Духовные партнёры: как растить личные и деловые отношения (2012, Лима), занятие 1

[Speaker 1]
First, I'd like to thank you for coming. And I'd like to thank everybody at Universidad del Pacifico for inviting us. I'm very honored that the Dean, Eduardo Mindoro, has been coming.

Then one day I was in China, and I was teaching this thing. And one lady raised her hand. She said, gozumoko, gozumoko.

Gozumoko, it means, how does this work? I have enough money, but I want to fix my husband. Can you use this principle to fix your husband?

Gozumoko. Then one guy raised his hand. Also to fix the wife.

Then later many people asked me, I don't have a partner. I don't have to fix my husband or my wife, I don't have one. But I would like to have one.

Can you use this principle of the seeds in the mind? To find a partner. Then I said, yes, you can do.

Now when I give business talk, maybe 1,000 people will come. If I give a relationship talk, 2,000 people will come. It means a partner is more important than money.

So I thought, we finished three talks about economic situation. We talked about managing a company. We talked about how to make more money personally.

Then tomorrow we are leaving for Buenos Aires. So my friends said, oh, on Sunday it's good, can you talk about relationships? So today is like a holiday.

We are sort of relaxed. And we talk about partners. Then people ask me, what is your own experience about a partner?

You are a monk. Then what do you know about partners? Then I became a monk very late, I was almost 30.

Then I went to normal American high school and college. I had lots of experience with girlfriends. So I thought, maybe we can talk from there.

So first I want to show you Paula Mande. This is page one of your reading. If you don't have reading, please raise your hand.

Everybody has. So this is Paula Mande. Actually it's not really Paula Mande.

Last night I am looking on the internet. I have to find 1960s girl. She is almost like that.

Then Paula Mande is my first girlfriend. I came to school in sixth grade. You are 12 years old.

Then she has a friend named Marsha Cooksey. Marsha. Paula has a friend named Marsha.

[Speaker 2]
Amiga.

[Speaker 1]
Then in the sixth grade, 12 years old, the girl shouldn't talk to the boy directly. The friend should talk to the boy. So in the class, I got a note from Marsha Cooksey under the table.

Then you have to look at the teacher, but you can open the note. Then the note says, Paula Mande likes you. Then I was very excited.

Then I have to look at Paula Mande a little bit. Then after a few weeks I got another note. From Marsha.

Paula Mande wants to go study with you. Then in the school, small school, if study means like steady girlfriend, and you have to have a ring. Then I thought, oh I have to buy a ring.

Then I didn't have any money. That's the only time I stole something. Of course it's for a girl.

And I stole five dollars from my mother's purse. And I bought a ring for Paula Mande. But I'm too shy to talk to her.

So I wrote a note for Marsha Cooksey. You tell Paula to meet me in the baseball field. On the stadium.

Then I will give her the ring. Then she came. I came.

I'm afraid to sit next to her. I sat two rows down. Then we are talking like this.

I heard you want to go to study. She said, yeah, I want to go. Then I said, I have a ring for you.

She said, okay, give me the ring. I'm too scared to touch her hand. So I threw the ring to her.

Then she caught it. Then we are going to study. Then of course all of her friends are asking her, who's the ring, who's the ring?

Then after a few months, I'm in the same class. Marsha Cooksey gives me a note. Then I open the note.

Ding! Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. One ring.

It's rolling down the class. Everybody in the class is looking. Then I look at the note.

Then I look at the note. Paula Mundy wants to stop going to study with you. This is a true story.

You are laughing, but I was very upset. Then in that same—the next year, my parents split. They were fighting.

I have three brothers, there are four brothers. Then father left. Mother kicked him out.

Then I—all of my friends have girlfriends. Then I'm thinking, it didn't work with Paula Mundy. Also with my father and my mother.

Then later, they both got cancer. Both of them were dying. In different cities.

Then I fly to California to see my father. I said, what happened with you and your mother? He said, I love her more than anybody.

But I cannot stay with her. Then I asked the mother, what do you think about the father? I love him more than anyone, I cannot stay with him.

Then I'm 13 years old. I'm very confused. They love each other more than anybody.

Therefore, they cannot stay together. Then I also tried in college. I had some relationships.

They always go up. You meet them. You chase them.

You catch them. You have a relationship. Collapse.

Then somebody says to you, who do you hate in the world? Paula Mundy. It's true.

Your ex-husband or your ex-boyfriend, you hate them. Your ex-husband or ex-girlfriend, you hate them. Then I thought, oh, I should become a monk.

