ACI 12 «Руководство к образу жизни бодхисаттвы, часть III», занятие 7

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ACI Course 12: Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life, Part Three
Class Seven: Examining the Emptiness of Your Feelings
11/6/97
transcribed by: Maria DeVita



(prayer: short mandala]
How unnatural it is when you are talking about emptiness. For example, I
always talk about the emptiness of the boss, and when you think about the boss
coming in and screaming at you and the example I always give is if the boss is
from his own sides a nasty man then the person next to you when the boss is
screaming at you who doesn’t like you would find him bad but they don’t they
like him. Okay (laugh) they think it’s great that he’s screaming at you. And
then you think it’s bad the boss is not self existencely good or bad mean or nice
it depends on who’s looking right. Then sooner or later an intelligent person
has to say what about the b oss himself is he self existent or not I understand
how two people in a room see the boss is not self existent but that could be
driven by their karma. . I want to know I want to go back one step to the boss
himself. I didn’t have the karma to see the boss even be screaming would the
boss even be screaming would the boss even exist and the answer is no, okay
the boss is also created by your karma. Whats that got to do with me? Om. This
is the step you take from thinking about the emptiness of me and thinking about
the emptiness of my parts okay. I understand that how people feel about me is
a projection and it depends on their karma then my own experience of me
whether i feel depressed or not low self-esteem or not, etc.is also my projection,
I understand all that. So, but what about my very existence, what about the fact
that I was born into this world what about the fact have a body, what about the
fact that I am having a mind right now, are those self existent. And to find that
out we are going into the parts of the person and we discussed already the parts
of the body. We got the body down to atomic particles and then we figured out
that even an atomic particle it’s a projection made upon the two sides of the
atomic particle. There are always sides to a particle no matter how small you get
there’s always a right side and a left side. Because, if the right side ever touched
the left side there wouldn’t be any atomic particle, okay. This is a famous proof
in (unclear) there are four directions east, south, north , west, and there is up and
down six directions in Buddhism . If atomic particles were so small that they have
no diameter at all east would meet west then two sides would actually be
contiguous and there wouldn’t be any (unclear) It’s im possible that you ever
reach a point in an atomic particle where you can’t divide it into two and as long
as you can divide it into two it has parts and those parts are not the atomic
particle . Okay, any more than the parts of the pen are the pen they’re not the
pen, because we practiced that we looked at the colors and shapes of the pen
and you saw that those were not the pen until you thought of them as a pen on
an atomic level there are no atoms and yours world and the chair you are sitting
on is not made of atoms. Not made in physical matter the way you always
thought of it because it can’t be made of atoms
 because the pen is not made of its colors and shapes alone. Okay. It can’t be
made of that it’s not made of that science is wrong okay. Science is wrong, they
do not exist an objective reality called atom . So what’s the point of saying that
you’re just trying to get everybody to go home and feel kind of it’s like a diet
plan you feel lighter than you did before. You don’t exist or anything there’s no
more atoms what’s the point of talking about all this. If you realize that things
are a projection of your mind then you can change If things were atoms you
could not change them were going to talk about that tonight, okay. You could
not end the suffering in the world if everything was atoms its only because there
not atoms that you can change the suffering in the world. At this point having
finished the emptiness of the body, (unclear) moves on to a very important part
of the human being . We divided the human being last week into mind and
body we discussed the emptiness of the mind the emptiness of the present
moment. The unreality of the present moment, okay, the present moment
except for your projections. You are not the sum of all the present moments of
your life until you think of yourself that way forced on you because of your
past karma. You are not the sum of your parts until you think of them that way,
okay your body is (unclear) with your mind. Now we go a little bit deeper
alright, we go to the five heaps the five (unclear) uh you heard the word heap
okay. In sanskirt (unclear) it’s kinda like I remember the first time it was very
confusing I didn’t know what they were talking about I have kind of a big
tummy but it’s not a heap you know. And I don’t see how my mind can be a
heap and I didn’t know the five heaps sunda does mean heap in Tibetan the
word is pumba. It’s hard to get a good teaching on the five heaps, people have
mistranslated them for years. They’ve been misunderstood for decades in the
west, okay. If you ever were able to get a ( unclear) that’s the first thing the guy
would cover would be the five heaps alright.
And that’s pmpa. It’s interesting in the first chapters of the (unclear) darma I was
very happy when I found that (unclear) it’s in the first chapter. They are called
heaps because they are piles of different things. Pum means to pile up things like
when you are raking leaves in Tibet you say pumpalay make them into a pile. A
heap of leaves pumbo its not a bad translation the translations okay. It’s only
though a very simple word for the parts of a person okay think of it as the parts
of a person.
I think sometimes it’s even appropriate to translate it that way. It just means the
five part’s of a person okay . Why do you call them heaps? Because each one of
those parts has a lot of other parts and that’s all, okay and that’s the only reason
(Unclear) That’s all you have five parts and each one has a lot of stuff to it and
that’s why its called . If you could understand the emptiness of each of your five
parts or of your five heaps then you would automatically understand the
emptiness of you. The day you see the emptiness directly you are on your way
 out you won’t suffer again within seven lifetimes you will become a Buddha. So
it’s very important to understand the emptiness of each one of your parts. We
did body and mind that was kind of easy we are going to go deeper okay. We’re
gonna go we got two parts of you how about five parts of you alright. What are
the five parts of you? First one is your body which is called souk, in terms of the
five heaps souk means body. The physical part of you the physical parts of you
are called souky pumbo the heaps of physical matter. Sometimes souk refers to
only to what you can see but not when you’re talking about the five heaps okay.
Towwha repeat Towwha means your capacity to feel things your ability to feel
things how many divisions in scripture they say three or five. Three would be
feeling good feeling bad and feeling in-between. Five would be physical
pleasure, mental happiness, feeling in-between, mental unhappiness, and
physical pain okay. You can divide into three , you can divide it into five. You
can divide feeling those two ways, okay. According to the Buddhism the
(unclear)) darma system feeling never stops, feeling never stops when you’re
asleep when you’re unconscious (unclear)                           Feeling never stops
feeling never stops when you’re asleep and you just died and you’re in your
(unclear) feeling never stops you’re always feeling something. Feeling is a
mental function it will never stop it cannot be stopped for eternity you will feel.
Buddhist also have (unclear) Buddhist also have five heaps they just happen to be
pure, okay. Say Dushay (student) dusha this poor word has been much abused
by translators you know and                         Dusha just means your ability to
discriminate this is good this is bad this is tall , this is short he’s my friend, he’s
my enemy, I like this I don’t like that it makes discriminations it makes
distinctions dushay. I forget which one (unclear)
I am going to skip number four for a second and go to number five . Say
numsay, numsay, numshay is just the fact that you are aware at all. It’s a weird
thing you get up in the morning and you’re aware, it’s consciousness itself.
