«Дар освобождения», курс 32 «Пустое приходящее, ментальные бомбы», занятие 3

[Speaker 1]
Okay, good. Please remember not to move when you're meditating in a group, okay? Please remember to try not to move.

All right, okay, here we go, and please relax your forehead, relax your mouth, corners of your mouth, check your fingers, are they tight? Stomach in slightly, eyelids soft, forehead soft, and then please come to your breath. Long exhales, push out the extra breath, and try to glue your mind to your breath.

Try to make sure your mind is touching your breath as the breath goes in and out. Then I'd like you to check the condition of your mind. Is it pretty smooth?

I think in the morning, most of us, the mind is pretty calm, so check in with your mind. How smooth is it? How quiet is the water?

Now I'd like you to think of a friend that you have who is a very calm person, good person. So, in our life we have a few friends who have a good effect on us when we spend time with them. They're always doing nice things.

They treat other people well. They say nice things to other people. They're kind, they're respectful, considerate of other people.

So, I'd like you to go through a list of your friends and pick out one who could sit with us today, across from us. So, instead of our Lama, instead of our teacher or our parents, we are sitting across from good friend, good person. Then check in with your, the water of your mind again.

How smooth is it? And you might also check your heartbeat and your breathing. Has the water changed after you brought your good friend to meditate with you?

Then we all have friends who are not so nice. Maybe they criticize people a lot or don't speak nicely to people. Maybe they're a little bit selfish.

Still, we spend time with them. So, I'd like you to switch the person meditating with you and make it one of your friends who's not a very nice person. And after they start meditating with you, let's see how's the water in your mind?

How's your heartbeat? How's your breathing? Let's check.

Is there any difference between the state of your mind and your heartbeat and your breathing when these two friends are around you? Now, a different scene. You are in your retreat cabin this evening or this afternoon and you're alone in your room.

And you're not meditating, but you're just relaxing, sitting, maybe enjoying the nature here, the sky. At sunset, for example, it's very beautiful here. You're just sitting and looking out the window at the sunset.

And how does your mind-water feel? How's the breathing? How's the heartbeat?

The last part, please think about all the things you have to do next week when you come home. Things that have been waiting for you, responsibilities, bills, tasks for your job, things you have to do for your work. Try to think of some of them and see what it does to your heartbeat, your breathing, and the peace of your mind, the water of your mind.

Then please come back to morning mind, Diamond Mountain. Come back to the state of mind you had when we started the meditation. Quiet, peaceful, three long exhales, and then slowly open your eyes and take a stretch.

Drink something, okay? Drink something. You guys have a microphone ready?

Okay. Anybody want to talk about how did your mind change? Three kinds of mind, one is morning at Diamond Mountain, and one is sitting with a friend who's a good person, and one is sitting with a friend who's not a very nice person, and how did your breath change?

How did your heartbeat change? How did the water in your mind change? Anybody want to talk about it?

Ronit? Bokor or Bokor To? Bokor or Bokor To?

You couldn't find one? You're a lucky person. Okay, so you don't need Lamrim.

Yeah, yeah, no, it's fine. Yeah, you're lucky. Yeah, okay, cool.

Anybody else? Yeah, cool, okay. Hatho?

Nicole? Good, yeah, good, yeah. Okay, good.

Yeah, good. Anybody else? Thank you, Krishna, for the beautiful experience.

It's wonderful. So, when I was in the mood of the water, I feel the water is calm, and then when I think about the friend that I like, I feel like the water is getting warmer. Good.

But it's getting a little colder, and then it's not that fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Thank you, teacher, for teaching. Coming here, I think I'm starting to get nervous. It's a very good place to be.

[Speaker 2]
But when you asked us to invite our good friends, I was very surprised. Maybe that's how I found a seat for these friends of mine. And we were together with Jenny.

Then I tried to bring my new friend. And then suddenly another person came to my mind.

[Speaker 1]
Recently they come to my company to help, and suddenly they left. Then I feel a little bit upset that I left them. 然后我就想,哦,原来以为是好朋友的好朋友不一定是好朋友,然后你认为这是好朋友的朋友,可能他是你生活中最好的朋友。

But I realized something that the friend I thought is my real friend might not be the real friend I thought, and the friend that I thought is not my real friend might not be the best friend of mine. Okay, behind, behind, very patient.