This relationship is impossible. But then later I learned a lot. In the monastery.

In the monastery. Where are things coming from? Where does the world come from?

Where does the economy come from? Where does sickness come from? Where does a partner come from?

Then in the monastery they taught us a different system. You can plant money. And it will come.

You can plant good health. It will come. And you can plant a partner.

And it will come. And you can fix an old partner. Just understand how to plant the seeds.

So today I want to talk about that. And maybe it will help you. So let's go to second page.

Then I have a friend. She lives in America. She was born in America.

But her parents are Chinese. She lives in New York. And she is very successful.

Can you show the next slide please? Then she came to me one day. Geshe-la, Geshe-la, Can I ask you advice?

Then I said, what do you need? She said, I need a mo. I'll show you a mo.

Next slide. Do you have dice there? Yeah.

This is a dice. Then there's a custom. A Buddhist monk.

If the person has a question, or they have to make a choice, they can come to the monk. And they say, will you do mo? Mo means tell the future.

What choice should I make? Then I don't like mo. I think people should make their own decisions.

But sometimes you can help people with mo. So I said, okay, I will do mo. I learned mo from Mongolian monks.

They don't use dice. They use a bone. From a sheep.

And they clean it. It's like a cube. And they put numbers on it.

Then they go to the cemetery. They cut the skull from a person. And they make a cup.

Then they shake it like that. Then, I don't like it. And I don't do it.

But I thought, I can help her. I will do a good show. So I took the dice.

Then you should put your eyes like that. Then you should say some prayer. Then...

Then I said, what's a choice? She said, I want a boyfriend. I want a boyfriend.

So what's a choice? Can you tell the future? Will I meet him in the internet?

Or will I meet him in the nightclub? You want me to make this choice? You want me to make this choice?

Yes, please. Okay. What's getting on?

He's not on the internet. Next slide. She's happy.

I said, why are you so happy? The boy that you find on the internet, he will spend all day on the computer. He won't talk to you.

Like him. He will be on Facebook all day. He doesn't talk to his girlfriend.

I'm glad he's not on the internet. So he's on the nightclub, right? Next slide.

He's not in the nightclub. No, he's not in the nightclub. Then she said, ah, that's good.

Then I said, why? She said, the boy who goes to the nightclub is the kind of boy who goes to the nightclub. So, he will always go to the discotheque, he won't tell me.

So, I'm happy. So, where will I find him? Next slide.

I told her, you go to a nursing home. Then, she's very funny. Excuse me one minute.

This is my teacher. Then, she's very funny. Okay.

I said, you have to go to a nursing home. Then she's like, Geshe-la, you don't understand. I want a young boy.

Then I said, no, no, you don't understand. Why do you want a boyfriend? Then, she's a very successful person.

She went to Yale University. She has an architecture degree. She said, I have a good job in New York.

I love my job. I like to stay late at my job. Because I love architecture.

Then I come home. On the way home, I have to stop in the market. And I have to buy some vegetables, to cook for dinner.

Then I come to my house. Nice apartment, big apartment. Very high in New York.

Very expensive. She opens the door. Go inside.

It's about eight rooms. Then she goes to the kitchen. Cook the food.

Big dining room table. Sit down. Eat.

By herself. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to tell about my job.

Looking out the window, New York City. Then, finish. Clean up the food.

Go to bed. Then I said, so you are lonely. She said, yes, I'm lonely.

And I said, that's why you want a boyfriend. She said, yes. And I said, you studied with me for some years.

If you want money, how do you get money? She said, you have to plant money. Where do you plant money?

You must find another person who wants to make money. Then you must help them to make money. That plants a seed in your mind.

Then you can make a hundred million dollars. Just plant it. Then I said, if you want a boyfriend, if you don't want to be lonely, how do you do that?

Then she said, oh, nursing home. I have to go to nursing home. I have to take care of an old person who is lonely.

And then that will plant the seed. Then I said, yes. Then you can go to the nightclub.

Boy will come. Or you can go to the internet. Boy will come.

Or you can sit in your house. He will knock on the door. Somebody asked me a question.

They said, I'm going to try that. I will plant the seed for a girlfriend. Then I will sit in my house.

Let's see if it's true. She will come to me. She did.

She knocked on the door. It's an amazing story. In New York.

So, if you want a partner, you just have to plant the seed. Yesterday we talked about business. We said there were four steps.

If you want to make a million dollars or a hundred million dollars. Money is not dirty. This is a business school.