(Unclear) you are conscious of color, shapes, you are conscious of sounds, of
smells conscious , If taste tangible objects and you are conscious of your
thoughts of your mind six general kinds of consciousness okay. It’s general
awareness it never stops, MikeTyson can knock you out you are still conscious
on some level you can still have a ringing in the ears and some kind of blissful
feeling.. (Laugh) It never stops according to Buddhism it has exited with no
beginning and it will exist with
 no end. That consciousness will go into the Buddha when you become a Buddha
you will still have consciousness, except it will be a pure consciousness. What is
number four (unclear) got called a lot of weird names its called duoshay comsta
Duoshay is a synomon for cause anything that causing something else anything
that makes something happen in general okay, is called a doochay. How is
doochay defined in the (abby unclear) culture. Very, very profound. Doochay
chelah unclear unclear) I’ll call them factors okay, other factors. Factor because it
does something that’s all other factors. The definition in the (abby unclear)
doochay is all the other stuff. (Laugh). After you got those four the other four
one two three and five anything about (unclear) is doochary (unclear) defined
like that anything else about you is I think they should have called it grab bag
(unclear) you know what I mean. It means all that other stuff about you that
wasn’t covered in the other four , and that’s how it’s defined okay, it’s just the
other stuff. The other stuff that makes up a person now what’s in the other stuff
according to the Abby Dogma and other systems are similar you have a main
mind which is your consciousness okay just the fact that you’re alive, aware, is
number five. But you have forty six distinct mental functions going on the
capacity to feel things, the capacity to make discriminations, the capacity to
concentrate on an object, the capacity to move your mind to another object and
like that. There is a whole bunch of other, the capacity of will, okay, even
amebas have these things in their mind according to Abby Dodby System and
(unclear) system you have main mind which is number five and then you have a
whole bunch of separate functions in separate parts of your mind okay, called
mental functions. In the Abby Dogma system, there are forty six of them forty
six mental functions. Forty four of them belong in other factors so what is in the
other factors? For example faith is one, jealousy is one, anger is one. Okay
different mental functions, forty four of the mental functions are in grab bag
number four out of the forty six, forty four got thrown into number four. What
else is in number four? The idea of (unclear) because that also is a part of (tessy)
the concept (tessy) (tessy) is number four because that’s part of (unclear) and
things like that her impermanence is there. Concepts are in number four. Why
am I getting into this? If you are a normal thinking person in this class, I would
start wondering how come forty four of the mental factors made it into number
four. Where did the other two go okay. Supposedly the five heaps cover every
 piece of you every part of you from your eyebrow to the irritation you had
yesterday is included into the five heaps where did those other two mental
functions go? Someone asked this question in India twenty five years ago it
was really cool and here’s the answer alright. (Silence)
This is a verse from the Abby Dogna and I’d like you to memorize it and write it
down. Say kor go mani, kor go mani what does that mean anybody remember.
You don’t have to (unclear) it just write it. (Laugh). That’s a Tibetan saying
when someone says (laugh). Say (soopay sowwa unclear) okay. We asked the
question just to remind you what happened to the other two mental functions?
There are forty six in the Abby dogma system by the way, other systems have
more okay, slightly more. . What happened to the other two, they are here in
here. Okay. And the big question is its been asked throughout the century why
did the Buddha why did the Lord Buddha take the trouble to give these two
 mental functions the big status of being their own heap all by themselves.
Forty six mental functions two of them get singled out at being extraordinary
they get to be there own heap. If you think about it there would have been
three heaps main mind, mental functions and your body. For some reason the
Buddha thought it was important that two of them should get this special status
being heaps all by themselves and he taught throughout his life about the five
parts of a person he didn’t say so much body and mind he said five parts of a
person why did he make such a big deal about feeling and discrimination why
did he give them such a big status. He could of spent his life talking about
The way we do but he wanted to talk about five heaps. He wanted those two to
be special why? This is the answer by Bassar Bundue sixteen centuries ago.
Soopay means this is soopay okay. Soopay means debating or fighting or
dispute, dispute okay even in the monastery now that’s called soopay. Okay,
disputation also means fighting, hassling, struggling against each other, soopay.
Sour means the root , the root
sour means the root , gura means here because they are the root of all fighting in
the world okay. These two get to be their own heap, these two get singled out
because they are the root of all trouble in the world. All the struggle between
human beings in the world, because feeling says I like this I don’t like that. This
makes me feel good that makes me feel bad okay. And then you struggle to get
the things that make you feel good and you struggle to get away from the
things that make you feel bad, even if it hurts other people. And that’s the root
of all struggle in the world all the wars fought in the world boil down to
somebody wanting to feel good and not to feel bad. Every war every suffering
between two people, every divorce you know boiled down to I want what
makes me feel good and I don’t want what makes me feel bad. And if it means I
have to do something
to you I will. So that’s the root of all suffering the root of all conflict is feeling
and discrimination. Discrimination in what way? Master Dumma Londou and
the First Dalai Lama in his commentary they quote a lot of sutras that say
discrimination in the sense of this is my religion, this is their religion for spiritual
people. For farmers this is my field, this is my boundaries this is my wall my
fence, that’s his field this is my field, that’s his wife, that’s my wife, that’s his kids,
these are my kids, that’s his house this is my house, that’s his car, my car. His
and mine, There’s and mine okay. It all comes from dooshay that other heap
okay. The capacity the habit of making distinctions this is mine, this is yours I will
fight for what’s mine fight for your country, you know. Be patriotic Do the
Russians love their children or not? You know (laugh). Their Russian you know
it’s a separate thing (laugh). By the way, some people have thought that
Buddhism somehow gets you to a point were everything melts together. There
is no me no my everything is non duality, you know. Buddhist are one big
happy us you know that’s not true. I almost used a bad word but I didn’t. Of
course, Buddhist still make the distinction between you and me you are a
suffering (unclear) being, I am an enlightened being . I am trying to help you it’s
not like they melt into each other people who are enlightened continue to have
their individual mind (unclear) and their individual identity. Why? Because you
cannot collect karma from me and your identity consists of your karma ripening.
You are your karma ripening I cannot collect karma from you and you cannot
collect karma from me . We will forever be separate spaghetti strands stretched
over eternity its not true and Buddhism never said as Time Magazine said you
become one with the cosmos you know. You will always be separate from other
people in that sense you will be a separate individual even after you reach
Buddhahood. So there are so many Buddhas and they’ll be one Buddha for
every (Unclear) that now exists there will be one Buddha. Okay, eventually. So
its not true that you melt into other people Buddhist have discrimination,
Buddhist still have feeling, you know. They happen to be feeling blissful all the
time totally blissful all the time okay. But is it true that they go into some heroin
drug stupor or something and don’t feel anything its not true. Is it true that the
goal of Buddhism is you shouldn’t feel good or bad about anything not at all you
know. Find me this person I’ve been waiting you know I have a dental drill
waiting for them (laugh) you know its not true, its not true. Of course (senyi
munk fochue)
in the lowest school of Buddhism every school of Buddhism says you will have
feeling for eternity, for eternity you will have feeling, And when you reach
Buddhahood it will be a blissful feeling. Its not like you’re trying to wipe out
your discrimination, its not like your trying to wipe out your feeling.              Your
trying to
change them from impure to pure and we will talk about that later. We will talk
about that later okay. So anyway the first reason that those two mental
functions out of forty six in the abbey daprpa system got that status of being a
whole separate heap is that they are the basis of all fighting in the world all the
struggle comes from that me and you, and I feel good from this and I feel bad
from this.
Say korway deecha, kowary deecha, (students) kowary deecha when you start
fighting you collect bad karma okay (laugh), which sets the scene for your future
suffering. Okay. And in that sense these two mental functions should get their
own status because they are (unclear) they are the cause of this suffering world.
