [clapping] Yeah, and I think that Leon is one that I can
mention. We take him for granted, but he is losing about fifteen thousand[?]
dollars a month in rent by giving us those places to stay and for the monks and
nuns, and I think we should appreciate it that and I think we should appreciate
that. I don't even think he is here, I think he's out fixing a computer at
Duetchbank. I want to thank Margie for driving me. She really refuses to let me
walk here. I really wanted to see all the sights between here and sixth street, but
she won't let me. Andy has been doing carpentry work all over the place. Did a
beautiful work over at sixth street, did some fantastic things for Rinpoche and I
really want to thank him for that. [clapping] And I know that in his case, he
doesn't have time and it's always coming out of his sleep or out of other things
and I know it's allot of stress for him. Helen Mc Hayle did a good job on Friday
night, doing the announcements and stuff. [clapping] Ora spent, on the readings,
she spent about three, four hours a day, I think for the last six weeks or so. I
don't do any of the Tibetan layout or the English Layout anymore. But all the
work, of layout, and all that stuff, it's like hours every day has been done by
mostly her, so I would like to thank her for that. [clapping] And that allows me
to do more, so that's why your note book is thicker, because I have help, you
know, so that's really good. Elizabeth and Christie helped allot in running
around, Elly ran around allot doing the Xeroxing and that. You know, doing the
Xeroxing is very thankless work, you have to stand there, you know, hundreds
of pages come out, you have to drag is here, you don't get reimbursed for the
taxi, like Michael said you would. Stuff like that. [laughter] Judy Hummel,
where is Judy? Doing all the finances, very quietly and efficiently, taking care of
all the finances of our organization. You always need one of those. By the way
and what you are seeing in this room is doing something and that's the beauty of
it. The real beauty of it is that almost everyone in this room is doing something,
from the bottom of their hearts. That's very important and to me, that makes
me very happy. It makes me think that the class is having effect. Fran Dayan is
doing the grunt work on the finances and I think almost everyday, has been in
my office and helping me, with every kind of dirty work I give her. She never
says, "No." She's allot like Michael Wick, who also never says, "No." And they do
all this incredible amount of grunt work that goes into stuff. Michael Wick, I
think even wore out a car on us. So, sorry about that. Three Jewels has turned
out to be a Jewel. Many. many people coming there, many people coming
through there, to these courses. The kids class is great, we had a nice one last
night. And that's all because o f Ani Pelma and her work. And she really does,
it's allot of work. I looks like the store is just self existent, but you know that,
that for a place to stay there and for it to be cleaned and organized and run and
organized and opened and closed. it's something like sixteen hours of work per
day or something like that. I would like to thank Tasha for doing the altars.
Okay, thank you. [clapping] Nigel and Roy for helping, they've been helping at
the three Jewels allot. Tsering also. I want to thank Julia, you know, who has
been organizing the offerings to Khen Rinpoche. You know, I kinda wasn't too
sure that that would go over very well, cause he's not too sentimental, but he
loved it, and he got very excited about it and he's like waiting for the next one,
and, [laughter]. You know, "What's next? What are they going to do next?" And
he really does enjoy it, so I want to thank you for that. I want to thank Al the
Cheeseman for all that nice cheese Monday night and stuff. [clapping] Godstow,
there is a board for Godstow and they have worked their asses of and you don't
know, you just thing that thing is self existent, right? That there's this thing up
there and there's these retreats. It's been allot of work, it's been, like two years
of very difficult work. Fran Perrillo worked allot on it and still works on it.
Nancy Carin worked allot on it with the original work and also with the retreat
guidelines and stuff like that. Robyn Bretano types up allot of it and organized
allot of that. Andy has been working up there allot on the carpentry, the fences.
Michael Wick obviously, organizing everything and working really hard on it.
Who did I leave out? Jackie, worked hard on that. By the way, Jackie and Ernst
are on their summer retreat. They are trying to do a real monastic summer
retreat for two weeks and I want to thank them. I don't like to sit in these
banquets, these business banquets where they thank everybody, where it's
boring and it's late, really, I got some more. I want to thank Tessie for doing all
the extension courses. Really, it's allot of work, it's allot of co ordination. She
has to print thousands of pages of stuff, get it out to India, or Iowa or Tennessee.
She often comes along, so does all this grunt work, she doesn't get any sleep, she
organizes the schedule, people get mad at her, she does all that stuff very
happily and, thank you fro that. [clapping] Thubten Phuntsok has been doing
all the scheduling. I mean if you tried to set up an appointment or a date or
something, like eight hours a day he has been trying to respond to all the calls,
letters. Now, because of the work that your all doing, I mean, we are getting
dozens of letters every week, I mean it's getting like hundreds of letters and
phone calls and stuff like that. So thank him out in New Jersey. [clapping}.
Correspondence courses as you know, just reached, what, their hundred