This is the most famous business school in Peru. And I think it's the most beautiful. Then, why are they teaching people how to make money?

With money you can help people. If you make money honestly, then you can help many people. If you have a good business, compassionate business, which respects the environment, respects the rights of the workers, then you can support many of the workers and their families.

Money can be a good thing. And a lot of money can be a good thing. With our company's money we are helping Tibetan refugees.

This year is 25th anniversary. 25 years helping them. If you know how to use money to help people, it can be a beautiful thing.

So, yesterday we said there are... So, there is a reason to have a school like this. To teach people to make successful companies, which are compassionate, respect the environment, help the workers, help them to come up.

So, this is a great school for that. Then we said there are four steps. For money.

Number one. Decide what you want. Make a goal.

I want a million dollars. Step number two. Make a plan in your mind.

I will help somebody else to start their own company. Voluntarily. I will give time to them.

I will give money to them. That's a plan. Step number three.

What you plan to do, you have to actually do. Help the other person to start their company. When I started my company, I started to help the refugees to make their own company.

Now it's 25 years. I didn't stop. I still want to plant the seed.

That's step number three. Step number four is called coffee meditation. You come home, make some coffee, relax, think about how I helped the other person.

I took my friend to Starbucks coffee shop and I gave them some advice how to start a company. Then review all of the good things in your mind. My Tibetan lama, we lived together for 25 years.

His name is Khen Rinpoche. Very great man. Then one day we got telephone call from the church, Catholic church.

The priest called my lama. This was Pope John Paul's time, I think. Then they said, Pope John Paul made a recommendation.

All of the churches should invite the other religion to give talk. So, will you come and talk about Buddhism? Then my teacher said, I'm very happy.

He saw John Paul on the television. And he admires him very much. So then he said, I will come.

Then we went to a big cathedral. Very, very big. And we are going to the front to give the talk.

And then we are walking there. Then with the priest. Then my lama saw there's a small room on the side.

Then one priest went into the room. Then one lady went into the room from the other door. Then he asked the priest, what are they doing in there?

Then the priest said, this is confession. The lady did something wrong. She wants to tell the priest.

Then the priest will give her prayers to do. Then my lama said, that's very good. We do the same thing.

We call the prayers mantra. And if you do something wrong, the priest should tell you to do the mantra. Then he touched the priest like that.

Where's the other room? What room? The other room.

Where the priest should go. And the person should come. Second room.

Then the priest said, why? The person who did the good thing, they should come and tell the priest. Then together they can celebrate.

Rejoice, confessional and rejoicinal. On one side the confessional, and on the other the rejoicinal. So, we say, when you plant the seed, you took your friend to the coffee shop, you gave them some advice on how to make more money.

Then when you come home, you should think about it. Usually us people, before we go to bed, we are tired. Then, Tibetans say, evil spirit comes in your mind when you are tired.

[Speaker 2]
Then you start to worry.

[Speaker 1]
My son is not listening to me. My sister borrowed money, didn't give back to me. Then we sleep, with worry.

In this system, before you sleep, relax, think about today, I took somebody to the Starbucks, I gave them some good advice, I did a good thing. If you are a Christian, you can say, God will be happy. I did a good thing.

Then you should sleep like that. Then the whole night the mind is thinking about the good thing. And that plants many more seeds while you are sleeping.

Many people ask me, what's your secret? What's the business secret? Two hundred million dollars.

Relax. Before sleeping, think about the people that you help. Think about the people who help you.

In your mind thank them. Then you sleep, it's very good. And more and more seeds in your mind.

You can—this is real meditation. Thank you. Meditation is not, oh you have to go like this.

You can do, but your knee will hurt. Then, if you sit on your bed, when you are in high school, you are thinking about Paula Monday. You are not like this.

You are like this. Then your mother says, did you clean your room? Huh?

That's real meditation. Because your mind is focused. About Paula Monday.

So, I thought today. Some people told me last night, I enjoyed your talk, but I'm not clear what I'm supposed to do. If you want to make money, four steps.

Decide, what do you want? Money. Million dollars.

Then, who will I help? Number two. Make a plan.

Because you must help somebody else to make money if you want to have money. Step number two. Make a plan.

Decide a person. I will take this person to Starbucks coffee shop. I will give them advice.

You can go to this website, you can find your product. I have three friends who make good worker for you. Step two is in your mind.

Step three. Starbucks. Go to Starbucks.

It also helps American economy. That's the last great American company. Go to Starbucks, help them.