They are the cause of the suffering world that you live in okay, because they
drive you to hurt other people and collect bad karma. They drive you they
instigate you to collect bad karma its because you want to feel good that you do
something improper its because you don’t want to feel bad that you hurt
somebody else, to get away from them or get them out of your life or
something that you yell at them, you ignore them, you hurt them okay. Its
because of the distinction between me and mine I want to be happy I don’t care
if you’re happy this is my thing its not your toy this is my toy okay. This is not
only the cause of all struggle in our current world, it the cause of all the future
suffering world that you will ever live in the continuation of this suffering life
depends on those two mental functions okay. So if you think about it number
one here which is the cause of all the hassles is in the present tense corri koe
means future tense you are setting yourself up for more suffering and these two
are the culprit these two are the villain. In their impure form (unclear) in their
impure form obviously the feeling that the Buddha has and the discriminations
that a Buddha makes are not causing future suffering okay. Number three say
engo jhen, (student) engo jhen, Master
(unclear) points out that the five heaps are in order of subtlety. The least subtle
heap is the first one the most subtle heap is the last one and that’s another reason
why you might want to take these two mental functions out and treat them
separately and I’ll explain more about that. You think about the five heaps
what’s the first one the physical body and there is nothing about you that which
is more unsubtle or gross like compared to your thoughts, compared to your
reflection, or compared to your meditation the body is very obvious and gross,
okay. Not subtle at all. What is the next most subtle thing about you, its heap
number two. What is heap number two? Your feelings why because so much of
your feelings depend on the body my hand feels bad, my head feels bad, its not
your head or your hand its your feelings but because it is so linked to your
hands and so linked to your hand you relate to them that way because they
almost mix something physical because they are so closely related to your
physical body just a little more subtle than the physical body. How about
discriminations, discriminations are very gross it takes like almost a very strong
decision to say this is his, this is mine, that’s a very gross distinction that’s not like
a very subtle state of consciousness its almost like a big stupid bowl in a china
shop state of mind Not very subtle at all this is mine this is his, this is good, this is
bad, this is big, this is tall he’s my friend, he’s not my friend okay. It doesn’t
take like a genius to make those distinctions okay, so that’s number three. It’s
the grossest kind of mental function of that type. All the other mental functions
are a little more subtle but they are still saying things like I want to be good like
willpower you know. I wish that this would happen I am about to turn my
attention to something I’m going to think hard about that you see those are all
mental functions so they become number four because they are even more
subtle then that big (unclear) discriminate. Okay. And then number five is so
subtle that when I speak about it I am not sure that you are even recognizing it
in yourself, I am not sure that you are even identifying in yourself. It is your
awareness you’ve had your awareness your whole life so you are not even
aware of your awareness, you see what I mean. It’s hard to think about your
awareness. It’s just the fact that you are alive it’s the fact that where did it come
from its kind of amazing you know why is a bunch of meat being aware, see
what I mean. Its very subtle thinking about your mind is very difficult being
aware of your awareness is very difficult. Isolating your consciousness and
looking at it is a little difficult its their all the time you take it for granted that this
hunk of meat called Michael Roach’s body should have this awareness, okay
because you never not had it. Yeah, (student unclear) its like the weakest fact
okay, the first two are one hundred times more important. I’m just trying to
cover the verse for you okay I would of left them out but it would have ruined
the meter okay,           Also I’m not allowed to leave things out okay. (Laugh)
Apparently some omission being found is important, okay. Say semcheu,
(students) semchen means mental function how many in the Abbey Dama
system forty six sem means all the mental functions, lay means all, all, all the
mental functions lay means all here in this case. Out of all the mental functions
that there are forty six different states of mind soorla which means feeling,
feeling, okay. Dum means and doochay means discrimination, the ability to
discriminate between things. Each number two and three right. Lockshe means
they were isolated , picked out they were isolated okay. As what as poombos, as
heaps, okay. Poombos means they got picked out what do they call that in
English when you single out lockshe is singled out, okay. (Unclear) They were
singled out to be poombo, to be their own heap lockshe means he did that who
Lord Buddha. Now Ill translate it for you very small (unclear) means because
they are the basis of the order of the five heaps in this case que means (unclear) .
So I’ll give it to you Tibetan syntax is pretty much backward From English
syntax, we’ll start at the back. The Buddha isolated out, singled out lets use
singled out, you hate it when I      . The Buddha singled out, out of all the mental
functions, feeling and discrimination to be their own heap for three reasons
okay. That is not stated here but that is understood okay. Number one they are
the root of all conflict in the world. Number two they are the cause for all your
future suffering in life. (Unclear) I don’t know which life you’re on. And three
they help explain the order of the five heaps they how do you say, they relate to
the order of the five heaps and that’s not very important you know that
subtlety, that subtlety idea (unclear) means reason number three is they relate to
the order of the five heaps, okay they are important to take out and treat single
out, because when you explain the heaps you can go in increasing subtlety, that’s
all. Why did we even get into this? What I am trying to point out, I threw in this
(unclear) stuff, okay. Why? What I’m trying to point out is that master Sharpe
Daba moves on from the body and mind directly to feelings when he discusses
the emptiness that is his next section of the ninth chapter he felt that feelings
were so important he wanted you to understand their emptiness especially,
okay. To the idea of the emptiness of your feelings its very very important. If
you are really going to get enlightened, if you really are going to stop suffering
in this life, you have to understand the emptiness of your feelings. You must
begin to understand the emptiness of your feelings. What feelings? How you
feel when the boss comes in and starts screaming at you, okay. How you feel
about anything in the world that you don’t like I mean I like the emptiness of my
feelings because this gives me immediate ammunition to achieve happiness in
my life.      If you can understand the emptiness of your feelings you can
immediately start be happier, and that’s the whole reason I am in this room. I
mean I have this theory that everyone gets up to be happy in the morning, so
people are worst at it than others, okay. Depends on what (unclear) you have,
must of us are burdened with this albatross called western world view, which
doesn’t work. Anyway, everyone gets up and tries right. They go home and
sleep in more suffering than when they woke up, everyone’s trying to be happy,
you know. You are seeking to feel good, I mean that’s the goal. Buddhism by
the way doesn’t say you have to you know, the goal of Buddhism is to be some
stoic vegetable. You know, you just sit there you don’t feel good or bad, that’s
okay that’s the goal of Buddhism. Don’t assume you can’t do anything about it.
The goal of Buddhism is not to sit there and put up with the crap of the world it’s
to remove the crap of the world. the goal of Buddhism is not to sit in the corner
and not feel anything or to be happy when crap happens. It’s not true that is not
the goal of Buddhism, at all. Buddha’s are not sitting in their Buddha paradises
because they’ve learned to put up with crap in an ultimate way it’s not the goal
of Buddhism, no, I mean, people think that. People think you’re suppose to sit
there and not feel anything and that’s the goal of Buddhism, it’s not that. Of
course you want to feel good. Who feels best in the universe? Buddha, okay
(student unclear). Uh we’re going to talk about it, we’re going to talk about the
difference. We’re going to rip feeling apart, if we get time. (Student unclear) all
of them are (unclear) (laugh) unclear, seriously.        That’s a good question
everything the basis of all of them (unclear) they would all be there it would be
in each of them. Later in the break, in the break come up to me in the break.
Okay, so feeling is you have to, for me if Buddhism can change anything
immediately okay, I understand you’re saying I can change my (unclear). I
understand you saying I can change my old age, and my sickness but, in an
immediate sense can understanding emptiness change my level of happiness in
this life, because frankly that’s the most immediate goal for all of us, you know.
I can talk about death not more than a few people in this room believe they are
going to die today. You’re not worried about it that much, you have this vague
uncertainty and apprehension about it anxiety, but nobody in this room is
definitely sure they are going to die tonight unless you’ve made some plans that
I don’t know about. Um, but anyway feeling if I say here’s the thing that if you
understand the emptiness of this thing tonight you can immediately start to have
more happiness tomorrow. That would get your ears up, like okay what that’s
the emptiness of your feelings, really you want to be happy. You know that’s
really what you want that’s why people get of bed, and that’s why very
seriously depressed people don’t get out of bed they just gave up you know.