[Speaker 2]
I'm sure my morning mind is not excited, and it's like, oh, I'm so happy to see you, let's do this, let's do that together. So, in the water, for example, there are some people that I see and they ask, well, my mind was frozen in water, and I felt desperate. I saw a wall behind me, and then I reached and I felt a friend.

[Speaker 1]
That's what I felt. Cool, okay. Anyone else?

Jingmei. Is that your friend? No, I just wanted to say, I had not talked to you for this morning.

So, I think I won't do that again. Okay. One more.

Oh, no? Yeah? Okay.

Norbert.

[Speaker 2]
Okay. Thank you, Geshe-la, for teaching. I really enjoyed being with my friend.

It was very calm. And then when I was thinking of my company, my heart was racing.

[Speaker 1]
Very speedy. He sells Audis.

[Speaker 2]
Like a machine, it was, and the mind was very, very, the water was not here at all. And when I imagined the sunset, I couldn't feel my heart at all.

[Speaker 1]
Okay, okay. Okay, cool. Pasha?

Pavan? It felt good, I feel, thinking about the next day, so. First of all, I also had a little more coffee than I was supposed to.

So the heart should calm down. The presence of my good friend, who is a very kind person, really helped. It made me feel warm, and it helped me calm down.

And then when I thought about it, I don't really want to call that person a friend. I'd rather call them a nice person. I did feel colder, and I felt some tremor.

It was really very similar to an anticipation of trouble. Thinking that we're in trouble, and we don't know where to come from. And then when I started thinking of going back, I had this ulcer tremor, but the tremor was positive.

The warmth was an excitement of ... Every time I feel excitement of having a chance to apply all the things that I'm gathering here. So I'm excited with anticipation.

[Speaker 2]
So it was tremble, but with anticipation of good things to come and good things to do.

[Speaker 1]
So, it was very positive, I feel. Cool, cool. So those are ...

We're going to go back to the Lam Rim, okay? We're going to start ... Because we've been going kind of slow, which is what Geshe-la does.

There are six triggers for klesha. There are six triggers for negative thoughts. And we did one of them the other day, and that's where you think about ...

You get in the presence of someone who's causing you trouble, okay? So, in Tibetan that's called mikpa. Presence of the object.

So, the thing that you have an addiction for. Someone comes in the room eating a doughnut, and Geshe-la's desire klesha starts to get strong. Or someone comes in the room, especially if you didn't expect them, and you had trouble with them in the past, and the presence of the object, whether it's a doughnut or someone you had a fight with before, it starts to put you off balance, right?

And those of you who studied DCI level 10, this is the preliminary to getting upset, and getting upset is the preliminary to anger, and anger is the preliminary for ... resentment, you know, holding it for weeks or months or years. There's a big joke, a nun ...

I went to a talk by a Buddhist nun, and she said something cool, she said ... you know, the ex-boyfriend who called you stupid, he forgot about it the next day, but you still remember 20 years later. You still hold it, you still remember these fights you had with people.

So, the first ... there's six triggers for klesha, there are six triggers, and we're going through them, man manda, very slow. First trigger, the person, yeah the object, the person or the doughnut comes in the room, okay?

And then the breath starts to speed up, the heart starts to speed up, and the morning diamond mountain peaceful mind water starts to get choppy, okay? And so, those are preliminary to getting ... so, it goes like that, off balance, first you get off balance, then you get upset, upset you still didn't say anything yet, angry, you say something, and then resentment, you hold it for weeks or months, okay?

After that, there's four steps to klesha, okay? Most kleshas. So, what we learned the other day is, one approach for beginners, lower school, because it ...

doesn't work all the ... yeah, it just works sometimes, try to avoid the person, or try to avoid doughnuts, you know? Ask your friends not to bring doughnuts in the room, okay?

And it's not a very good method, but it's better than nothing, right? And find out the address of your ex-husband, ex-wife, and never go to that city, make sure you follow their travel plans, and never meet them, you know? Okay?