Step number four. Rejoice and all. Rejoice and all.

And think about the good thing you're doing. So, are we clear? Four steps.

Begin tomorrow. What do you want? Step number one.

Step number two. Make a plan. Who will you help to get the same thing which you want?

Step number two. Step number three. Starbucks.

Okay, go to Starbucks. Take them to Starbucks. Or go to the nursing home.

Or you can take the old lady to Starbucks. Tomorrow I have to leave, the airplane leaves at one o'clock. My friend Jose de la Boda, he's coming at 9.30 exactly. Why? We are going to this store called Al Alpaca. Alpaca?

Why? I have to buy Alpaca sweater for my old lady. Every country I go to, I have to bring something home.

I have an old lady for twenty years. I am planting many seeds with her. My friends, they want to know, what is her address?

I'm not telling you. She's my old lady. She is my farm.

I plant my seeds with her. We have to find good Alpaca sweater tomorrow. Okay.

That's step two. Three. Take her to Starbucks.

Take her out of this home, it's bad. These homes are bad. In Peru you are very good.

You don't put your parents in these homes. Most people keep them at home. But still, sometimes you should take them to Starbucks.

Don't leave them in the dark room. Take them out to walk. Take them to have some fun.

Then you plant many seeds for your relationship. So those are the four steps. If you don't remember anything from these talks, remember those four things.

What do you want? Choose a person, make a plan. Take them to Starbucks.

Then go home. Think about the good thing you did. That's all.

You want to make a million dollars? You can do. Just those four things.

You want to find a good partner? Those four things. You want to fix your partner?

Then you have to stay one hour more here. We will talk about it. Then I thought, let's practice step number two.

Together let's practice step number two. Then there are many good teachers of this system in Lima. Andres, Maria Rita, Claudia, Jose, they can teach you.

If you have questions you can ask them. So, I'm going to ask Claudia to come up. She will do step number two with us.

It's like a meditation. If she tells you to sit up straight, it's okay, you can go like this. Okay, here we go.

[Speaker 2]
Do it up and down. Let's start the same way. Let's sit comfortably.

As comfortable as you can. Keep your eyes on your right shoulder. If you can see it.

And let's close our eyes. Let's stay. Let's close our eyes.

And let's focus first on breathing. Let's visualize how the air comes out and enters the nostrils. Let go of your shoulders.

Relax the muscles of the face. Relax your eyes. Relax your nose.

Relax your mouth. Relax your mouth. Let go of your hand.

Relax your arms. Your hands. Let go of your legs.

Your feet. And let's focus on breathing. Let's visualize how the air enters and leaves the nostrils.

Let go of your shoulders. And now let's visualize that person, that old lady, that person who is alone. And let's go there, to the city, to the ancient city.

You are going to think that you are going to go to the city. You imagine how it is, how it is dressed. You are going to go to buy a banana.

You are going to go to Brazil. You are going to feel good. You are going to be happy.

You are going to say goodbye to her. And you talk to her. You realize that she is alone.

That she doesn't listen to you well. That you want to repeat things many times. But instead you have patience.

And you are going to repeat them. She tells you her stories. But rarely repeated.

And you listen to her. Those stories you probably already know. But you listen to her.

You see how she is happy to be able to talk to people. To share with someone. She is happy.

She is feeling good. That monster is talking to her. You are listening to her.

You are her presence. She is talking to you. You are listening to her.

You don't have to imagine so many stories in your head. Now you can tell them. She is happy.

She is feeling good. You see how something is changing. In her face.

[Speaker 1]
Thank you. So, we will take a break. Just ten minutes, okay?

Okay? Because Geshe Michael talked too much. Then, I will stay here.

If you want to sign a book. Take photos. So, we'll start, because we don't have much time.

Page three. Page three. Maria Rita.

Seven o'clock? Okay. Okay.

What is this pregunta tres? What should one search in a partner? People ask me, what should I look for in my partner?

Should I look for someone who is intelligent? Or someone who is handsome? Or someone who has a lot of money?

Jesus said. Or who is sensitive? And loyal to me?

And loves to help the country and other people? People ask me, you are a monk. What should I look for?

They think I should say, he should be spiritual. Should be a nice person. Doesn't matter if he's handsome.

Doesn't matter if he's rich. I don't agree. I agree with her.

Should be everything. Okay? If you buy a new car, where's the next thing?

Next thing. If you buy a new car. You should buy a good one.