You literally move out of bed in the morning because you seek some kind of
happiness, you want to feel good today. You want to feel good today that’s why
you put your legs down on the floor , the feet on the floor that’s why you move
from under the covers however, slowly it goes, that’s why you get up. (Laugh)
and that’s why you move, that’s why you get in a car, that’s why you get in a
subway, that’s why you go to work. Why you do anything, you want to feel
happy, you want some kind of happiness, okay. So, we have to discuss the
emptiness of your happiness, the emptiness of your feelings, okay. Uh, this
exercise has a name (unclear) empty examinations, we examine the pen, we
examine you, we examine your body, we examine your mind. Now we are
going to examine feelings, but this method that I am on to tonight is called
timba, say timba nearshoc she, timba nearshoc she. Timba means to remember,
near means close, shoc means to (unclear) she means for. I will give you the
translation I consider to be a lousy translation, so don’t write it down okay,
(laugh). These have been called the four close recollections
you know, when was the last time you saw close recollection in The New York
Times. I don’t like to use words that don’t have any meaning to me, It means
close but close in sanskit means deep, deep okay. Deep awareness, okay
(unclear) the four types of deep awareness. A deep awareness you’ll see why
okay. It’s a deep awareness of four things. What are the four? Nu, say nu,
(students) deep awareness of your body. Okay, deep awareness of your body,
what is deep awareness? Does it mean when your stomach growls, you’re like
really aware there something, we’ll talk about it alright, we’ll talk about what
deep awareness means. The second one (unclear) soewa, soewa (students) your
feelings right, that’s what we’ve been talking about all night heap number two
(unclear) your feelings, okay. By the way, in this case and I’ll get into it more,
awareness means the understanding of the emptiness of something, okay. It’s
an understanding of the emptiness of something. It’s an awareness of your
body in the sense of understanding its emptiness more and examining its
emptiness, okay. And the same with feelings, okay. What’s the third one? By
the way, to me the second one is by far the most important where I collect my
bad (unclear) is in the realm of do I feel good about this person or not. Am I
happy with this situation or not, to me to understand your feelings deeply would
be an important goal and also its my feelings I want to straighten out. I want to
feel good, I want to be happy. Third one say sem, sem, (students) sem means
mind, okay. Deep awareness of your mind means coming to an understanding
of the emptiness of your mind, alright. Coming to an understanding of the
emptiness of your mind being able to examine your mind to see if it really is
empty or not. We’re going to go through these four exercises alright. Maybe
you get home, maybe you don’t, okay. Chaur, chaur, (students) chaur as you
know means darma and one of the meanings of darman which has nine or ten
distinct meanings is think, stop other things. So anything that is not included in
the first three meditations or the first three awareness’, first three analysis we’ll
call the analysis of think. The deep awareness of objects, okay, deep awareness
of objects. I’ll start to go through these four exercises with you in the ninth
chapter by the end of tonight we would only have finished the first three, okay.
And in the next class we’ll pick up on number four. The goal of tonight is to get
through the first three, alright. If you’re going to examine your body and
examine its emptiness, here are the steps you’ll take. By the way, here’s the
thing spelled out, you don’t have to write this you already have it, you already
have it, Body (unclear) is the same, it’s a close examination of the body. I don’t
mind if you put on your homework the four then just say single words under
them. That’s okay, it’s a formula right the deep awareness of your body, the
deep awareness of your feelings, the deep awareness of your mind, the deep
awareness of everything else, okay. What is involved in examining your body
to see if its empty or not, we actually did it last week I mean last class was jue
mayee we finished that. What did we do? I’m going to go over it with you. By
the way this is...GI Jane or not (student unclear) you ask for it. Your right
seventy percent done, okay so bust ass for a few more classes. This is where a
lot of people stop doing their quizzes and stuff like that, you know, you’re going
to be whining for two months because there are not going to be any classes
wishing you had done more stuff. You’ll be sitting at home and not having
anything to read because you didn’t do it just work hard, forget sleeping for a
few..., we have like one more week okay. Don’t be whimsy, you go to work
eight hours, ten hours, you work fifty, sixty, seventy hours a week come on you
can give these three hours, alright. Say chai chen, weedon yamma manypa opa,
Chai chen menas the sum of the whole as opposed to the part. Chaichen means
the whole as opposed to the parts the sum total you can say. Weedon Means the
thing that has the parts as part of the whole.
When you are examining the emptiness of the body, what do you guess the
whole is, your body. Duh..okay, that’s a trick question. Chai chen means body,
chunden chaishay means the parts, chaishay means the parts what are the parts.
Your arms, legs, head, torso, etc. in Tibetan they are called the enlog, in this case
I would translate is as components sometimes it means limbs, okay. But it’s too
many here its including your hairs, the eyebrow and every wrinkle on your face,
and the stuff on your teeth and its too much to call limbs I think. Because limbs
in English means yours arms and legs, so I don’t want to use that word. Rumsa
natur means it does not have any nature of its own they do not have any nature
of their own. Who don’t have any nature of their own, the whole and the parts.
Who’s the whole my body, who’s the parts...my fingers, my hands, my head.
Don’t they have any nature of their own? Sure they do my head has a nature of
being a head, my fingers have a nature of being a finger. Nature here must
mean some special kind of nature that they don’t have what’s that. Their own
side they don’t have any nature from their own side. If I didn’t have the karma
to see them as a head, I wouldn’t see them as a head. I would see them as a vast
plane a gigantic redwood tree through which I the flea must caught in order to
eat the dandruff on Michael Roach’s head, alright. If it were self-existently a head
he wouldn’t be in that forest looking for food, okay. Of course, it’s not self-
existently a head, it has no nature of being a head, okay from its own side. It’s
has the nature of being a head for Michael Roach because I’m forced to see it that
way. The flea, or you know those big things you see in the pictures they look
like monsters that are eating the dandruff in your hair all the time I have a lot
them. To them, obviously it’s not a head, a vast field of good food with an
occasional treat, alright. And that’s the emptiness of my head, okay. Of course,
my head does not have any nature of its own. Mipla deta lapa means you
decide, it you establish it, you figure it out, okay. Stuff in what we call the deep
awareness of your body. I mean if you went around realizing that your head
was only your projection, that would change things, why? I would rather
project Manjoosho head, I would rather it be golden with this thick black hair
alright, with gold and everything and eternally blissful, you know. That’s what’s
the importance of the deep awareness of my body. I have to understand the
emptiness of my head because I want to get to a Buddhist body I must
understand the emptiness of my head and that’s called the exercise of
establishing the emptiness of my head and other parts is called the deep
awareness of my body, and we did that already. Did the atoms have any nature
of their own? No. Do atoms make up the world, no. Does science work, for
human beings happiness not at all. You make new machines to create the same
old suffering, you know. In cave man days they were hitting each other with
rocks, and now they got these really sophisticated atom bombs. Same thing,
same story, exactly the same story it hasn’t moved an inch toward more
happiness, you know. You can have a car, you can have a subway, you can
have a 586 or 486 a pentium plus computer but it doesn’t make you happier.
Not necesarily happier but in the hands of a Buddha, of course. But from their
own side its not a solution and it doesn’t make people happier, people are not
happier than they were fifty years ago, okay. They’re probably not much more
unhappier either, don’t get into that romantic thing that everything was happier
in (unclear) days, okay. You know, there teeth were rotting out they were
fighting each other, they were hitting each other with hatchets. You dig up
arrowheads what do you think they did with them. (Laugh) okay, that was a
popular thing when i was in college, if things could get back to the forrest it
would be alright, okay. That was the first (unclear)          To this meditation and
here is the second one . Say dayla moo (unclear) dayla means therefore,
therefore what because your body doesn’t have any nature of its own, and
because its parts don’t have any nature of their own. The loo the body, your
body meala is a sweet word, lam is to dream meelan is the Tibetan word for
dream its like a dream way it’s the Tibetan word for dream. We used to drive
down to Washington once a month and we use to go to Hojo, and he’d say is
this real milk or melam, like there was this thing called dairy dream like (laugh)
you always remember where you learned certain words. Meelan tabo means
like a dream, okay. Chopa means attachment, Chopa means attachment in this
case. It can also mean to become. meripa means its wrong to do that, wrong to
do that, meripa, meripa. What does that mean to translate the whole thing
(student unclear) its wrong to feel attachment for the body, because its just like a
dream. Because of number one, okay, because of number one. What was
number one the body, and its parts have no nature of their own. Now people
go, Buddhism say everything is a dream and then people are like cool that’s
really mystical. I can do anything I want its all just a dream, you know. If I could
just see that my life is like a dream, I wouldn’t have to pay off my credit cards or
anything, you know, I would be happy. If like could become like a dream then
nothings real, you know I don’t have any problems with my wife, my credit
cards wouldn’t matter anymore you know, my rent its all a dream. That’s not
what he means obviously, okay. You try and pretend it’s a dream the collection
agency will still find you, okay. They’ll still garnish your wages and stuff like
that, you know. You can’t get out of it that way. What does dream mean here?