thousandth page of stuff and their ten thousandth tape. It's not self existent.
These people are working in the dungeon, in the basement of Three Jewels,
which recently had like an inch of water, right? And working very hard. And
that's Mary Overdorf, Winston, Andrea and Magda. Okay, so I want to thank
them. And to thank all the graders, I know that there's allot of graders working
on that. I want to thank of our in house poet, Hector, for the reading, [clapping],
Dr., T. for administration. The whole New York board of directors, there really
is a board in new York. But the way we are going to be having an open election,
soon, as that board starts to revolve. We want to get more people involved in
the board. There are going to be open meetings of the organization. And we'll
start rotating n new people and the goal is that each person who is interested in
helping should be rotating in. So there will be two members or three members
of the board will be rotating every six months. Every year, okay, anyway, she's
a layer. [laughter]. Okay, anyway, it goes. It'll go like that and I would like to
see everyone get involved and you are welcome to get involved and we'll be
doing it like that. I want to thank Chilton for all the computer work. He actually
got all the computers to run and all the printers to run, which is great. [clapping]
I would like to thank the TV, crew. I had phone call yesterday, or the other day.
This is John Cogan, I am the eight year old in Princeton that you used to baby-sit
in nineteen seventy five and I saw you on cable TV and I would like to come to
class. Really, is that cool? Right. And it's because of their work. I mean, it's
catching new people, which is very nice. He said he was really bored and he was
watching at two am in the morning or something, I don't know. [laughs] Okay,
we have to thank somebody that you don't know that you have to thank. In
Sera Mey monastery and in fifteen other monasteries nunneries and refugee
camps in India, there are about one hundred people typing the Tibetan that you
have on your books and I would like to thank them okay. [clapping] And the
guy that you don't know, his name is Ngawang Rigdol. He gives his life for this
stuff, he spends his whole life, he's this little guy with an ulcer, a Geshe in Sere
Mey and he just doesn't sleep at all and, and that's why we have all these
readings and stuff. I would like to thank Elly, Venerable Elly, for doing all the
interviews, which saves me allot of time. I've got one that I can't read and they'll
probably get mad at me. Eric Columbel, by the way if you are not going to his
class you are really stupid, and the people who have gone I'm kind of
embarrassed to say, have learned Tibetan about ten times better than in my class
So you should check it out he's a very, very fine teacher. Tough teacher,
European style. Chunyi la, Venerable Chunyi-la did a fantastic class on the
preliminaries and I would like to thank you for that. And we will reimburse you
for your travel expenses, eventually. And I would like to thank Phuntsok and
the nuns, Pelma and Jigme Pelmo, they have been doing the regular, ongoing
courses and the meditation in the morning, they are starting a Sunday morning
meditation. And also Phuntsok's classes helped allot of people. Two more and
then you can go home, okay? We have to thank al the teacher at Sera Mey who
trained me, okay, there is about twelve Lamas total, who trained me. I could not
have done this without them. Geshe Thubten Rinchen, Geshe, Po, Gompo
Khensur, Pomora Khensur, Thubten Tenzin, Chugnye Tobgye, Gyalrong
Khensur Rinpoche, Geshe Ngawang Dargye and there's like twelve. Okay, and
you should thank them. And some of them are not even alive any more, Geshe
Dhargye and Geshe Kelden are......have passed away, but you should thank
them, okay. And them most importantly, we have to thank Khen Rinpoche,
because that's why these classes are happening. And you should really thank
him, and if you get a chance to thank him personally, you should thank him. I
would not be here if he didn't give me permission to come here and teach
originally. And I wouldn't be here, I wouldn't be able to do any of this if he
wasn't here. The book I am using, I have all these notes in it from nineteen
seventy to nineteen seventy five or something when he taught this. And it
amazed me, it occurred to me, you know, only when I saw the notes that he's
been teaching for twenty five years, never asked for anything, still cleans the
bathrooms when I don't do it. He's been very kind to us so you have to ....Let's
do his long life prayer, do you have it? Let's do that now, and let's pray for his
long life and have a good time on your final. Relax, okay, have a nice break.
And try to look over what we studied and try to practice it, alright. And we try
to do it, there's a traditional melody. Well do the long life prayer first and then
well do the Long Mandala offering, it's called {tangrat mandel} it means,
"Celebration " at the end of a great karma. We did a great karma. Just for this
class to happen is, is very, very rare in the world so enjoy. We'll do this chant, it's
a very special chant, it's traditionally done a little slower than you do it if you are
used to doing in the {tsechu} alright, so we'll do it the traditional way. It's a little
bit slower and you think about it as you do it. {Me jung trinley wo no nam tra
nu ......[Khen Rinpoche's Long Life Prayer]}

Prayer: [Long Mandala offering}

Prayer: [dedication]
Okay and just thank you very much for having me teach and just thank you
very much for making me do that, [laughs], okay. [clapping]. We don't do
prostrations at the last class, it means that we have some unfinished business
between us, alright , goodnight.

[cut]