You should have everything that you want. If you are looking for a new partner. If you already have a partner, I think you should upgrade to first class.

[Speaker 2]
Next slide.

[Speaker 1]
Okay? Okay. Then, it means, if I ask you, do you love your husband?

Of course I love my husband. Are you happy? Pretty happy.

Do you want to stay with him? Yes. If you could change anything, would you like to change?

What would you like to change? He doesn't wash the dishes. I come home, I say, hug me.

He hugs his laptop. Like, I love my husband, but I want to upgrade him. Then, we have to talk about that.

How to improve? Nothing is impossible. You can change everything.

If you are married for 25 years, you can change anything about your partner. Or you didn't find your partner yet, you can order him like a new car. I want this color.

I want this kind of inside. I want a good DVD player. You can choose what you want.

Why? We said it yesterday. Maybe most of you were here, I think.

We will do a little bit from yesterday. Just for three minutes. Because it will help you to design your new partner.

Or it will help you to upgrade your old partner. So, just three, four questions. What is this thing?

Pen. If a dog comes here, and I show it to the dog, do they see a pen? No.

What do they see? Something to chew. Who is correct, the dog or the human?

Both. If I put this thing here, and Andres and me and our friends, we go to a restaurant, everybody goes home, dog also leaves, at that time, which one is it? Is it a pen?

Or is it chew toy? Which one? Nada.

It's a good answer. So now, last question. Is the pen coming from me?

Or is the pen coming from the pen? Which one? It must be from me.

If it's coming from the pen. If the pen is a pen, then the dog will write a poem to his girlfriend and say, you have a nice tail. But he won't write.

He doesn't see a pen. It means the pen is not a pen. If I see a pen, it's coming from my mind.

There is a seed in my mind. There is a seed in my mind. We can talk for several days about that seed.

Today we don't have time. But that seed, it's in the subconscious mind. It is made of light.

And then one day, it seed opens. And there is a small picture of a pen, this big. Made of light.

Only this big. When the seed opens. That picture comes out of your mind.

To this stick. And then you see a pen. This is why you see a pen.

And the dog has a Chitwa picture. Everything you ever saw in your life is coming from your mind. Every person you ever met in your life is coming from your mind.

From a seed in your mind. And every quality of every person you ever met was also coming from a seed in your mind. If you see your husband as angry, there is an angry seed in your mind.

If you see your husband as affectionate, this is also coming from a seed in your mind. So now we just have one job, then we can finish. Tell me the seed.

For all of these different things. New boyfriend has money. Handsome.

Intelligent. Sensitive. Loyal.

Loves my family. How to plant these things? You can change your husband or your wife after 25 years, doesn't matter, you can change.

Or before you meet somebody you can change them. Let's go to page four. Then I will talk about a person who already has a relationship.

I will talk about a person who already has a relationship. Then people come to me. They say, when I first met my husband, he's very passionate.

He will write poetry for me. He takes me to the nice restaurant. He buys me some jewelry.

He gets the best wine. Now? Nothing.

He just comes home. Watch television. He doesn't even say hello to me.

Let me see next slide. What is that? This is a tree.

This is near my lama's house. Then I like this tree. Then I think about this tree.

It will make us. It's called cottonwood. Cottonwood.

Algon... wood. Yeah.

And the seed looks like cotton. It's this big. And this tree is unbelievable.

I like to sleep under that tree. Then it grew from a seed. This big.

Now I have a question for you. Where is that seed? Which grew this tree?

Where's the seed? It's gone. It died.

Who killed the seed? The tree. When the tree grows, it kills the seed.

So, I'll tell you a story. The Chinese girl. Can you find that?

You might have to go backwards or you don't want to try. She went to visit the old lady. She listened to my advice.

Then she was teaching yoga also. She sent me an email. Geshe-la, your four Starbucks steps doesn't work.

No boy came. Then I said, keep going, keep going. Then she kept going to the old lady.

Then one day she went to Los Angeles to teach a class. Yoga class. Then yoga class is a bad place to look for a boyfriend.

Because mostly girls. But, she started the class. She doesn't see any boy.

I don't know if the system works or not. Then the door opens. Then one boy walks in.

He's a famous TV director. Then he goes, ah. She goes, ah.

Then, connection. Connection. That boy came from a seed.

She planted that seed in the nursing home. When she took the old lady to Starbucks, when she made a plan where to go for alpaca, sweater for the old woman, when she came home and relaxed and think about what the good things she did, she created this boy. Don't look for a partner.

