Серия ежедневной практики, курс 09 — Пустота ума (махамудра) (1999, Сокел), занятие 3

[Speaker 1]
Session 2 Satsang with Maitreya Monk Satsang with Maitreya Monk Okay, good morning. Today we're going to start with the meditation, because I think you're fresher in the first part of the class than the second part of the class. I think one of the things that Western people seek the most in Buddhism is some kind of definable spiritual progress.

Like, you'd like to get to a point where you say, I reached a certain stage, you know. I mean, that's why people are almost obsessed with statements in scripture about how long it takes to get to shamatha, you know, they're like, three months, four months, six months, I heard eight months, no, I heard eleven, but you have to do this, you know, and people think if they could just have some clear sign that they reached some kind of stage, you know, which bhumi am I on? Which path am I on?

You know what I mean? And you'd feel better if you could, if some lama could come along and say, okay, definitively you have reached number three, and this is why. You know, people would feel better, like Americans have this thing, you know, like when you're in school you get degrees and diplomas and certificates and, you know, you've made it to a certain place and it's very important to us.

And it's not silly, it'd be nice to know where you are, you know. Basically there's five levels that you can go through, five, what they call paths, and path here is a synonym for topa, meaning stage of realization. And generally speaking, if you reach them, you probably won't drop back from them, okay?

So, these are five very specific levels that each one of us has to go through, spiritual milestones. First one is true renunciation, you know, that's when you're really tired of things going up and down like a roller coaster, you know, that you're really, really, truly, honestly tired, and you'd be willing to give up anything if you could stop it. So, if somebody says, do you have a problem with doing a three-month retreat with Lama Serpa and Vajrasattva, you don't even hesitate, you don't worry about your other obligations.

I mean, it doesn't even occur to you to worry about it, you just want to do it, because you want to get out so bad. So you have this ability to renounce, to be unattached to what you have, and to go for it, if it's a real path that you have the... you've made a decision in your mind that you're tired of this process of things going up and down, and up and down, and whatever it was you were going to do during those three months, whatever you were hoping to achieve, it also is going to collapse someday.

And you get to the point where you realize that, and you just decide, you know, I'm willing to practice now. By the way, that doesn't mean that you have to quit your job, or divorce your wife, or stuff like that. It just means you have to look at it a different way now, and be willing to do what you have to do.

At the expense of those other things that aren't going to last. Second stage is called... By the way, that's called sok jor tong gom lam, path of accumulation.

You're accumulating energy, mainly to see emptiness. It takes that kind of energy to see emptiness. If you're on a Mahayana track, at that point, you're also thinking about other people, in the same sense, like, you know, I'm going to do this for other people.

The best thing I can do for other people is to get my own rear end into a Buddha paradise. You know, you hear people say, oh, he's a bodhisattva. You say, why?

He says, he always gives people a ride in his car, you know. Or something like that. But real bodhisattva is fixed.

In fact, the definition says fixed on the state of enlightenment. Like, I want to get there so I can be... so I can really show other people how to do it.

It's not so much thinking, I want to get there for myself. It's more like thinking, I have to do that, because then I have to show other people how to do it. It's like learning piano so you can teach other people to play piano.

Suppose learning piano, suppose being able to play piano was the best thing in the world, and you wanted to give that gift to everyone else in the world. Then first you'd have to learn how to play piano. People ask me, how much effort do you need to meditate on emptiness?

It's about the effort it takes to learn to play piano well. Okay? It's about like that.

Like any normal person in this room can do it, and it takes about that kind of discipline. I don't think you have to be like a concert pianist, okay? Just a pretty good pianist.

But it would take about... to think that you could see emptiness with less effort than that is foolish. It doesn't happen.

You know, you'd have to... you'd have to be or like to be a serious dancer. You know, the amount of effort it takes.

You'd have to... definitely two things would have to happen. You'd have to find a really good teacher who could dance already.

And then secondly, you'd have to... you'd have to be on the bar a couple hours a day. You know, there's no way to get out of it.