It means right now when the boss comes in and yells at you, or someone hits
you, your perception of your body is totally wrong. You see your body as some
kind of thing made of atoms that someone else has hit and therefore you will hit
the person back. They have damaged your body and you’re going to hit them
back. That’s an illusion. The body you are defending doesn’t exist. The body
you are defending doesn’t exist any more than that Miss America body you had
three nights ago when you had too much popcorn and fell asleep, you know
and like wow, it doesn’t exist. That body doesn’t exist, the one you think is there
is no more there than your dreams. So don’t go defending it by hurting other
people. Don’t defend a dream body, don’t beat up someone in your dreams
who throws catsup on Miss America’s dress because she’s not there.
The body you are defending doesn’t exist, because she is not there, she is not
real. The body you are defending doesn’t exist, a body they could hurt without
your projections doesn’t exist. What does that mean? If you are going to defend
this body by hurting someone, your proving that your looking at the wrong
body. Get it, I’ll say it again. If you are going to defend your body by hurting
someone else, you don’t understand what your body is. There is no such body
the body you’re defending doesn’t exist. Why? If to save or protect this body
you are hurting someone else, your crazy. Why? This body is only getting hurt
because you hurt somebody in the past, the body you are defending doesn’t
exist. Hurting someone to protect this body you don’t understand what the
body is. The body you’re trying to protect doesn’t exist, okay. . You’ve been
doing that for countless years, you’ve been protecting someone who is not
there, get it. The body you are trying to protect doesn’t exist, if you (unclear) by
hurting someone else. Think what the world would be like if everyone had this
world view. Which is true, correct, okay. You wouldn’t have anymore conflict,
there wouldn’t be anymore feelings it would be really amazing,okay. This is the
correct viewpoint, this is yonvade , if the whole world had this there wouldn’t be
any trouble, and we’d all be like (unclear) in a short time, and no other viewpoint
works, okay. It’s profound, its profound implications for society, a culture for
western civilization, okay. It’s very profound it could work if people learned it,
it would be profound. The whole behavior of western civilization would change,
okay. We’re working on it. Therefore, it’s wrong to get attached to this body
which is like Miss America in your dreams, okay. There is no such body, If you
are hurting someone to protect that body, you don’t know what your body is.
You’re looking at the wrong thing, you’re looking at something that is a dream
it has no more existence then that Miss America that was in your dream a few
nights ago, okay. Very profound once you get to it. It doesn’t mean you’re not
there Jay is not sitting in the second pew, you know, you can leave your wallet
you don’t need it. (Laugh) It doesn’t mean that okay. When I say it means the
body you protect by hurting others that one doesn’t exit it never did, okay. Last
thing and then I’ll give you some non existent cookies and stuff. *** Say day
(unclear) day means because of all the above by that or through that because of
what we just said, konsa means the person in my case Michael Roach, in your
case whoever you are, okay. It’s very personal when they said konsa think of
yourself (unclear) think of (unclear), Jay think of Jay, Anne think of Anne, okay.
Konsay the person, kong (unclear) means you don’t have any nature of your
own, you don’t have any nature of your own. Dewpa means that proves it, that
proves it, okay. Let’s translate it in normal English, steps one and two prove
that I don’t have any nature either, okay. Steps one and two prove that I don’t
have any nature either w hen he says either we started talking from the point of
view of your body. And since we proved that your body doesn’t have any
nature you don’t have any nature either. What do you mean I don’t have any
nature? Am I myself or not, of course, your yourself. Are you yourself from
your own side? No, because you could of been a vast plane covered with
occasional trees. To a different being with a different karma, okay, that’s all.
Therefore, you are not self existent, who cares. If I stand in front of a taxi will I
still get run over, go to the hospital and still get a bill, yes you will. So what is the
point of talking about all this. If you can prove that you are not self existent, if
you can prove that you are just a perception forced on you from your past
karma you can change into a Buddha. You see, if Ann Lindsey is not self
existent, Ann Lindsey can become a (unclear) angel, okay. That’s cool, that’s the
whole point. If you can prove it about your body it applies to me and then I can
become an enlightened being that’s important. Take a break there and then we
will finish.
(Silence).
We’re on to we finished the deep awareness of the body, we are going to get
into the deep awareness of your feelings. You have already written the name of
it so I am just giving it to you again. Say sorwa temba (unclear) You already
wrote that I am not going to go over that again. It’s the deep awareness of your
feelings when you have a feeling looking into the emptiness of it. By the way, I
also want to clarify one other thing is it wrong if someone attacks your body to
defend what you perceive as your body. It’s not wrong the Buddha did it, the
Buddha even forcefully stopped people from hurting his own body and other
people’s bodies. Why? To protect them from bad karma, okay. Because of
compassion for them, you must protect people who are being hurt that is the
(unclear) commitment you have it’s all over Buddhism it’s your responsibility to
be interested when people are suffering and take even drastic actions to protect
them. You are never allowed to do so with anger or hatred, it can only be done
out of compassion. You do not collect bad karma if you do it that way, so if you
see someone hurting someone, yes it’s a non self existent body and your
probably perceiving the wrong body. But it’s quite proper and necessary and
your responsibility to help that person but not with anger and not creating new
bad karma. If the person attacking them was your mother, because she was
gone temporarily crazy, you would find a way not to hurt them. There is always
a way, I mean most often there is a way. The Dalai Lama said, I heard him in
Seven Years In Tibet, when Brad Pitt said, “ If we take every worm out of this
dirt that we are digging the foundation from you will never get your movie
theater. And he said “ you’re a smart guy, you figure it out”. (Laugh) And he
did. So you can figure a way not to hurt them and stop them normally, most of
the time. Here are the steps in the meditation: On the awareness of your feeling
this is the main subject tonight. And how to get into the emptiness of your
feeling how to understand the emptiness of your feeling, okay. (Unclear) Solair
means feelings, sola means of feelings, lowel means their nature, he uses a word
that also means (unclear) okay, I think because he wanted to avoid the word
nature because he’s been struggling to get you to accept that they don’t have a
self existent nature. Lowel can also mean their essence, okay. (Unclear) you can
think of as having a nature of their own. Karpa means we deny that, we
disprove that, we refute that, okay. Now I’ll translate it for you the first step in
developing a deep awareness of your feelings is to understand that the feeling
itself does not have a nature of its own, okay. The feeling itself does not have a
nature of its own. That’s the first step, okay. He gives two examples to clarify
what he means by that first he starts talking about a feeling of pain, okay. A
feeling of pain. You can say the feeling of pain you get when your boss comes in
and screams at you that’s my favorite example. Or the feeling you get when the
dentist is drilling your teeth, okay. That pain, okay. If it had a nature of being a
pain from its own side (unclear) it could never change. You would always feel
just that bad if the pain were coming from the tooth, if the pain were coming
from your boss you would never change, you would also feel as bad the first
moment they started drilling, or the first moment he started screaming. If the
pain were coming from them, if the pain had any nature of its own, if the pains
nature were to hurt it would never change, got it. If the pains nature was to hurt
it would never change. Pain itself is a projection pain itself is a concept it’s a
conception see what I mean. Pain hurts only because your mind is making it
hurt, get it. The thing called pain hurts only because your past karma is making
you see it be hurting. That’s very difficult alright. Pain is not to hurt until your
karma forces you to see it that way. I’ll say it again. Pain doesn’t hurt from its
own side. Pain doesn’t have a nature of hurting. Until your karma forces you to
see it hurt, it’s very profound, okay. If it did have a nature of hurting from its
own side, it would always hurt you the same way you could never change it.
You could never get relief by taking Anacin, okay. Because that feeling has a
nature of pain of its own. Which is not your projection and it doesn’t depend on
your past karma. So you are stuck with it forever, that’s not the way pain is,
okay. That’s not the way pain is. You know that because pain goes away
eventually. Pain goes away that’s proof its not pain from its own side. That’s
proof that pain doesn’t have a nature of hurting from its own side, because
someone else is making it hurt, who Mr. Karma okay. Mr. Karma is making
pain hurt. Very profound, if that were not true pain would never get more or
less. It would always be the same. If pain were hurting from its own side, it
would never change. That’s Master S Davis discussion of pain, now he talks
about pleasure. He says and think about it if pleasure were coming from its own
side, if pleasure felt good, from its own side. Imagine a mother who’s only child
just died, think about a mother whose only child had just died and the grief they
are feeling the mental suffering. If pleasure existed in itself, if pleasure felt good
from its own side, they would could give them a nice cookie and they could feel
very happy. I’ll say it again. If pleasure felt good from its own side, then you
could give them a cookie and their grief would just disappear immediately.