Create one. Plant one. Don't look for money.

Plant it. Then it will come. When he opened the door, the seed from visiting the old woman opened in her mind.

His name is Stefan. He's this big. He is in her mind.

When the seed opens, then the seed comes out. Creates a boy. Then she called me.

It works! Somebody, my friend, made a t-shirt. This stuff really works.

Then she called me. After six months. Now you are a monk.

Please come to New York. We are getting married. We want you to do the ceremony.

So I went to her apartment. Then I have to do the ceremony. Then everyone's happy, especially her parents.

They want a grandchild. They are very happy. Then after the wedding we were having some food.

This picture was taken during the food. Then I asked Jessica, how is your old lady? Then she got embarrassed.

Oh, I was so busy. I have to buy the wedding dress. Prepare the food.

You know, I have to send the invitations. I didn't see her for one month. Then I said, you sit down.

You can see they are sitting. Sit down. I said, where did Stefan come from?

Seed. How did you plant the seed? I went to the nursing home.

What happens to the seed when the tree grows? It dies. The growing of the tree kills the seed.

The growing of the tree kills the seed. Do you have the slide about a graph? I don't know.

Can you find it? Next one, next one, next one. Good.

This is your Paula Monday. The beginning I meet her. Marsha Cooksey gave me a letter.

Marsha gave me that note under the table. Then happier, happier, happier, happier. Then ...

This is the graph of every relationship in your life also. You had this graph many times. Beginning is very happy.

Then reaches peak. Then something changes. The guy changes.

He was so nice. Now he's always arguing with me. I have good news for you.

It's not your fault. What's happening? The seed is opening.

Opening, opening, opening, opening, opening. Then the relationship kills the seed. And it ...

The tree must fall down. The seed grows into the tree. Every hour that the tree lives, the power of the seed is going down.

You must lose your partner. The seed will die. Maybe you will start fighting.

Maybe he will become boring. Maybe he loses affection for you. Or maybe one of you dies.

One of those will happen. It would always happen. Then how do we ...

what do we do? Go back to ... can you find Jessica's picture again?

So I told Jessica, you are very stupid to ignore the old lady. You are not finished. You must keep planting a seed every week or every two weeks.

You must continue to help her. You cannot stop going to the races for the rest of your life. You must visit somebody who is lonely.

Once a week. Once every two weeks. Because if ...

the old seed which created him is going to die. Why? Because you met him.

Meeting him killed the seed. You must keep planting seeds. You can't stop.

You and him should go together. Before you have your baby child, you can have old lady child. And you should take care of her.

All during your marriage. It will keep the marriage fresh. And it won't stop.

My relationships ... I have an old lady for twenty years. My relationship is going up every day.

Forty-one years. More and more happy. More and more beautiful.

You just have to keep planting the seed. Page five. So my husband ...

Oh, it's seven o'clock. Can I keep you for ten more minutes, okay? Okay.

Ten or ... It's a Lima ten minutes.

[Speaker 2]
Let's say fifteen minutes.

[Speaker 1]
I promise fifteen minutes. So my husband is not affectionate anymore. I understand.

Can you do the graph again? I understand. The seed goes up.

Then it ... Seed will die. Tree will die.

I understand. But what seed should I plant that my husband will be again affectionate? When he sees me he will laugh and he will hug me.

Next one. Next slide. Not that one.

You have a hug. Yeah, like that. I want my husband to hug me.

Then you have to plant the seed. Yesterday we talked about the four qualities of all seeds. Number one.

You must plant the same thing that you want. If you want money, help other people to make money. If you want a promotion in the university, help the other professor to get a promotion.

If you want a partner, help a lonely person. If you want affection, you must give friendship. You must plant the seed.

When you walk in Lima, when you go to the store, when you go to the restaurant, give everybody a smile. Good day. How are you?

Good day to you. That's all. I gave this talk in Norway.

Last year. One guy raises his hand. My wife never kisses me.

So, I believe your system. I'm going to the restaurant tonight. I'm going to kiss every girl in the restaurant.

I will plant the seed. I said, I think this seed will get some trouble for you. The seed can be small.

The tree is big. So, if you want your husband to hug you for twenty more years, just make a new habit. When you are in the store, you see somebody, just smile.

Hello. How are you? That's all.

The seed is small. The tree is big. Then your husband will hug you.

After the first hug, don't stop. Don't start going like this to people. Still you have to smile.

You have to plant hugs for next week. Don't forget, okay? And you try this one for a while.

We need a new one. You good? You go, you go.