You have to, you know. And the same with scales, you know. Like I used to play sitar, and for years we would go into the room and the guru would say, go in the corner and play the scale for an hour.

And you'd say, no, no, I want to play like Ravi Shankar, you know. And they'd say, no, no. He got there this way, you know.

And you'd have to play scales for hours, you know. And it's the same thing. You have to put in the time.

It's very similar to learning to play a musical instrument or learning a sport well or something like that. So then, step number two, path number two is called jorlam, path of preparation, preparing to see emptiness directly. During that time, you're going through four levels of an increasingly sophisticated intellectual understanding of emptiness.

So, the idea that you can see emptiness just because you had a good breakfast and, you know, you fall a certain way on the ground on your head, you know, something like that is foolish. It's impossible. The Buddha never said that anywhere.

To see emptiness, you must go through, directly, you must go through stage number two, which is a lot of intellectual study of emptiness, okay? And along with that, contemplation, okay? We'll talk about that.

In our context here, it'd be the equivalent of me standing up there and explaining the different kinds of emptiness and riding the Tibetan underboard and talking would be what we call tu jung gi she rab means wisdom which comes from learning. And then, when I held up the pen and I said, okay, think about it, try to see it that way, that's called sam jung gi she rab. And that's called contemplative wisdom, the wisdom that comes from contemplation.

So, you have to go through those stages. Stage number two, spiritual level number two, is where you're getting very sophisticated in your understanding of emptiness through learning, hearing about it from a person who knows about it. And the chances of learning emptiness from someone who doesn't have a close experience with it is like trying to learn concert piano from someone who knows how to play, what's that thing?

Chopsticks, yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, the odds are about like that.

I mean, maybe somebody did it, but unlikely. By the way, is it impossible that at age 12 you have this insight into emptiness without meeting a teacher? Of course.

The scriptures say, yes, possible. Right after that, it always says, because in five million lifetimes you studied with somebody, and, you know, it just happens to be you don't have a teacher in this lifetime. So it's not impossible, it's just totally unlikely.

Then you get to the third level, which is to see emptiness directly. And that's really what I want to talk about. When I talked about getting to some level that you knew you were there, and you could say, okay, after a billion lifetimes, I know where I am.

I'm on level three. You know? And I have seven lifetimes to go.

Sixth. Definite. Nothing more than that.

I am out of here in seven lifetimes. I've seen it. Okay?

That'd be so comforting to reach that level, right? And to know directly that you're going to get enlightened, and to see directly your own enlightenment. You know, it'd be just...

That's what we seek. That's what your heart wants. You want some kind of confirmation that you're at a certain level.

You get that by doing Mahamudra Emptiness Meditation. That's what I'm saying. That's why I brought it up.

The real, only measure of where you are, as you can feel from a description of the five paths, is how good is your emptiness meditation. Did you get it or not? And then you add some kind of incontrovertible level, and a level that doesn't go back.

Once you reach tonglam, path of seeing, direct perception of emptiness, you never go back. You're changed forever. You're an Arya.

Okay? Arya means changed forever person. You know what I mean?

And you're a gyun-shuk. You're a stream-enterer. So, you can do it in this lifetime.

This meditation, what we're about to meditate on, get your motivation up. Think, you know, you could reach a level in this lifetime that you knew where you were, and you're not like Dharma rumors, you know, maybe I'm on level six. I kind of liked somebody yesterday that I didn't like usually, or something.

You know what I mean? And then the next day you get angry at your lama, and you know, everything. And then you're confused, what level am I on?

Did I get anywhere or not? Ten years later, am I any better or not? I don't know.

You don't have to live like that. Study Mahamudra. Get to the point of seeing emptiness directly.

You cannot go back. And you, pang ja means, you eliminate certain mental afflictions forever. Three, in fact.

And then you just get to a point where you know exactly where you're at. That would be so nice, in this lifetime, to get to a point to where you knew where you were. So you can do that.

It's about as difficult as learning the piano. Well, and if you don't put the time in, and you don't... You know, people come to me all the time with these confessions, you know.