Why? Why do I say that? Because if pleasure felt good from its own side, it
would be one hundred percent better. You see our pleasure always mixed up,
our pleasures are always like half pleasure, half pain, now pleasure, tomorrow
less pleasure, more pleasure tomorrow, less pleasure today. Our pains are
(unclear) were talking about it, you know. Every experience you have in this
life, of pain or pleasure is almost always mixed up with some other component
of another thing. You can’t get a perfect pleasure in this life. There is a joke in
Tibetan if cheerios really tasted good, then if you ate two bowls it would be twice
as good as eating one. And if you ate four bowls, it would be four times as
good, and if you ate six boxes at one sitting right it would be twenty-four times.
If it felt good from its own side but that’s now where it’s coming from. It
changes into pain around the third bowl, I know. (Laugh) Why? If Cheerios
were good from their own side, it should be true I would feel three times better
on the third bowl something else shifts. The good karma declining, the bad
karma asserting itself, like airplanes waiting in the runway. And I start to feel
bad it’s not coming from the Cheerios, their not so bad, its not like they decided
to taste different, you see. It’s not like they decided lets make his stomach hurt
now, okay. They don’t make these decisions someone else is calling the shots it’s
Mr. Karma. And that’s what you have to understand, feeling so that’s his
argument. By the way those two are you homework, okay. His argument
about pleasure that it doesn’t feel good from its own side that if a mother had
lost her only child, and felt so bad and if you had a cookie, if it tasted good from
its own side and made people happy from its own side, then it would be one
hundred percent happiness. Never missed up with sad and when you fed it to
her, her sadness would go away. And he’s giving that example because that’s
not the case, at least no mothers that I know. Alright. Here’s the second step,
by the way you can do there meditations in December and January, okay. I am
going to do a retreat and I encourage you to do a retreat. If you want to we can
talk about how to do it and stuff like that. I think it would be good if each
person who is training themselves here could do like two long term retreats a
year, that would be a goal, nice goal. (Student unclear) I’ll get to you. Say tasho
(unclear) toopa carpa , tasho means the cause of that feeling, (unclear) means it
has some nature of its own. Carpa means we deny it we prove that its not true,
carpa means we prove that its not true. So I’ll translate for you. Step number
two in the meditation called the deep awareness of your feelings, it’s too prove
that its not correct, that the causes of your feelings have any nature of their own
either. We finished the nature of the feeling itself now we’re talking about do
the causes of your feelings have any nature of their own. That is the next step in
figuring out that your feelings are coming from your past karma and not from
the people you are mad at, okay. Or the people you desire, alright. What are
the causes of an active feeling, okay? What are the causes of the act called feeling
good or feeling bad? We can talk about it in terms of strange encounters of the
third kind, strange encounter meaning three things have to come together.
There has to be an encounter between three different elements, three things
have to happen for you to have an experience of pleasure or pain. For you to
have a feeling three things normally happen, and here I am going to concentrate
on physical feeling, you know like feeling good physically, okay. A. There has
to be an object. An outside object, like a pretty picture or a really good tasting
(unclear) and strawberry protein shake like that, okay. Has to be an object, like
that, okay. (Laugh). Then there has to be a sense organ, which is the cells on the
top of my tongue, okay. According to Abbey Darba there are certain cells
sprinkled around the top of my tongue and inside my mouth that make things
tasty. Then there has to be the consciousness of the taste, there has to be an
awareness of the taste, its no good if the tongue feels it and I have been knocked
out by Mike Tyson. You can pour the shake down my mouth and I won’t be like
licking my lips okay. So there has to be the object, which is the shake, there has
to be the sense organ, which is the tongue the cells on the tongue receptive
glands whatever, Jim can tell us later. And there has to be an awareness of the
taste. When those three things convene, we call it the convening,
lepta, which is by the way step number six in the wheel of life is called contact,
meaning the convening of those three things. Step number seven in the wheel
of life is feelings then you get a feeling, then you say hmm. Good. (Laugh).
Okay. But those three things have to convene first, okay. The next step in this
mediation about the emptiness of your feelings is to see if those three things
have their own nature or not. Got it, okay. We’ll start with the shake, okay. I
am going to finish it one way or another. (Laugh) After class I never get a
chance people want to talk I have to get into the car. Um. Doesn’t it have any
nature of being delicious from its own side. No. Why not? I am sure there are
people in this room who would find this disgusting if they tasted it, okay.
(Laugh) They proves that the tastiness is not coming from its own side, very
simply, okay. Are my tastebuds coming from their own side? No. Why not? I
am going to lose them, okay. They will lose their ability to taste. If the ability to
taste where coming from their side and not dictated by other events, they would
always be there. I could keep tasting for hundreds of years. But they are not
feeling from there own side, tasting from their own side, their tasting because I
have the karma for them to taste. And as I get older they will lose their ability to
taste and then you get into heavier and heavier Starbucks coffee, more and more
cigarettes because you don’t get the same taste, you know what I mean. You
lose the ability to taste things. Why? If they had the ability to taste from their
own side they should always taste as well as the first day I had them, but they
don’t. Because that’s not where the tasting is coming from it’s coming from my
karma. And my karma is wearing out as I speak. I lost a lot of karma between
seven and nine twenty and my taste buds are less affected then they were two
hours ago, okay. It’s not like it happens every three years that you know, Mr.
Karma says lets lower the taste buds ten percent. It’s an instant by instant
process, I had lost some in the last hour, okay. The karma started to get less,
okay. So they are not self existently tasting. How about my consciousness of
the taste, that is not self existent either. That doesn’t come from its own side
either. It ‘s also my karma, why? I can’t always get a (unclear) shake when I
want one. You see what I mean. If tasting something good was coming from its
own side, its shouldn’t depend on (unclear) I can get it any time I want. I can
have it any time I want. It doesn’t depend on my karma, something like that. So
the causes for having the feeling are not coming from their own side. What’s the
point of discussing all this? I mean for me the important thing, it goes back to
the chapter on patience, how do I stay patient with things I don’t like. When
things that happen during the day, the people I meet somebody this morning
dissed me, okay. I get to be a bigger, bigger lama fewer people diss me, so
when somebody disses me it hurts more. I used to get dissed all the time, now I
get dissed some of the time. You know, so, someone dissed me this morning so
why where did that come from, I don’t like it, I really don’t like it, I don’t want it
to happen. This person anyway, (laugh) I don’t like this I don’t like this thing
that’s happening (Laugh), and you have your own, I don’t like it, I don’t like
(unclear). So, why where is it coming from I have to understand where is the
object coming from. Where is the feeling coming from, where are the eyes
coming from, where is the idea coming from. Where is being dissed coming
from, you have to think of all the causes where is the person coming from.
Where did my mind come from, where did my ability to see them diss me come
from, you know. Where did all this stuff come from, and that’s the whole point
you have to see that it came from karma. Can you stop people from dissing you
in the moment that they are dissing you? No, okay. Can you stop future ones?
Yes, it’s all in the reaction, it’s all in the reaction, you know. If I can be patient
and stop getting any at them, I can slowly choke off all these people and that’s
the whole point of Buddhist practice. Master Chame Davis said “kiss them
goodbye”. Because every moment your patient with them you just lost a few
more of them. Eventually, you won’t have to meet these people anymore, you
see people who go around New York City and they swear everybody’s nice but
you know better right. Not true, okay, they’re meeting the same people you do.
They’re having a totally different experience of New York City, why? Different
karma, why? They didn’t react in the past. You’re still reacting, as long as you
keep reacting negatively you’ll meet these people. You’ll be the person who
runs into every creepy guy in New York, and they’ll somehow tread this path
and meet every neat person in New York. Why? It’s all in the reaction, okay.