Okay, that's the seed for hug. We are on page five. Number two.

My husband gives me hugs, but I want ... Mercy, next one. Passion.

That's not passion. What's the next one?

[Speaker 2]
That's passion.

[Speaker 1]
So many ... Some guys come to me. I love my wife, but after she had second baby, she doesn't want to have any sex with me.

There's no passion in our life. How to change that? Then again you have to plant a seed.

What is the seed for passion? I'll tell you something interesting. If you see someone who loves what they do ...

Yesterday I went to lunch with Dr. Mindoro. Then I don't know him very well, but we had a nice lunch. And he's talking about his ideas.

Whole lifetime of ideas for education. And his dream for this place in the future. Then you can see he has passion.

He loves to help people. He loves to teach. He loves to help create a place for teaching.

Then how do I feel when I meet somebody? Human being, most of us, especially me, I get jealous. Oh look, he has such a beautiful place.

His staff is fantastic people. They have everything. Human nature, when you see a successful person, you feel jealous.

Oh, he's bigger than me. Then, if you want passion, you must plant the seed. What is the seed?

Passion. When you see passion, be happy. Celebrate passion.

You have passion. I love to see your passion. A whole lifetime of teaching, still you love to talk about it.

I love your passion. Or you see someone who likes cooking, or music, anything, doesn't matter. Two days ago I went to the beach.

Why? Peru's surfing team is number one last year. In the world.

I love to see good surfers. Then I used to surf. Then, now I love to watch them.

Then I just feel happy.

[Speaker 2]
Wow, look at that guy.

[Speaker 1]
He's fantastic. How to make your wife more passionate? You must enjoy the passion of other people.

And you must cut jealousy. Jealousy stops passion. So, if you want your wife to be passionate, walk through your life.

Look for passion. Who has passion? Oh, that's great.

Then it puts a seed in your mind. This big. Comes out.

When you are with your wife. Then I'm a monk, I cannot tell you about this picture.

[Speaker 2]
Okay. Okay.

[Speaker 1]
So, I'd like to talk a little bit about this step number four. How to make the seed grow strong. We talked about four steps.

Decide what you want. I want a partner. Number two.

Make a plan. Claudia gave us a meditation. Do this meditation.

Number three. Take the old lady to... Starbucks.

Then step number four. Go home. Do another meditation.

Like this. Then Miguel is going to help us with this meditation. Then we are finished.

I need a chair. Don't cheat. We can sit together.

Gracias. Thank you. We are going to close our eyes.

We are going to stretch our legs. We are going to play.

[Speaker 2]
We are going to do this meditation.

[Speaker 1]
Then we are all going to close our eyes.

[Speaker 2]
We are going to meditate. We are going to focus on this breathing. We are going to meditate.

[Speaker 1]
And we are going to see how the air comes in. Softly.

[Speaker 2]
And comes out.

[Speaker 1]
Let's imagine that this conference is over. We have gone home. It has been a long day.

It started early. We did a lot of things. But all week we were very busy.

[Speaker 2]
But now it's time to rest. Let's imagine this room. This is our bed.

We are going to sleep. Let's close our eyes. Mmm.

Delicious. It's time to rest. It's time to rest.

[Speaker 1]
But before we fall asleep, we are going to do a review. We are going to do this. I'm comfortable.

[Speaker 2]
I'm comfortable. I'm super comfortable. I stretch my legs.

I relax my arms.

[Speaker 1]
I fix my body. I have a flexion. I stretch my neck.

I stretch my back. Let's try to relax.

[Speaker 2]
Let's remember how a few months ago we felt alone.

[Speaker 1]
We had a good life. I couldn't complain.

[Speaker 2]
I have a good job. I have good children. I like my job.

[Speaker 1]
It allows me to live with dignity, power and comfort. But I realize that at that moment something was missing. I felt alone.

I wanted to have a partner. I remember that I only wanted it fervently. And when I received him, I did a plan.

I did a research. For every child, where could I find people who were alone? And I felt alone.

I knew what that meant. I knew that this person alone, perhaps alone, would be feeling the same, or perhaps a little worse. Years went by.

And they were there, waiting for someone to come and visit them. But it didn't happen. It didn't happen.

It didn't happen. So we looked in the newspaper, in the newspapers, through friends, where could I find a person who was alone? And that's how I connected him with other children.

Years went by. I remember that I became a little nervous.

[Speaker 2]
How would that visit be? But one year I went. I found a place.