I'm not meditating every day. So, you know, then you're just killing yourself. You know, you're murdering yourself.

You know, it's not like Lama Tsongkhapa is going to be mad at you or something. It's not the point. You're literally, you know, making very clear efforts to murder yourself.

You know, and and you'll die like that. It's not for anybody else. It's, it's to see emptiness.

You have to. You have to meditate an hour a day of good meditation, which means, you know, an hour and a half of time, because 15 minutes on each side is getting settled and doing your preliminaries. Okay, you have to.

You have to. To think you're going to learn piano without practicing is, you know, it's something that 5th graders do. You know, they try to convince their mom that they don't have to go to piano lessons and they'll still be okay.

It doesn't, it's a, it's a, it's a child's way of thinking, you know. It's impossible. So anyway, we'll do an emptiness meditation.

We'll do a Mahamudra meditation. So, get settled. I'll go through all the preliminaries.

We'll go through about 45 minutes now of a meditation. So, put away your books. Get totally settled in your normal meditation posture.

Group meditations are a little delicate, okay? Try not to cough, sneeze, snort, okay? Try not to move.

If you've got to stick your legs out, do it now. Okay? If you want to bunch your legs up, do it now.

It'll be about 45 minutes. So, if you're not used to sitting, then, you know, spread out, put your legs up some. It doesn't matter.

But once you take your position, just out of respect for the other people, don't move, okay? If you have to sneeze, you know, hold it really hard and see if you can make it a splurt instead of an explosion, okay? And then forget everything else for 45 minutes, okay?

First step is to watch your breath, okay? Put your mind at the opening of your nose. Watch your breath.

I personally find it very useful to listen, try to get to the point where I can hear the blood in my ears or the air hitting my eardrums, and that automatically takes your breath down to where you want it, okay? Next step is to take refuge, and take refuge in whatever understanding of emptiness you have now. The texts all say, take refuge in, think of one thing you know about emptiness now and take refuge in it.

Secondly, think about bodhicitta, and it's good at this point to try to think of someone who's actually having a problem, like depression or anxiety or a bad physical problem, and think about them, something specific. Third step is to invite your rude lama, or if you don't have a rude lama, then some other holy being to come and meditate before you. Try to picture their face clearly.

Next step is to bow down to them mentally, so think of some holy quality they have, something you can recognize now, and mentally bow to it. Then thirdly, in your mind, make them offerings, something really beautiful, like the classic offering is Samantabhadra's offering cloud, is to fill the whole sky with flowers, flowers, roses, sweet-smelling roses, lotuses, any kind of flowers you like. Maya has some nice roses.

And more advanced form of offering is to offer them something about your practice, something that you've been doing right, or something that you will do right today. The next step is to think of some kind of negative thing you've done, or thought, or said to someone in the last day or two, and purify your mind of it by just play it back clearly in your mind like a video tape recorder, you know, play it back very clearly over and over again, look at it and see how dumb it was. Then do the same for something good you did, something good you said.

Normally, Americans, I guess it's our cultural or religious background, but we're not very good at admitting what we're doing good and right. So rejoice in something you're doing, clearly picture something you've done well, some progress you've made, even something specific like something you did for someone, or something kind you said to someone, or some improvement in your thoughts in the last few days, and play it back a few times and enjoy it. Next preliminary is to ask for teachings.

Ask in your mind for the great lamas to teach us, like if you're going to be here for the Vajrasattva retreat, then think about that and request it in a good way, respectful way in your mind. And then also ask for those moment-to-moment teachings that we get from the people around us, especially the people who irritate us. And lastly, ask the great lamas to stay in this world, and your friends who, good friends, good Dharma friends, that when you're around them, you kind of sense that they're practicing well, and they sort of challenge you to practice better.

That's the end of the preliminaries. It's really important to do them before you meditate, always before you meditate. This is also a good place to shift if you have to move around, okay?

So it's like a 30-second chance to move your legs. Blow your nose if you have to. After this point, if your nose starts running, just forget it, just let it run.