And it's not easy, right? And it doesn't work very well. Karma will bring them to you somehow, or your friend will start talking about them, and your heart beats, speeds up, and your breath speeds up, okay?

So, that's called object factor, one of the six triggers for klesha, okay? Second trigger we had today is bad friends, we call dik drog, say dik drog, say chodok, dik drog, chodok. Drog means friend, okay?

Dik means bad, bad karma friend, and then chodok means a good karma friend, and generally chodok, if you hang out with them ... I was thinking about Rob Ruessinger, I don't think he's here, so I can talk about him. He's so nice, and he's so steady, and he's so humble, and he's so sweet, and he works so hard for all of us, he does all the accounting for a couple of projects, and perfectly, and ...

so when you're around him, your water stays calm, right? Called chodok, dharma friend, and then dik drog means, I don't know, you're around someone who's nervous, or gets irritated easily, or says bad things to people, and then it infects you, it affects your behavior, it speeds up your heart, normally speeds up your breath, okay? So, there's a tradition, lower school, okay?

Lower school, try to not hang out with those bad friends very often, try to hang out more with the Rob Ruessingers, okay? And, I don't know why, a couple people said bad friend's not really a friend, you know? Like, I had trouble thinking about a friend who's bad, because when a friend is bad, you don't want to be a friend, but to be honest, we all have bad friends, it seems like.

I don't know why we stay around them, but we do, and so, in the Dharma, in the Lam Rim, be careful with your choice of friends, and try to spend more hours with the nice friends, and then their habits, their behavior will rub off on you, it will infect you, and try to reduce the time you spend hanging with people who are angry people, or jealous people, okay? Because, no matter how hard you try, they will affect you, they will affect you, you will start to act like them. Okay, that's the second one, okay?

First one, object, you know? Lower school, avoid that trigger, you know? Geshe-la should never go to Dunkin Donuts at all, or Tim Horton, okay?

Just, I should just avoid it forever, and I try, you know, not real hard, but ... They have this bad thing in the airport, it's called Cinnabon, and I think they have a fan, and they send the smell of the Cinnabon throughout the airport, and it's really hard to not smell it, I guess that's their plan. So, the second thing is, who do you associate with, okay?

Who do you associate with? What was the third one, it's called dunzi, say dunzi. Dunzi, it's a good word for a word to learn.

Do you know it? Dunzi means too busy, overstimulated, okay? Too much to do, too much coffee, too many plans, too many thoughts, it's a very famous word, it's called dunzi, and ...

,'A'ON DAG ZHAG RGYUD MDU, ,'A'ON ZHAG RGYUD MDU, ,'MDUN ZHIG, Okay? And it just means, a breeding ground for kleshas is a busy mind, okay? And the internet is like 99% dunzi, okay?

And it's unfortunate, I mean, it's a good karma in our life, like it's revolutionizing Dharma teaching right? Or yoga, you can get a hundred classes on YouTube, thousand classes on YouTube for free, and that's wonderful, that's a great thing, but it also keeps your mind really busy and scattered, maybe dunzi is scattered mind in English, it means you're just thinking about too many things, and that's a good place, kleshas like to grow there, it's like fertilizer for kleshas okay? If you get too busy, your heartbeat speeds up, your breath speeds up, you feel like you're running a race right?

You're like ... you know, and that's a good place for kleshas to grow, okay? So, we've covered three triggers, okay?

The object comes in the room, you have friends who influence you, and then your mind is too scattered, and then it's more likely that you will get angry or you will have jealousy or desire, okay? So, part of the idea of Diamond Mountain is to ... temporarily right?

Help you with those three triggers, you know, you're in a cabin, your ex-wife probably won't come, then ... you're trying to be around good people here, you know, people are not going to come out here if they're not nice people, usually, and ... then third one is, you know, you're cut down, you're not so busy, right?

While you're here, unless there's a teacher training or something, okay, alright? So, we've discussed three triggers, now I'd like to go to the ... I'd like to go to the lamrim and start reading more lamrim.

Watch the three triggers, okay? This is lower school, it doesn't always work, okay? We didn't get to higher school.

Higher school is first trigger, okay? We didn't get to it yet, okay? Alright, here we go.