[Speaker 1]
To be honest, a little sad. There were a lot of people there, but I didn't feel good. I talked to some people and I found a good lady.

This lady inspired me a lot, a lot, a lot, to share with him. I remember I introduced myself. Who surprised you?

Who is this boy? Who is this person who comes to your house with me? Maybe at first with a little distrust, but little by little we started to talk.

[Speaker 2]
And I stole his first smile. And that, in turn, made me smile.

[Speaker 1]
And so we started to be together, we talked, we met each other. And I promised to come back. And I came back.

I came back several times. And because of that, I knew that he, for example, all this heat, all these days full of heat, I missed him a lot. And I would be lying when I remembered how beautiful it was to be on the beach.

And so I decided that we would go to the beach one day. I told him. We met.

We met. And I told him the same thing. And in the morning, we went to the beach.

[Speaker 2]
How he enjoyed it. Many years that he was there, playing in the sand, like a child, like an adult.

[Speaker 1]
And so he told me, I wanted to bathe. Ok, let's go. He held my hand and said, I'm going to bathe.

And he explained to me. And I remember perfectly how happy he was. How with his eyes he looked at me.

I felt that gratitude for what I was doing with him. However, that was a great gratitude. Just as we were helping each other, we went back.

He touched my hair. We went back. He touched my hair.

I left it in his place.

[Speaker 2]
I promised him that next week we would have another baby. And well, it was late. I came to the conference.

[Speaker 1]
And I'm here in my bed, calm, totally satisfied. It has been a good day. I rejoice, I am very happy about what I did.

It causes me a lot of joy to feel, to perceive all the joy that this lady, my lady, felt for something so simple as maybe going to the theater. Maybe next time when I go somewhere else, for example, I don't know, a walk, I have to be happy. So I rejoice, I rejoice a lot about what I did.

[Speaker 2]
I feel that my dream is coming true.

[Speaker 1]
But how beautiful it is to rest like this, to sleep, with this image of happiness and the feeling again that I did something good in my life. I smile, I give myself a big smile, I take a deep breath, I relax, I close my eyes, I let go of my hands, I hug her, I close my eyes, and we start the moment again. Stay, stay.

We are finished, but just two more things to say. So, for three days now, we are talking about how to plant a good seed. Then, all of us, before we planted some bad seeds.

All of us have made mistakes. We have those bad seeds. Before they open, we should try to cut them.

Then, we didn't have time to talk about that today. So, I've asked all my friends who are teachers in Lima. Miguel, Andres, Margarita, Claudia, Jose.

I've asked them to teach a special class in about two weeks. You must know how to take out the bad seed. Then, they will teach in about two weeks.

They will send an email. Last thing. What will happen if you follow this system?

Then, you will visit the old woman. You will plant a seed. Then, the seed will open in your mind.

And a beautiful boy will come. Or your husband or your wife will change. Let's say you get the boyfriend.

Then, I think you should call all of your friends on the telephone. Let's have dinner together. Then, call the boy.

Come to dinner. Then, tell your friends to come to dinner at seven o'clock. You should come late.

I think seven thirty. Bring the boyfriend. Into the restaurant.

Then, all your girlfriends are watching you. Three years you couldn't find a boyfriend. Look at this guy.

Somebody say, no, no, that's probably her cousin. Then, sit down. Tell the boy to give you a good kiss.

Then, everybody knows, oh, she got the boyfriend. Before you go to dinner, make the boyfriend drink a lot of water. Why?

After half an hour, he will go to the bathroom. Then, all of your friends, how did you find him? What's the website?

Which club? Then, what are you going to say? Nursing home.

[Speaker 2]
Huh?

[Speaker 1]
Nursing home. Then, they'll ask you, what are you talking about? Then, I want you to teach them what I taught you today.

Then, it will spread. Then, they will bring their boyfriend to the restaurant. And, they will tell their friends about the nursing home.

We can start a boyfriend revolution. I'm not kidding. Then, everybody's.

All the nursing homes. Long lines. I want to meet the old lady.

Come back on Wednesday. She's busy today. Okay.

Then, when you visit the old woman, you must have this vision in your mind. Buddhist people call it bodhichitta. It's a vision in your mind.

What will happen if I am successful? If this new system works for me, then I can show other people. Then, they will show other people.

There will be no more lonely old people. Happiness in the whole world. You must have this vision when you use this system.

When you go to Starbucks, think long lines at all the nursing homes. Then, we can really help the whole world. Okay.

Good night. Thank you.