Seriously, put a towel in your lap or something. If you get an itch, just ignore it. They're very cool, they kind of peek out and then they just fade away if you don't scratch them.

Okay, go back to your breath. We'll do about three rounds of ten. Now try to visualize or think about your favorite physical object, the thing that you own that you like the most.

You know, for me it's my laptop, okay? But try to imagine, go through your life, see what automatically and comfortably comes to your mind as your favorite thing that you own. Maybe it's a piece of clothing, maybe it's a piece of jewelry, maybe it's a car.

Something that you own, a physical object that you enjoy the most. Now go to the second mode, you know? Look at that object and examine your feelings about it, that filter of those rose-colored glasses you have, your worldview about it, that you think it has some kind of lasting quality, that it's going to last for a while.

The judge or the... how to judge whether or not you're thinking about it correctly is how disappointing would you be if you lost it or it was broken or if it was stolen by someone, okay? How strongly do you feel that that's going to last?

Now try to concentrate on the same object but cancel the self-existent object. In this case it would be... try to see it as something which is not going to last and which has no permanence.

Something which is passing through your life rather quickly and changing constantly as it goes and will very quickly, very soon be out of your life. And try to look at it that way and try to see it that way. Strip away your natural feeling that it's going to last for a while.

Now we'll go to the second meditation, the second flavor of emptiness. And again, focus on that favorite object that you own and don't think anything about it, just focus on it. Now try to get in touch or get in tune with your feelings that you own it and what that implies, that you have control over it, you decide where it goes, no one else can come and move it or take it or do anything to it, it's yours.

Try to focus on your feeling of what it means for it to be yours and how you look at it that way, that's your worldview about that object, that's the color of the glasses you have on when you look at that object. Maybe it's a different color than the first color, right? I own this thing, which means I control where it goes and what happens to it.

Now try to strip away that way of thinking, see how wrong it is. That's gākjā. Gākjā means self-existent object, non-existent, never did exist, never will exist.

You don't own that thing, you cannot control its destiny any more than anyone else can. And try to look at that object in a new way and cancel that old thought about it. And then try to see it as something which is where it goes, what happens to it, it's under the control of other factors, not you really.

And that's a meditation you can do. You should... by the end of this weekend you'll have a whole Mahamudra meditation in your repertoire and you can pull it out whenever you want.

And you should have a lot of other meditations in your toolbox, like death meditation, or lamrim meditation, or tonglen meditation, or something like guru yoga meditation, okay? Now ask that lama to come to the top of your head. They should get smaller because they'd be too heavy, okay?

So they get like three inches high. And as they come up to the top of your head, they turn around so that they're facing the same way you are. And you ask them to come down into your heart and they follow a very straight, like an elevator shaft, down.

Don't picture it at your throat, okay? Picture it behind your throat, more towards your backbone, about a little bit less than half an inch in front of your backbone. And they're coming down like a small shaft there.

They get smaller and smaller like they could fit into a pea. And they come down, slowly, and try to feel it as if it's actually happening. And then, when they get to the level of your heart, then stop them there.

This is this meditation trick where they're staying in a little capsule like a pea, the size of a pea. But when you put your mind inside the pea, it looks like a huge, beautiful room, full golden light, huge lotus flower, beautiful cushion on top of the lotus flower made of white light, and then that lama sitting on that. But when you take your mind out again, it's only the size of a pea.

Then you dedicate the good karma, which is the last of the preliminaries, and you think about some light, golden light coming out of the lama's heart, and then it's coming out of your heart. And then I like to think of it spreading to all the people in SoCal, Santa Cruz. If you're strong enough, send some up to San Francisco.

And every person it touches, it helps them. Whatever problem they're having today, it helps them. Normally we do a dedication verse at the end, okay?

Then we'll take a small break, like a 5-10 minute break, okay? Namo Buddhaya.

[Speaker 2]
By the goodness of what I have just done, may all the good things we collect today arise from your wisdom.

[Speaker 1]
May all the good things we collect today arise from your wisdom. Okay, take a break.

[Speaker 2]
Session 2 continues on the next CD.