You can’t stop in the present moment meeting people who you don’t want to
meet, but if you are patient with them and you stop reacting you will stop
meeting them. This again is the only correct view, it’s the only correct way to
handle a situation in New York City, okay. It’s the only way that makes human
beings happy in the long run, the current viewpoints in Western civilization on
this question also are totally wrong, and no one will ever be happy as long as
they keep up those viewpoints. And if we change viewpoints, then slowly
everyone will begin meeting nice people. That’s called the Buddha field. Okay
a Buddha paradise, you can get there, that’s how you get there, okay. I really
would like to propose that we junk Western civilization viewpoint up to now,
okay. It’s really not such a big deal and try this one, it works. It brings the
human being what the human being seeks and the others don’t, okay. They just
don’t work, okay. So the second step in that meditation is to figure out where all
these causes are coming from, where did this person come from. Where did my
eyeball come from, where did my awareness of my eyeball come from, okay.
Why am I meeting this person right now? The basic question, why is this
happening to me right now. You have to ask yourself this, that is part of the
meditation on the emptiness of your feelings. Why, okay. Mrs. Melvin said “it
just happened”, Father Smith says either “it just happened or God was testing
you”, you know. No thanks, I asked someone the other day “Do you have to
keep meeting these people,” they said, do you want to keep getting run over by
cars, you see what i mean it’s not a test, its crappy karma, and you can stop it,
you don’t have to get tested anymore. It’s enough, we got tested forty years,
enough crap either I passed or flunked I don’t care, but I am tired of it, okay. I
don’t need to be tested anymore, I was tested enough, okay. Tay mingeu
(unclear) Tay means feelings, of feelings, feelings. Mingeu means the things
they’re focusing on, the thing that the feelings are focusing on. In the case of a
delicious bagel from Al’s Cheese Shop, it’s a good taste, see what I mean a
delicious bagel, a bagel that’s the mingeu of the feeling. If I like it it’s the bagel or
the taste of the bagel, get it, okay. Tay mingeu dropa means has its own nature,
its tasty from its own side, okay. Garpa means we refuse that we deny that, its
not true. Why? Somewhere in the world I always say this, somewhere in the
world there is a culture where if you don’t put a bagel on a shelf and it gets really
hard and crusty it’s not considered good tasting. Somewhere in the world, good
mothers take fresh bagels and put them away on a shelf for a week because in
that culture they don’t taste good until they are hard. See what I mean. I was in
Mongolia, you know this old monk he was like ninety years old he gave me the
honor of fermented mares milk, you know. And he had a big bowl of it and he
said here, you know. I am going to give you my only bowl of fermented mares
milk Oh....and he was very offended, and I didn’t want to offend him, but I
would throw up and I had another monk with me a Mongolian guy and I said,
here you drink it. He finished two bowls in like a minute, and the guy had a gas
can filled of fermented mares milk, see in that culture milk is not delicious until
you put it in a gasoline can and let it rot for a couple of weeks, see what I mean.
So the object is not, you laugh, but in Mongolia they would laugh at you, they
drink it fresh, they are so stupid you know what I mean. (Laugh) It means it’s
not self existent, okay I mean it’s not tasty from its own side. That’s the
emptiness of the object of the feeling. Remember that, okay. We covered it in
step number two, here we are isolating it and talking about it specially. And
again, use it with the situations and people in your life that make you unhappy,
because this meditation on emptiness works right away. Those other ones are
slower, this one is cool this one makes you happy right away, why? Does it
make fermented mare’s milk delicious at this moment?                 No, but it does
immediately address your reaction you stop feeling upset, you stop feeling
angry, you stop feeling stupid distaste for that thing. Why? Because you know
who made it. Who fermented that mare’s milk before Michael Roach got there?
Michael Roach’s karma, it wasn’t that old monk, okay. If it didn’t taste good to
me it was Michael Roach’s crappy karma who came there a few weeks before I
got there and started rotting this milk, you know what I mean seriously. And
stop blaming the guy, and stop blaming the milk and your life immediately,
what I am trying to say is I wanted to concentrate tonight on the emptiness of
your feeling because now you can immediately start to feel happier. If you
understand the emptiness of the things which piss you off, you’ll immediately
start to feel better, why? Because if you feel bad you are inviting them back, you
see. If you get upset, if you get angry, if you feel hatred for them, that is mental
karma you are inviting the thing to come back, you are causing the thing to
come back again. A Buddhist has to stop reacting to the whole negatively, you
can’t. Because every time you do you create a seed in your own mind for this
thing to happen again. It’s over with you can’t feel upset anymore, you can’t feel
angry anymore, you can’t feel hatred anymore. Because it’s stupid because you
know better now, because if you want that thing to come back then get upset, or
feel angry, or feel some kind of hatred for it that’s the power of understanding
the emptiness of your feelings, you see. If you understand the emptiness of
your feelings, the last thing you would ever want to do would be to get angry or
to feel upset at the things that piss you off. And if you stop doing that I swear to
God, okay if I had a bible I would. Um. Unshanti
dava (unclear) it works, it really works. You will find less and less bad things in
your life and more and more beautiful things will happen to you, really. Try it,
you can always just check it out. Buddhism is very cool, we are not afraid to say
try it. It’s not like pray to God and maybe it will work, maybe it won’t work.
It’s like try it and it will work, just try it. The only thing that can happen is you
won’t feel lousy, okay. (Laugh) Yeah, (student unclear) Yeah, I would personally
say that (unclear) can be included in number two, you see. It’s one of the three
elements isn’t it. But I believe that Master ShantiDavis is making a stronger
point by isolating it saying, don’t forget to pay special attention to the object.
Who made that person at your office that you don’t like, you did, you did. And
forget all world views which tell you anything else because they don’t work.
You’ll continue to be miserable your whole life unless you change over to this
world view, okay. Last one (silence) Say tay nooshin (unclear) karpa, Day
means (unclear) those feelings, of those feelings, right. Yuchen means the
subject meaning my mind, Michael Roach’s mind, okay. Yuchen means the
subject as opposed to the object. (Unclear) means has some nature of its own,
from its own side. Karpa means we deny it, we reject it, okay. To translate it
we deny in the fourth step of this mediation, you deny that the mind which is
having this pleasure or pain could have a nature of its own. Could be a mind
from its own side. It’s the answer to the question not who made this guy at
work that I don’t like. It’s rather the question who put me here, okay, you
know. (Laugh) It’s not asking why is he here in my office at this moment pissing
me off, who put me here to listen to him, okay. Who put the subject here? And
we deny that the subject is existing at random or that it was made by a guy with
a white beard or some big bang put me there on my desk okay, you put you
there, okay. You put the subject there the subject doesn’t exist from its own side.
It was not created by some guy it’s not an accident, without any explanation. It’s
not a big bang, okay. Your karma put you there to listen to that guy saying
those things to you this morning, okay. Your karma put you there if you don’t
like it fix your karma, okay. If everybody did that what would the world be like.
Let’s switch world views, okay. Alright, last one where is that last one, how
many last ones are there here. Say sockchay, sock means impurity, chay means
has impurity. Sockchay means its impure, impure. The last thing I want to talk
about tonight is the difference the way a Buddha feels and the way we feel, you
see, we have to talk about that. What’s the difference between the way a
Buddha feels and that way we feel? We said that the goal of Buddhism is not to
be like a vegetables without any feelings at all. And the goal of Buddhism is not
to learn how to sit there and let disasters happen in your life and feel econimity
about them, you know. Of course, you should hate them there stupid, there bad
and you should stop them and you know that in your heart. Your not going to
be satisfied if I tell you go home and have econimity while all this crap happens
to you and while you get old and while you die. Don’t worry, okay watch it
flow, you know. I think all these people should be locked in a room and let
them watch the flow of the dental drill or something. It doesn’t work that way,
your heart tells you it doesn’t work         Not like that. What’s the difference
between our feeling and a Buddha’s feeling. What’s the difference between our
discrimination and the way a Buddha discriminates. Let’s talk about feeling,
okay. Our feeling is sockchay would means dirty. A Buddha’s feeling is
sockchay which means totally pure. What’s the difference? A Buddha has the
deep awareness all the time, okay. It is one of the chong chuk, say chong chuk
(unclear) it’s one of the thirty-seven qualities of a Buddha, I means it’s one of the
thirty-seven attributes that a Buddha knows how to do. A Buddha is constantly
in a deep state of awareness about what’s really going on when they have
feeling, okay. When something happens and they feel good they understand the
emptiness of it all the time, they always have this awareness, deep awareness of
what’s happening to them. How does that relate to us? You can have that kind
of awareness and stop having impure types of feeling. What’s the difference
between an impure type of feeling and a pure type of feeling, okay. For us on a
level of our lives means if someone comes into you at work does something bad
to you, you get a bad feeling. You have stop and do a (unclear), you have go
into a state of meditation, awareness about your feelings. Meditation doesn’t
necessarily mean that you close your eyes, and you put your thumbs up and you
tell that guy can you wait five minutes, you know I’m going to meditate on you.
It don’t work that way, if you want to get him more pissed off try it. (Laugh)
(Unclear) said you can have a state of meditation at work, you know, it’s just a
focus a question of focus. Focusing up on the person, you feel the anger, you
feel the pain not anger yet, you feel the pain, come up in you right and at that
moment you have to enter the deep awareness of feelings you have go into
meditation on the deep awareness of those feelings. You have to understand the
emptiness of where this pain is coming from. You have to understand the
emptiness of the guy, you have to understand the emptiness of his words and
you have to understand the emptiness of your ears, you have to understand the
emptiness of the consciousness which hears what the ears report and most of all
you have to understand the emptiness of this situation, why is this happening to
me, okay. The emptiness of it is, it’s no other explanation except that this is
happening because of my past karma, okay. The last thing I want to do is get
mad because that is raw karma, you know. Talking is a kind of karma, moving
is a kind of karma, hitting someone who bothers you is a kind of karma but they
are very weak compared to mental karma. Mental karma is much more
powerful, the thoughts of anger even if you don’t say anything, even if you
don’t punch the guy, the thought coming strongly into your mind, is (unclear)
extremely powerful karma, okay. You already screwed up, okay. You already
set the scene for this person to come back into your life. And you will be
unhappy, you’ll just be unhappy. And then you won’t get what you want you
want to be happy. (Laugh) Very important of all the objects in the world for
your present happiness and for me that’s immediate. I understand that I might
take a future ride on Pluto some day or something like that, but it’s so remote
that I can’t really relate to it very well. I can very well relate to the people who
piss me off, you know. It happens every day, it happened this morning, you
know. Somebody dissed me I felt bad, I don’t want that anymore. You must
learn to go into the mediation of the awareness of the emptiness of your
feelings, okay. It’s really cool, try it , try each of those steps. That’s what Master
S Davis is talking about in this section, okay. Next time we’ll get into the
emptiness of your thoughts. That’s the next step. It is the last homework
question for tonight. It’s difficult I’m not going to lay it on you tonight, okay.
It’s nine forty I don’t want to freak you, I could do it and I wouldn’t do it very
well and you would be asleep by the time we finished. Then we could meditate
on the emptiness of your sleep, but (laugh). So leave that one we will do it on
Tuesday and we’ll shorten the rest of it, okay. We can do one or two questions,
okay. (Student unclear) What I mean to say about sockchay is impure feeling
means, you made a good point, impure feelings means the kind of feelings that
would make you do bad karma, okay. The kind of feelings that would make
you do bad karma, you could call it stupid feeling, alright. You Buddha used a
nicer word like ignorant. To put it in plain English it’s stupid any kind of stupid
feeling, the definition of a stupid feeling is one where you would hurt the person
back, you would say something to them, you would hate them in your mind,
which is the worst karma. Of course, its important not to say anything, not to
punch people it is important. But for a Buddhist, it’s much more subtle and much
more difficult you have to get as quick as a cat the minute your mind wants to
think a bad thought you have to catch him, turn around and say stop. This crap
about express your anger is crap, the minute you express it you’ve already had
intense mental karma, you’ve already collected a lot of mental seed to see this
person again, okay. That’s not true. Does it mean its note useful to explain to
someone why they are making you angry in a non angry way, that’s not what
I’m saying. I’m saying it’s not beneficial to get angry to let it out or something
like that you can analysis it and stop it And I don’t mean to bottle it up and never
explain to the person why they are making you angry. You should explain to
them why they’re making you angry. It’s better to wait a day or two, it’s
definitely better to wait a day or two. Then you can do it without getting angry,
hopefully, alright. (Student unclear) Yes, Nancy. Continue what, what do you
mean. (Unclear) A lot of people have asked me that and it’s kind of late to get
into. The idea of free will. It’s occurred to a lot of people in the class that if your
reasoning that you have given in this class for the last six and one half classes is
correct, it’s beginning to sound like even our choices are projections. In that case
there not really choices anymore. There kind of imposed on us by our past
karma so dictated by our past karma, we didn’t have any choice but to make this
choice you see what I mean. And that makes people feel they’re out of control
or they can’t get better easily because they’re like pretty much trapped in their
own karma that’s exactly the case, okay. That’s the exactly the case, okay. You
know the Buddha taught, somebody asked him, what are the odds of coming
back as a human against the odds of going to a hell rebirth. He licked his finger
and he touched the ground, okay. And he came up with one piece of lint there,
okay and he said that’s the number of people who come back as a human and
counting all the atoms of this planet is the number of people who don’t make it
back into the human realm, you know. And he was not exaggerating, okay.
That’s the odds, okay you are under the control of your past deeds, you are a
projection of your past deeds and which choices you make are all largely dictated
by your past deeds. Could you ever get out how long have you been here?
Countless eons, millions of years, literally but to make it to this class is an
unspeakable achievement, you know. It’s unspeakable the karma you have to
hear this for five minutes requires so much karma you can’t imagine what you
did to be in this class for five minutes, and that’s why these classes will end, you
know. And that’s why we’ll be torn from each other, you know. The karma is
extremely expensive and we’re using it. It’s extremely rare and the odds of
really getting it are extremely bad. And you have to try and you really have to
try hard and people say do I have to meditate, and I say no do you want to
wander around the Moscow Hotel again for another zillion years. (Unclear) I’m
not forcing you the odds are bad, are really very bad there is not much free will
and odds that are spoken in the (unclear) about coming up eternal that’s not an
exaggeration. The odds are really bad the choices you make are is one of the
four kinds of karmic results its called the, it’s the habit of doing that thing again,
it’s extremely difficult for a human being to change their karmic patterns, to do
that is almost impossible, you know. Much of the decisions you will make are
forced on you by things that happened a long time ago. Extremely difficult, and
the scriptures, that’s what they say. I don’t like to talk about it much, okay. But
we’re different we’re going to get out in one lifetime. (Laugh) Why? Because
the words do have meaning you do have the karma to hear them have meaning.
You can get out of this thing and ultimately you will because the words have
meaning and you understand the meaning, and that’s the perfection of wisdom,
you see what I mean. The understanding of emptiness is thousands of times
more powerful than the mispreceptions we’ve been laboring under for all these
centuries, and that’s why we have a chance, otherwise, it would be hopeless.
Free will or no free will if you can understand emptiness it gives you a very,
very good chance. If on top of that you have the great fortune to study the
secret teachings incredibly rare, incredibly powerful and incredibly sweet, if you
can get into that door, you know, someone can truly initiate you into then your
odds of you getting out in this lifetime are real. Then you really have good odds.
You really can do it but you have to learn it properly, and the person has to
know what they are doing and it’s very difficult to get initiated into it. I’m not
talking about the weekend initiations in New York City, excuse me. And I don’t
mean to criticize that, that you can do for $25.00 go pick up a flyer and so and so,
you know. Don’t forget to bring a little thing on your hand I’m not criticize but I
am. (Laugh). Not talking about that, that’s not (unclear). If you can get into the
real thing then you have a good (unclear). You can’t get into it unless you
understand everything, okay. (Unclear). Alright

Prayer: